it's too fking hard.
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 39,864
I'm sorry you are struggling, but you can do it. You can stop. If we can, so can you. What kind of support do you have other than SR? SR is great online support, but sometimes, we need something more.
We can give you our support, but we cannot do it for you. You need to put in the work, and it is work. It isn't easy, but it is worth it. Keep trying. (((HUGS)))
We can give you our support, but we cannot do it for you. You need to put in the work, and it is work. It isn't easy, but it is worth it. Keep trying. (((HUGS)))
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,755
I used to feel the same way, that I just couldn't do it. I was wrong. 
I did do it, over five years ago, and my life is better than ever.
You can do this. Get help if you need it. Believe in yourself. Just don't pick up that first drink.
I did do it, over five years ago, and my life is better than ever.You can do this. Get help if you need it. Believe in yourself. Just don't pick up that first drink.
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
It's OK to feel that way but you can stop if you really want to. How about calling a local hotline or a doctor? Sometimes you need some help to get started...and no shame in admitting so.
love is the answer
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 1,352
I keep trying to 'do it for my kids' but I fking can't. I love my kids but they're part of the reason I drink in the first place
Support? Nobody knows how bad it is. I mean 'bad' is relative right? So my 'bad' might be someone else's 'sober'. As such I'm not sure how to explain away my 'bottle of wine a night' as problem drinking. They just won't get it.
You guys do.
Support? Nobody knows how bad it is. I mean 'bad' is relative right? So my 'bad' might be someone else's 'sober'. As such I'm not sure how to explain away my 'bottle of wine a night' as problem drinking. They just won't get it.
You guys do.
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 39,864
People in AA know how bad it is; addiction counselors know how bad it is; detox facilities and rehabs know how bad it is. There is support out there from those who know exactly how bad it is and how much worse it can get. Please reach out and get the help you need.
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Originally Posted by mystified 
As such I'm not sure how to explain away my 'bottle of wine a night' as problem drinking. They just won't get it.
What types of support have you tried when attempting to quit before - AA or other meetings? Have you seen a doctor? Therapy and or counseling? Rehab or Detox? Simply "not drinking" rarely works.
love is the answer
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 1,352
Well partly it's because I'm not sleeping ( perhaps because I'm going to bed wasted most nights huh? ), partly is because I'm a mom of 3 kids 5 years and less. Partly is because I'm introvert and ocd and depressed and a perfectionist and my partner is distant and married to his job and works away a lot and I...... Well I just try to keep I everything together and never admit I'm struggling.
Sobriety is Traditional
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Orcas Island, Washington
Posts: 9,064
Originally Posted by mystified
I can't do it.
I can't stop
Fking help me.
I can't stop
Fking help me.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,234
I was 30 with 2 little ones 3 and 6 when
I entered recovery. Family did an intervention
on me sending me into rehab for 28 days.
Yes, I was scared. Yes I worried about my
little family wondering who would take care
of them like I do.
However, when family got me help I desperately
needed at that time in my life, I had to give up,
surrender myself to the fact that I was not healthy
enough to continue as I was.
So, as long as I was in rehab, my 2 little
ones and my then spouse did indeed survive.
Why wouldn't they. They had help from family
who cared. So my time in rehab was my own.
The only ones that could help me for 28 days were
the councilors and doctors who were familiar
with addiction. It was in rehab that I was taught
about my addiction and its affects on me and
those around me.
I listened, learned, absorbed all that I could
possible do those first 28 days before I was
sent home back to my life as a wife and mother.
However, I was now armed with many helpful
recovery tools and lots of knowledge about
addiction to use now in my new sober life.
Yes, I have been sober for 24 yrs now,
and yes, I raised my little family and Yes
I worked and incorporated my recovery
program in all areas of my life.
Today, im remarried, 6 yrs., my children
both are grown, healthy, happy, addiction
free and spouse remarried too.
My 25 yr marriage did end like many
who have someone in the family that
is sick with addiction. However, there
are many marriages that do survive
if everyone imbraces some sort of
recovery program suited for them
to grow healthy and happy together
as a family unit.
Communication and understanding
along with a recovery program learned
and applied to ones life can result in
healthy, happy, honest members in
society and life for yrs to come.
I entered recovery. Family did an intervention
on me sending me into rehab for 28 days.
Yes, I was scared. Yes I worried about my
little family wondering who would take care
of them like I do.
However, when family got me help I desperately
needed at that time in my life, I had to give up,
surrender myself to the fact that I was not healthy
enough to continue as I was.
So, as long as I was in rehab, my 2 little
ones and my then spouse did indeed survive.
Why wouldn't they. They had help from family
who cared. So my time in rehab was my own.
The only ones that could help me for 28 days were
the councilors and doctors who were familiar
with addiction. It was in rehab that I was taught
about my addiction and its affects on me and
those around me.
I listened, learned, absorbed all that I could
possible do those first 28 days before I was
sent home back to my life as a wife and mother.
However, I was now armed with many helpful
recovery tools and lots of knowledge about
addiction to use now in my new sober life.
Yes, I have been sober for 24 yrs now,
and yes, I raised my little family and Yes
I worked and incorporated my recovery
program in all areas of my life.
Today, im remarried, 6 yrs., my children
both are grown, healthy, happy, addiction
free and spouse remarried too.
My 25 yr marriage did end like many
who have someone in the family that
is sick with addiction. However, there
are many marriages that do survive
if everyone imbraces some sort of
recovery program suited for them
to grow healthy and happy together
as a family unit.
Communication and understanding
along with a recovery program learned
and applied to ones life can result in
healthy, happy, honest members in
society and life for yrs to come.
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 39,864
Mystified, please do not be the sole care taker of such young children while you are drinking. Someone just posted that they were thankful they were sober because one of their children burned themselves and they were able to drive that child to the ER. It only takes a second for a child to do something that could harm them or worse.
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