My first step to recovery...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Ferndown, UK
Posts: 3
My first step to recovery...
Hi guys, my first proactive step to quitting alcohol:
I have been drinking heavily for 30-years, starting on Beer, progressing through wine and, for as long as I can remember, a bottle of Whiskey *every day!* (pls read my profile...)
I have become a miserable, angry (very angry), intolerant person.
Things came to a head on Saturday night when my wife left me (first time ever!)
She came back Sunday morning and we both agreed drink, for both of us, was destroying us / destroying our family.
Our 2-sons were here to witness the agressive fighting (bad language / no fisticuffs you understand (EVER;-)
After 6-hours of talking they persuaded me how serious my/our problem was!
We have drunk every night of our 30-years together... The past 60-hours we have both been sober... already I feel a weight is lifting (although 2-nights of Cold Turkey has not been fun and I lost 5-pounds already!) - I can already see the light!... Just hope I will be able to stay on track!
We have set ourselves a big project to relandscape the back garden - something to focus on outside our normal routine - and, when my wife awakens, I shall suggest we get a Dog to take us on different daily paths...
Anyhow's that's a bit about about me for now... I'm in this for the long haul and hoping that your kind spirits (I read a lot of posts before signing up) will be of great assistence in my quest - thanks for listening... CHEERS! (or can't I say Cheers anymore ;-)
I have been drinking heavily for 30-years, starting on Beer, progressing through wine and, for as long as I can remember, a bottle of Whiskey *every day!* (pls read my profile...)
I have become a miserable, angry (very angry), intolerant person.
Things came to a head on Saturday night when my wife left me (first time ever!)
She came back Sunday morning and we both agreed drink, for both of us, was destroying us / destroying our family.
Our 2-sons were here to witness the agressive fighting (bad language / no fisticuffs you understand (EVER;-)
After 6-hours of talking they persuaded me how serious my/our problem was!
We have drunk every night of our 30-years together... The past 60-hours we have both been sober... already I feel a weight is lifting (although 2-nights of Cold Turkey has not been fun and I lost 5-pounds already!) - I can already see the light!... Just hope I will be able to stay on track!
We have set ourselves a big project to relandscape the back garden - something to focus on outside our normal routine - and, when my wife awakens, I shall suggest we get a Dog to take us on different daily paths...
Anyhow's that's a bit about about me for now... I'm in this for the long haul and hoping that your kind spirits (I read a lot of posts before signing up) will be of great assistence in my quest - thanks for listening... CHEERS! (or can't I say Cheers anymore ;-)
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: New Orleans, LA
Posts: 985
Cheers Bill! Here's to a new life! One in which you can trust yourself, and trust that you'll get to make choices, instead of having them made for you!
It is both an extra support & an extra challenge for the two of you to do this together. You'll be learning each other all over again, after so many years.
Your garden project sounds great, and I will say that - for me - my relationship with my pup has been a centerpiece of my sobriety.
Do you have some support groups in your area (AA or other?). I find an in person group to be an excellent companion to this SR community. I am more open & myself here, but appreciate spending time with the sober folks in my town to do activities...
It is both an extra support & an extra challenge for the two of you to do this together. You'll be learning each other all over again, after so many years.
Your garden project sounds great, and I will say that - for me - my relationship with my pup has been a centerpiece of my sobriety.
Do you have some support groups in your area (AA or other?). I find an in person group to be an excellent companion to this SR community. I am more open & myself here, but appreciate spending time with the sober folks in my town to do activities...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Ferndown, UK
Posts: 3
Thanks HeartCore - really appreciated.
It's hard to believe but, it's only day #3, I already feel a new spring in my step and real excitement at being in control again (and not being controlled!)
I originally considered AA but I read a book 'How to kick the drink, easily' from a real hardcore [ex] Alcoholic (he prefers not to call it 'recovering as Alcohol Addiction is just that, an Adiction, not a decease (yes, subjective, depends on what helps one deal with it, I think...). He had been in and out of rehab and tried the AA routes... His advice was that AA is a bad organization and thrives on your fears... Now, that's his opinion and he/I know it is helpful to many people but we'll try the Cold Turkey approach with each others support first and see how we cope. IF I/we fall off the wagon then we will consider other alternatives - one way or other we are committed to acheiving this ;-)
We decided to keep the booze in the cupboard to prove how strong we were but, after a rethink this morning, I am now going to pour it down the sink tonight to remove any temptations...
Early days / thanks for your comment :-)
It's hard to believe but, it's only day #3, I already feel a new spring in my step and real excitement at being in control again (and not being controlled!)
I originally considered AA but I read a book 'How to kick the drink, easily' from a real hardcore [ex] Alcoholic (he prefers not to call it 'recovering as Alcohol Addiction is just that, an Adiction, not a decease (yes, subjective, depends on what helps one deal with it, I think...). He had been in and out of rehab and tried the AA routes... His advice was that AA is a bad organization and thrives on your fears... Now, that's his opinion and he/I know it is helpful to many people but we'll try the Cold Turkey approach with each others support first and see how we cope. IF I/we fall off the wagon then we will consider other alternatives - one way or other we are committed to acheiving this ;-)
We decided to keep the booze in the cupboard to prove how strong we were but, after a rethink this morning, I am now going to pour it down the sink tonight to remove any temptations...
Early days / thanks for your comment :-)
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: C.C. Ma.
Posts: 3,697
Originally Posted by Bill3238 
Thanks HeartCore - really appreciated.
It's hard to believe but, it's only day #3, I already feel a new spring in my step and real excitement at being in control again (and not being controlled!)
I originally considered AA but I read a book 'How to kick the drink, easily' from a real hardcore [ex] Alcoholic (he prefers not to call it 'recovering as Alcohol Addiction is just that, an Adiction, not a decease (yes, subjective, depends on what helps one deal with it, I think...). He had been in and out of rehab and tried the AA routes... His advice was that AA is a bad organization and thrives on your fears... Now, that's his opinion and he/I know it is helpful to many people but we'll try the Cold Turkey approach with each others support first and see how we cope. IF I/we fall off the wagon then we will consider other alternatives - one way or other we are committed to acheiving this ;-)
We decided to keep the booze in the cupboard to prove how strong we were but, after a rethink this morning, I am now going to pour it down the sink tonight to remove any temptations...
Early days / thanks for your comment :-)
It's hard to believe but, it's only day #3, I already feel a new spring in my step and real excitement at being in control again (and not being controlled!)
I originally considered AA but I read a book 'How to kick the drink, easily' from a real hardcore [ex] Alcoholic (he prefers not to call it 'recovering as Alcohol Addiction is just that, an Adiction, not a decease (yes, subjective, depends on what helps one deal with it, I think...). He had been in and out of rehab and tried the AA routes... His advice was that AA is a bad organization and thrives on your fears... Now, that's his opinion and he/I know it is helpful to many people but we'll try the Cold Turkey approach with each others support first and see how we cope. IF I/we fall off the wagon then we will consider other alternatives - one way or other we are committed to acheiving this ;-)
We decided to keep the booze in the cupboard to prove how strong we were but, after a rethink this morning, I am now going to pour it down the sink tonight to remove any temptations...
Early days / thanks for your comment :-)
Hi
I take exception to the term ex alcoholic. I’ve learned that once a person is alcoholic it’s for life and the person can no longer drink alcohol in safety. Period.
“He had been in and out of rehab and tried the AA routes... His advice was that AA is a bad organization and thrives on your fears...”
It happens to be an organization that has helped millions worldwide and works when we work it!
For the vast majority of alcoholics, when they become honest about their drinking, discover it’s been their fears that have been the reason for drinking and needs to be addressed far more often than it is.
BE WELL
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: North of England
Posts: 1,442
Welcome Bill. For what it's worth I agree with your take on AA. No doubt they've helped millions, but it does seem to be a bit of a life sentence. I go to counselling. Early days yet though. All the best and good job chucking the booze away! Best thing!
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,510
Welcome, Bill!
I think pouring out the alcohol at home is a good idea. No need to test yourself at this point. I have found that not keeping alcohol in the house eliminates worry.
Hmm, we all have our own ideas. I do believe alcoholism is a disease, rather than a character defect. I do not use AA. Some members here do use it, some don't. I think whatever works for you is the way to go.
I would caution you that stopping drinking is not the beginning and end of the story. Most of us have underlying issues which brought us to this place. It will be difficult to give 30 yrs of drinking without making some fundamental changes in your life. For instance, I stayed away from places where alcohol was being served for many months until I felt ready.
I think pouring out the alcohol at home is a good idea. No need to test yourself at this point. I have found that not keeping alcohol in the house eliminates worry.
Hmm, we all have our own ideas. I do believe alcoholism is a disease, rather than a character defect. I do not use AA. Some members here do use it, some don't. I think whatever works for you is the way to go.
I would caution you that stopping drinking is not the beginning and end of the story. Most of us have underlying issues which brought us to this place. It will be difficult to give 30 yrs of drinking without making some fundamental changes in your life. For instance, I stayed away from places where alcohol was being served for many months until I felt ready.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Ferndown, UK
Posts: 3
Thank you all for your warm welcome. I am under no illusions it will be easy. I have changed my daily rota as much as possible - I was even decorating at 6pm when I'm normally bladdered!
It was really weird leaving the Supermarket with *just* food today! I normally have 2L of Spirits and relevant mixers and Ice... Only cost me £10 today / normally costs me £60 ;-)
It was really weird leaving the Supermarket with *just* food today! I normally have 2L of Spirits and relevant mixers and Ice... Only cost me £10 today / normally costs me £60 ;-)
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