Alcohol stole my trust
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Dallas, Texas
Posts: 2,459
Alcohol stole my trust
As I get further and further away from the clutches of evil (booze) I can see in retrospect just how jaded and cynical I had become. Walking through life with a chip on my shoulder the size of a Buick. One sideways look, one misinterpreted verbal exchange and I was ready to rumble. That is NOT my normal core self. Alcohol flooded my brain with lies and innuendo, crushed my spirit and took my faith away.
Now, I can laugh at silly things my cat does or enjoy watching the kids fly a kite yesterday. I can read a book and actually retain what I have read. I enjoy movies more. I have returned to my passion for art. I can talk with people and not have a victim stance or an attitude. The world is not out to get me as alcohol would have me believe. Selfish bastard that alcohol. Wanted me all for itself. Well too bad!
Now, I can laugh at silly things my cat does or enjoy watching the kids fly a kite yesterday. I can read a book and actually retain what I have read. I enjoy movies more. I have returned to my passion for art. I can talk with people and not have a victim stance or an attitude. The world is not out to get me as alcohol would have me believe. Selfish bastard that alcohol. Wanted me all for itself. Well too bad!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Dallas, Texas
Posts: 2,459
Hi Jen - I really enjoy ceramics (working with clay is therapeutic). I also paint, watercolor mostly as well as sketch (pencil and charcoal). I hope to convert my garage into an art studio soon.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 4,860
I'm glad you've made these strides, ArtFriend. Good! You sound like a creative person -- and a free spirit. The world needs more like you.
I write the following with some reluctance; please know what I am saying comes from a good place:
To be honest, some of that "ready to rumble" still seems to be gnawing at you. You were pretty angry earlier this week here on SR -- kind of in "put up your dukes" mode. One of our friends ended up apologizing to you, even though what was said was kind-hearted and intended to help. I didn't really think the apology was warranted but it was gracious.
Anger is something most of us experience, especially as the permanence of a life without alcohol sinks in. We have fond memories of it sometimes, memories that can occasionally supersede the rest of our recollections.
I wondered whether you'd consider joining your class here on SR. I'm a huge advocate for our classes for a variety of reasons:
- It gives us the chance to get to know a subset of folks here on SR extra well. We know the unique challenges one another face.
- It gives us the chance to be, for lack of a better word, one another's cheerleaders. Those months when big milestones come along are really special in the classrooms.
- It gives us the chance to hold one another accountable when we're not at our best.
- It gives us the chance to deepen our commitment with people on the same timeline.
In my classroom, I'll swear you could have set a clock by us, especially in the first year. We often were dealing with the same emotions at the same time. That shared experience is something I continue to value greatly.
It doesn't matter if you weren't a part of your class at the beginning. I joined mine two months after its inception.
Hope you take this as positive encouragement.
I write the following with some reluctance; please know what I am saying comes from a good place:
To be honest, some of that "ready to rumble" still seems to be gnawing at you. You were pretty angry earlier this week here on SR -- kind of in "put up your dukes" mode. One of our friends ended up apologizing to you, even though what was said was kind-hearted and intended to help. I didn't really think the apology was warranted but it was gracious.
Anger is something most of us experience, especially as the permanence of a life without alcohol sinks in. We have fond memories of it sometimes, memories that can occasionally supersede the rest of our recollections.
I wondered whether you'd consider joining your class here on SR. I'm a huge advocate for our classes for a variety of reasons:
- It gives us the chance to get to know a subset of folks here on SR extra well. We know the unique challenges one another face.
- It gives us the chance to be, for lack of a better word, one another's cheerleaders. Those months when big milestones come along are really special in the classrooms.
- It gives us the chance to hold one another accountable when we're not at our best.
- It gives us the chance to deepen our commitment with people on the same timeline.
In my classroom, I'll swear you could have set a clock by us, especially in the first year. We often were dealing with the same emotions at the same time. That shared experience is something I continue to value greatly.
It doesn't matter if you weren't a part of your class at the beginning. I joined mine two months after its inception.
Hope you take this as positive encouragement.
New Life Sober
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: Noblesville, IN
Posts: 777
That's awesome, Art Studio that's what I want to do- I want to post all my photo pictures and my daughter art and my best friend does oil paint and make a museum for people to walk around and look at them. I did pottery for a while, but now I need a job to buy more clay and stuff.
I do digital scrapkits just a hobby though
I do digital scrapkits just a hobby though
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Midwest USA
Posts: 630
Originally Posted by Venecia 
I wondered whether you'd consider joining your class here on SR. I'm a huge advocate for our classes for a variety of reasons:
- It gives us the chance to get to know a subset of folks here on SR extra well. We know the unique challenges one another face.
- It gives us the chance to be, for lack of a better word, one another's cheerleaders. Those months when big milestones come along are really special in the classrooms.
- It gives us the chance to hold one another accountable when we're not at our best.
- It gives us the chance to deepen our commitment with people on the same timeline.
In my classroom, I'll swear you could have set a clock by us, especially in the first year. We often were dealing with the same emotions at the same time. That shared experience is something I continue to value greatly.
It doesn't matter if you weren't a part of your class at the beginning. I joined mine two months after its inception.
Hope you take this as positive encouragement.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
Just find the Class group that corresponds to the month you quit...The current month (March) is in this Newcomers Forum...it should be on page one 
previous months can be found in our Daily Support Forum
Newcomer's Daily Support Threads - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
Once you find the month, just jump right in and say hi - that's all you need to do
D
previous months can be found in our Daily Support Forum
Newcomer's Daily Support Threads - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
Once you find the month, just jump right in and say hi - that's all you need to do
D
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
As I get further and further away from the clutches of evil (booze) I can see in retrospect just how jaded and cynical I had become. Walking through life with a chip on my shoulder the size of a Buick. One sideways look, one misinterpreted verbal exchange and I was ready to rumble. That is NOT my normal core self. Alcohol flooded my brain with lies and innuendo, crushed my spirit and took my faith away.
Now, I can laugh at silly things my cat does or enjoy watching the kids fly a kite yesterday. I can read a book and actually retain what I have read. I enjoy movies more. I have returned to my passion for art. I can talk with people and not have a victim stance or an attitude. The world is not out to get me as alcohol would have me believe. Selfish bastard that alcohol. Wanted me all for itself. Well too bad!
Now, I can laugh at silly things my cat does or enjoy watching the kids fly a kite yesterday. I can read a book and actually retain what I have read. I enjoy movies more. I have returned to my passion for art. I can talk with people and not have a victim stance or an attitude. The world is not out to get me as alcohol would have me believe. Selfish bastard that alcohol. Wanted me all for itself. Well too bad!
The effect alcohol had on me and my worldview was so insidious it actually took me about 3 months to realise just how jaded and dark I'd become.
I like being an optimist again
D
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