Left Alcoholic Relationship
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Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 7
Left Alcoholic Relationship
Has anyone ever hit bottom through a relationship with another alcoholic? I fell deeply in love with a man ...another drinker...but I got out to save myself. If I stayed I knew I would die. But leaving feels like death. I never told him why I left. I just left to save myself.
I'm leaving two loves, alcohol and him. And it hurts. Feedback most welcome.
I'm leaving two loves, alcohol and him. And it hurts. Feedback most welcome.
Has anyone ever hit bottom through a relationship with another alcoholic? I fell deeply in love with a man ...another drinker...but I got out to save myself. If I stayed I knew I would die. But leaving feels like death. I never told him why I left. I just left to save myself.
I'm leaving two loves, alcohol and him. And it hurts. Feedback most welcome.
I'm leaving two loves, alcohol and him. And it hurts. Feedback most welcome.
My fiance actually left me because of my drinking. I was devastated at the time. Now looking back I know in my heart I wouldn't have gotten or stayed sober if we were still together. He liked to drink which is fine for him it doesn't cause problems in his life. More importantly I would have never felt right putting the time and effort I need to into my recovery if I was in a relationship. I know how hard it is but you are worth it.
Has anyone ever hit bottom through a relationship with another alcoholic? I fell deeply in love with a man ...another drinker...but I got out to save myself. If I stayed I knew I would die. But leaving feels like death. I never told him why I left. I just left to save myself.
I'm leaving two loves, alcohol and him. And it hurts. Feedback most welcome.
I'm leaving two loves, alcohol and him. And it hurts. Feedback most welcome.
I HAD to get rid of her to move on, and later after we split up I ended up in hospital. The beginning of my sobriety
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 7
Thanks for your replies. It's good to know I'm not alone. While I know it was the right decision, I'm struggling with guilt over how I ended it. I just sent him his stuff and cut contact (after an argument over something else). But the real reason I left, of course, was the drinking.
Should I ever go back and make amends? I certainly don't feel strong enough now, I would likely drink over it...or maybe fall back into things with him...
Should I ever go back and make amends? I certainly don't feel strong enough now, I would likely drink over it...or maybe fall back into things with him...
Thanks for your replies. It's good to know I'm not alone. While I know it was the right decision, I'm struggling with guilt over how I ended it. I just sent him his stuff and cut contact (after an argument over something else). But the real reason I left, of course, was the drinking.
Should I ever go back and make amends? I certainly don't feel strong enough now, I would likely drink over it...or maybe fall back into things with him...
Should I ever go back and make amends? I certainly don't feel strong enough now, I would likely drink over it...or maybe fall back into things with him...
Very sensible xxx
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Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 1,869
I'm proud of you!!! It is SO HARD to cut someone off and cut contact. You know in your heart what needed to be done and if your life depended on it you are doing the right thing. Only you know if you need to reach out to him for closure. I would suggest that if you do at least wait a bit so that your emotions aren't as raw. Take time to heal. You are not bad for doing what you need to do to change your life in a positive way.
Read a lot here. You will learn from others.
Read a lot here. You will learn from others.
EndGame
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 4,677
My ex did pretty much the same thing. As far as I'm concerned, she owes me nothing.
Oh lotus! Hugs!
I left my alcoholic partner back in December when I decided to get sober and boy, it's been a struggle to stay away because I do still love him! I left because he was trying to sabotage my sobriety and I knew I had to leave if I wanted to have any sort of chance at a sober life so I totally get where your coming from!
If you feel iffy about seeing him FOR ANY REASON THEN STAY AWAY! There's no reason to make amends or have any contact with him right now! It's too soon and your emotions are too raw! Give it time...a real long time...before you even think about seeing him.
It's been three months for me, and even NOW it's hard to be around my ex and not get sucked back into a really unhealthy relationship. Save yourself, lotus. Stay strong and keep looking forward! ❤️
I left my alcoholic partner back in December when I decided to get sober and boy, it's been a struggle to stay away because I do still love him! I left because he was trying to sabotage my sobriety and I knew I had to leave if I wanted to have any sort of chance at a sober life so I totally get where your coming from!
If you feel iffy about seeing him FOR ANY REASON THEN STAY AWAY! There's no reason to make amends or have any contact with him right now! It's too soon and your emotions are too raw! Give it time...a real long time...before you even think about seeing him.
It's been three months for me, and even NOW it's hard to be around my ex and not get sucked back into a really unhealthy relationship. Save yourself, lotus. Stay strong and keep looking forward! ❤️
Oh Lotus. I'm sure it hurts like heck but I understand having to get out of a relationship to stay sober and live. I felt like that last Nov. stay strong. Pick life. Journal and remember this feeling that you want to live. Prayers your way.
lotusgirl. Save yourself first. It will hurt in more ways than one. But after you become well, you may have a different outlook on the whole relationship. I just went through a breakup myself. It still hurts. But with every passing day I realize that the whole relationship was dysfunctional and I am much better off being sober.
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