i'm back
 

hi folks! looking for some inspiration. I don't know where to start... but I did it again. I drank a lot Saturday into Sunday and while I had a great time doing it, I feel horrible about it and guilty. I don't remember the end of the night which is always the worst feeling. i feel like I need to stop! but then I start thinking about a bachelor party im going to in a few months or having some wine with family, or the cruise im going on in April! How can I skip on drinking in such cases!?!?

sorry I'm just thinking out loud. don't even know what to say. was scared to post...

By skipping the events!

If you want to get sober (and you don't sound convinced you do), you have to be prepared to make the changes necessary to support your decision to seek sobriety. And yes, even if it means not attending alcohol-centric events and vacations.

I hope you succeed in getting your mind around quitting and what it takes to do so. Because if you don't the drinking will only escalate, the blackouts will get worse. And goodness knows what could happen in the midst of one.

:(

Aww...scaredofchange, don't be scared of posting. :hug: Also, welcome back!

I would agree with doggonecarl with skipping these events is going to be important if you want sobriety.

One of the things you need to figure out is what is more important to you; your sobriety or these events. If you can't get out of them, start making sure you do not commit yourself to any event with drinking involved from here on out. I would have had serious issues moving forward and getting sober if I kept on putting events into my life that centered around drinking.

Just to add, you can make a plan if you go to these events on what you will do if you are tempted to drink (leave, have a seltzer water in hand, go for a walk, etc). I think this is the much harder option, but wanted to let you know.

thank you both for the words of wisdom.

Don't view it as missing out on something. Keep in mind all the things that you are gaining!!!

Changing me mind set has made a huge difference in my attitude.

thanks!!! :). I believe that I use it to mask my social anxiety. being sober can feel overwhelming and those first couple drinks really help me relax.

Welcome back !

I have social anxiety as well. Getting plastered is not a very good way I used to deal with it.
Now sober, I imagine everyone in social events naked. Works great! ;-)

If you are truly worried about heading down the wrong path because alcohol will be involved, I agree with what others have said and skip the events. As your name states...scared of change. Change is necessary. Nothing changes if nothing changes (someone else on this site uses that phrase quite a bit and its true)

The only thing we have to do is not drink. The rest are choices either good or bad. May things be uncomfortable, may it ruffle some feathers, may you lose money? These are all possible but you still do not have to go.

When my only son got married I warned him that I made no guarantees how long I would be at the reception or that I would attend at all.

For me my very life hinges on me not taking the first drink

Welcome back!! Might be time for a few quiet Sober weekends in!!

Tough decisions are needed to make Sobriety work!!

thank you!

You can do this Scared

You don't 'skip drinking', you choose to be a non-drinker. It worked for me when I finally accepted that alcohol was no longer an option for me, ever. It's not a punishment, it's a choice you make for yourself and your family to live the best life you can.