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Telling my parents I need help

Old 03-02-2015, 02:21 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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You are fortunate in that you have many things going for you and that your father is in recovery.....

he may already know about you

either way I hope you get some much needed support and enter recovery

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Old 03-02-2015, 06:35 AM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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putting a slightly different perspective on this.

Many parents don't like to acknowledge the fact that their child has a problem with drinking. I hope your father is supportive and understanding but if he is not then do not let that dissuade you from your recovery.

This is your recovery. You do not need anyone's permission or acceptance. You only need to accept it yourself and I agree with the previous poster who said put your energies into your plan of recovery rather than worrying about what your parents will say.

You are not on your own. You have SR, AA or what ever plan of recovery you choose to take. Stick around SR, read what is available and consider what best suits you and your circumstances.
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Old 03-02-2015, 06:57 AM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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Glad you're here!

It's not failure to ask for help......just the opposite!
You're young and your future is indeed bright. I am encouraged when I see youthful people recognize they have a problem and seek help.

Good for you!
I am sure you're Dad love you unconditionally and will share with you what he did- of course that may be different for you somewhat. It your recovery......

Keep coming back!~
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Old 03-07-2015, 07:34 PM
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Just an update, I am still struggling, I can see no way out. I thought telling my dad would help. I did and he already knew. He invited me to AA. BUT it is a problem deep inside me which I cannot help. I should go AA. My whole life is crumbling apart. At the age of 23 that might sound like a naive thing but I can't 'function' anymore. I feel like I need to be locked in a cell to stop me. It didn't help i got randomly beaten up this week ever.
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Old 03-07-2015, 07:36 PM
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why not try AA, or some other meeting based recovery group? what have you got to lose?

Nothing changes if nothing changes, themadone?

D
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Old 03-07-2015, 07:39 PM
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Originally Posted by Dee74 View Post
why not try AA, or some other meeting based recovery group? what have you got to lose?

Nothing changes if nothing changes, themadone?

D
I don't know to be honest. What is it like?
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Old 03-07-2015, 07:53 PM
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Did you ask your Dad?
I was just following up on your statement that you should go to AA.

I didn't use AA - I just used SR. If SR's not enough for you then you need to widen your net, yeah?
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Old 03-07-2015, 08:35 PM
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Originally Posted by Dee74 View Post
Did you ask your Dad?
I was just following up on your statement that you should go to AA.

I didn't use AA - I just used SR. If SR's not enough for you then you need to widen your net, yeah?
Thanks for replying,

No I need more help. The funny thing is I have known since I was 12, So 12 years ago now . When people say admittance is the first step, I have always known. I once told my brother about the problem when I was 21, he said I was a hypochondriac. I tried to explain my drinking is different but no one would listen. It devastated me for a while. In fact every single person I told apart from my Dad told me I was just "over thinking things".
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Old 03-07-2015, 08:41 PM
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Originally Posted by Dee74 View Post
Did you ask your Dad?
I was just following up on your statement that you should go to AA.

I didn't use AA - I just used SR. If SR's not enough for you then you need to widen your net, yeah?
Oh also I did ask my Dad and he was coy about it. In a good way he said he didn't want to give personal info. Obviously he said it helped and people talked.

I didn't explain that my father, who I now love, was a terrible **** growing up with alcohol.
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Old 03-08-2015, 12:36 AM
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Go to the AA meeting. You have nothing to lose. They say you can always have your misery refunded at the door if you don't like it.

Your dad is sober. If you do what he does you'll get sober. I'm sure it wasn't easy for him to stop either.

He may have been a jerk in the past but that's neither here nor there at this point. Look to the future!
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Old 03-08-2015, 01:39 AM
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I was dead afraid of talking to my parents about my problems, but eventually they realized i had a problem and they told me to go to rehab. Being honest with them ended up being one of the best decisions of my life. Not only have I gotten better, but my relationship with them is ten times better than before!
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Old 03-08-2015, 03:15 AM
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themadone telling your Dad will bring enormous relief and chances are he is going to understand. We call that voice in our heads AV (alcoholic voice) and you can overcome that, many of us have, you can too.
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Old 03-08-2015, 03:46 AM
  # 33 (permalink)  
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You have your whole life ahead of you. Do whatever you must to get this straightened out now. I hear the people at AA don't bite. They sure aren't going to shame you or not take you seriously. I mean "this" is what they do.

Maybe for you it will take rehab, or maybe, like Dee, SR will do it. But you must focus here and now and make this your mission to fix this thing. I believe that focused time spent is the answer to everything . . . and a willingness to ask for help. Don't worry about feeling humiliated at this point. If humiliation is an issue for you, if you don't get help there is way more of that waiting for you.

I am sorry about the passing out thing at work. That must have been really bad, with your boss counting on you and everything. You can take the right steps now so that you will not have to fear the "next" thing happening.

Believe me, all of us here have our humiliating, life-wrecking moments that we wish we could take back, but we can't. We can only do what we must to make things better from here on. That is what you must do as well.
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Old 04-13-2015, 10:43 PM
  # 34 (permalink)  
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Hi again
I thank you for all your previous messages, it is truly comforting. I did tell my parents about my addiction. They already knew as I suspected. I will give some background to this. I told my brother a few years ago I was an alcoholic and I remember the response of "you're a hypochondriac". It was devastating to me. Not because I believed him but because he did not believe me. I confided in one friend who had a similar response. It centres around my age. "Someone so young cannot possibly be an alcoholic" is the mantra.
Recently I have been drinking ridiculous amounts. We are talking 100 plus units a week. I have actually been drunk or hungover for 3 years. I forgot what it feels like to be normal. When i say normal i mean just feeling psychically normal. So I suppose things are getting worse since I posted. The thing is alcoholism is so damn clever. There is always an excuse or reason to drink.
This is also coupled with depression which makes everything harder. I also tried to kill myself by tying a plastic bag over my head and going to sleep.I survived by, presumably, breaking a hole when I was frantically trying to stay alive. The experience was incredibly painful, your body will do everything to cling on to life. I can't explain the feeling it was horrible; like someone stabbing the lungs constantly. The last 30 seconds before I passed out were different though. I presume it was a lack of oxygen, I felt really nice and warm. I hallucinated smiling faces and thought it was all over. I don't think many people have faced death. I certainly thought it was all over. At this stage I was content. BUT I woke up to my frantic mother screaming for help. Then the realization sinks in that you have done this to other people.
I can't quite believe I actually did this to myself. I mean both in alcohol and suicide. Remember when you were a kid? Did you ever think this would happen?
Anyway I am going to go to my GP. I have had enough of the alcohol and feeling ****.
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Old 04-13-2015, 11:11 PM
  # 35 (permalink)  
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Heres help making a sobriety plan http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html

Trust me get sober and watch your life change it is hard it isnt going to be overnight but hang around strenghten your acceptance

Listen to the exellent advice i know you can do this i believe in you friend
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Old 04-13-2015, 11:17 PM
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You sound like your in a great deal of pain. Is rehab an option for you? It sounds like you need lots of love and support. Depression and alcoholism is a horrible mix but with the right support and treatment you can have the life you want.
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Old 04-13-2015, 11:19 PM
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I'm really glad you're still here to tell the tale.

Make this your turning point...some of us have faced similar things or worse....you really can turn this around themadone

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