SoberLeigh

Enjoy your friends, family and your club soda. They are truly a great combination.

Gonnachange

Thanks. All went according to plan.

Got through the parties in fine fashion, but definitely tired.

Della1968

SoberLeigh

Glad to hear that your weekend went so well, GC.

Gonnachange

More about the parties....

There was drinking, but with one exception everyone was responsible. Not that I was keeping tabs on who was drinking what, but using behavior as a barometer. I'm not going to lie and say I wasn't tempted, but getting through Saturday night gave me some good momentum to not have any mimosas the next morning.

At one point it became obvious that one of our guests had a little too much. She was safe and among friends and everyone did what they could to make sure she was comfortable. Giving some context, she knew she was over served and just laid down on the couch before getting very emotional. My concern was that she was cared for; that it changed the tenor of the party and conversations for a while didn't bother me. I can also state that I
wouldn't have wanted to trade places with her; I, along with my wife, were working hard to host, but we were both enjoying ourselves and knew that we'd remember every conversation. Expectedly, the woman wasn't at her best the next morning and although tired I was glad to wake up with clarity and in fine form to get brunch on the table of the eight of us. Again, I wouldn't have wanted to trade places.

Two challenges this upcoming weekend; we're hosting a party Friday night and we're going to my SIL's house for a big family Easter party on Sunday. I'll get my game plan in order as the days get closer.

Gonnachange

Thanks.

It was a lot of fun, but tiring. Last to bed and first up is not a good combination, but comes with being the host and hostess.

Gonnachange

In a couple of minutes it's going to be 20 hours since my last drink. Yeah, that's not a typo. Last night around 9 I had a drink, finishing about 30 minutes later before heading to bed. So, I got through the hard part of hosting this past weekend's parties and decided to lower my defenses on a Monday night, even if it was only one. Pretty smart, right? I promise I'll have better things to write about tomorrow.

Tomorrow, I'll probably spend some time reading while I wait for my son to come home from his time at the beach. I'm really busy tomorrow, but am leaning toward taking Thursday off to spend some time with him. Of course, I have no idea what his schedule is, but I do know that all of his friends from high school are done with their respective spring breaks and are back at school so he won't have many social outlets.

Gonnachange

I mean to type "Tonight."

Soberwolf

Hello GC

Gonnachange

Hi SW. Been an interesting evening. The good is that my son came home around 8:15 after a fun time at the beach. The not so good is that we found out my FIL has a hernia and will need surgery. As the oldest sibling my wife has been anointed the point person by her mother and has spent a couple of hours gathering and disseminating information to her siblings. He's a generally healthy person, but being 83 there are some other issues that need to be considered.

With respect to SR, nothing stronger than club soda has been had all night by anyone in the house. We need our wits about us and not the haze of alcohol.

Gonnachange

Too late to edit my last post. I was going to add that it's not going to be as early an evening as I anticipated, but there will be no alcohol involved and I'll be at the gym tomorrow morning to move some iron.

Gonnachange

Just One

Did not turn out to be just one last night. Obviously on some level I knew that it would turn out that way because I've seen the play before and know how Act 2 goes, but went ahead regardless. Coming on the heels of Monday, when I really did have only one, I feel as I'm losing the focus toward sobriety that I had earlier. So, I'm going to remember how I'm feeling this morning and redouble my efforts. I do not drink and I'm not going to change my mind.

I'm feeling worse mentally than physically, meaning I'm quite annoyed and disappointed with myself. Furthermore, if the morning played out as it should have I would have already been done with a short training run in preparation for my race in slightly over four weeks. I'm coming up to 11 AM so there's plenty of time left in the day, but I promised my son we'd do something together this afternoon and given the limited amount of time we have before he goes back to college that's going to trump my training. If I don't get my training done today it's going to be a direct negative consequence of my decisions last night.

Decisions and consequences. I understand the concept well and along with my wife have spent a lot of time trying to teach our kids about the relationship between the two. I think we've done a good job with respect to that, but last night I clearly didn't think it through and it's looking as if I'll be paying the price today by missing my opportunity to lace 'em up and get some miles on the road. Not good.

Time to hit the "Submit" button before I really start rambling.

Della1968

Ramble all you want

Gonnachange

When writing posts like this morning's I'm of mixed mind. I know I should be here and write as I did because I need the support to get to where I'm leading a sober life, but when I write that the consequences of me making some bad decisions is that I won't be able to run today my narrative seems very shallow. Fortunately that is the worst from last night, but I think it comes across as a bit whiney (needy?) especially when compared to some of the really serious issues some folks are dealing with either with their own struggles or that of loved ones.

Speaking of loved ones, I took advantage of today's wonderful weather and took a walk with my son. In about 30 minutes we're going to see a movie; by far and away not my first choice on how to spend the nicest afternoon to date in 2015, but stuff like that is right in my son's wheel house and I'll accommodate him.

For dinner tonight I'm going to grill some rib eye steaks, roast some potatoes with garlic and rosemary, and serve a garden salad.

Della1968

It's perfect streak weather! Finally a nice day. I just wish it would dry up so I could get outside. I would rather see you aware of things and work them rather than ignore it and have worse consequences

EndGameNYC

Rather than "redouble" your effort, GC, it's probably time that you get involved in additional support. For me, trying hard or being a good guy was not and never would be enough. You've been around long enough to know that just putting down the drink often leads to another relapse. And then another, and another.

In the long term, missing out on a run or a workout is trivial in comparison to what's at stake here.

dwtbd

Dinner sounds grand, I'd pair that with a pitcher of sweet tea(but then again I pair everything with that). A nice early evening , head to bed with either a good book or movie ,and wake to take on another day clearheaded. then repeat, repeat, ..
I feel very confident that I can do that now, for me that confidence came from no longer using my 'alcoholism' as an excuse to keep me from deciding to quit, for good.

Soberwolf

Hi GC

Gonnachange

I'm assuming that you meant steak not streak. I'm old enough to remember when streaking was a fad, but I can assure you that clothes will be worn while cooking and subsequently eating dinner. :-)

Awareness is a biggie and while I do have some situational triggers that I'm in the process of getting past I've also noticed that I'm more susceptible to a poor decision when I'm either hungry or tired. Angry or lonely don't seem to have any influence.

It very well may come to that, but I'm not there yet. The declarative statement of, "I don't drink." appeals to me and, for the most part, has been effective. Obviously not 100%, but the things are definitely moving in the right direction. As always EndGame, thank you for your input.

I totally agree.

Thanks about dinner. My beverage of choice tonight, as it usually is, is going to be club soda. Afterward I'm going to take my cues from my son and then do some reading before hitting the hay. My wife has an adult school furniture repair class tonight, but she'll be home early enough for the three of us to hang out. Unlike last night, I'm fully committed to sobriety.

Soberwolf

Sending best wishes for your Fil GC