Oswin

Day 12, 6.38 am here been trying to get back to sleep for about 4 hours. Instead I've layed awake with my mind racing worrying about anything and everything. Wishing I could just have a a few drinks and stop my mind buzzing. I work shifts and kids off school this week so at least can attempt a few more hours.

My mums 70th birthday today got relatives coming over from Ireland and a party tomorrow. Most of my family and friends are drinkers. My mum gave up drinking about 4 years ago due to medication she was on, so least I won't be the only one sober. Just going to concentrate on making it a nice time for her and ignore the part of me that wants to use this as an excuse to get very drunk.

Feeling a bit isolated and alone as don't really have any non drinking friends, my whole life has revolved around drinking in one way or the other.

Whilst laying awake tonight was thinking of giving up drinking like a break up. We had some good times, but then they turned very bad and now it's a destructive relationship. Also was thinking if sober me met drunk me they would hate each other - if that makes sense.

Anyhow now I've got that off my chest going to attempt some sleep

Gardennerd

Yes, the racing brain always keeps me up. I'm trying to fall asleep here (11pm). Thinking of nothing helps. Nature shows work too. I have a bunch saved on the DVR. The narrators voice makes me nod off usually.

Soberwolf

Good getting it off your chest Oswin

Reading helps to tire my eyes hope you get some rest bud

Thepatman

You have a a great opportunity to spend quality time with your mom and built some solid sober memories with her.

I was drunk most of my adult life. I have absolutely no sober memories with my late mom. I am not one to dwell on the past and things I cannot change, but if I could do one thing in the past, I would spend sober time with my mum.

So rock on, have fun at the party, and just be sober. Your allowed to be silly and have fun. Walk around with a nice sober smile,

Don't ever forget that your awesome!!

trachemys

Does your mum know you've quit? Since she'll feel those cravings too, let her know. Whenever you get a craving, go give her hand a squeeze.

Oswin

I was drunk most of my adult life. I have absolutely no sober memories with my late mom. I am not one to dwell on the past and things I cannot change, but if I could do one thing in the past, I would spend sober time with mum [/QUOTE]

That is a really good point, most of my adult memories with my mum we were both drunk or I was. Be nice to both be sober and remember it! Thanks

Oswin

Yes she knows, she's the one person who can relate to me. She says she doesn't miss it now, although she never drank as much as me. She will definitely be supportive though thanks x