Nofearnobeer

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Need a solution , a perspective adjustment or a swift kick in the britches!

3 Months and I am even driving myself crazy....I completely lack the energy , ambition and motivation to even do the things that I WANT TO DO??

I love turning wrenching on bikes , woodworking , playing guitar and working on my gun collection.

I have 4 bikes downstairs that I need to fix , a bunch of shelves and cabinets to build in the shop , a brand new Fender Mustang AMP and at least 3 guns to clean and adjust...

This doesn't include my wife's Honey-do list , which mainly involves hanging tons of pictures and curtains at this point..

I don't have the ambition or energy to do any of them...Before I quit in November , I'd would've had all this done in 2 weeks time...

Am I missing something?? Because I am driving myself nutz... :\

Thepatman

I understand what you mean I have the same energy issue at 6+ weeks.

But I trust the good folks here that all report that their energy levels came back at some point. Put your trust in them as well.

Nofearnobeer

Thanks Patman...Just didn't know if this is the new normal , because if so , that would suck... :\

Joe Nerv

I don't know anything about you, so this might not apply, BUT...

I'm noticing a lot lately on this forum (been reading more than posting these days) that a good number of people seem to think if they put the drink down their lives are going to get better. With some people, those who's alcohol problem didn't run too deep, that might very well be the case. With those who drank alcoholically (I know, tough to define, and debatable), or drank like I did and couldn't stop, putting down the drink is only the first small step. If that's not followed up by a course of action to change the person that needed to drink, there's little hope of things getting better. They usually get worse.

There are a handful of solutions out there. Lots of people here with experience in ones I only know little about. I do know however that the solution offered by AA, the 12 steps, works. It has for me, and everyone else I know who has truly incorporated them in their life. I'm sober longer than I ever dreamed imaginable, and have accomplished things that weren't even on my radar. If I had ONLY put the drink down without taking any other action, I'm 99.9% certain I'd be dead. Staying happily sober for me meant, and still means at times, forcing myself to do things that cut against my grain. Learning different things, opening my mind to new possibilities.

A kick in the britches from me would be to get your butt to an AA meeting, whether you want to or not. If for some reason that's completely out of the question, I'd reconsider , or find another program that will help you in your journey. The first few years lay the foundation. For me, it was important to have a rock solid one.

Wishin you the best .

Thepatman

Your Welcome. I drank like a fish everyday for 20 years. Logic dictates that it will most likely take a little while for my body to heal. LOL!

tate9685

Sounds like spending some time with other sober people in AA fellowship would be very beneficial. You could give it a try. Some folks get the winter blues too. There could be a number of reasons. Don't be too quick to pin this on sobriety. Our addictive voices want us to drink so maybe yours is trying to convince you to return?

strategery

Nofear, I think we both have just about the same continuous sobriety time. I wanted to let you know I struggle with this as well. I think it may just be part of the recovery process and take some time to where we both have to be patient.

Nofearnobeer

Now this is some very good insightful information here.... Hmmm....And Tate , you might just be on to something....It's just hard to think that the "voice" would overrun my hobbies and interest like this...

I need to learn to be patient I guess....And from what i can see , being patient is a whole lot better than being A PATIENT..

AA may be worth a shot...we'll see how it goes...

Thanks ya'll ..

Axiom

I really like this quote.

I'm around the same sober time as you and know exactly what you mean.

Personally, I have found that if I do things right when I get up I am more motivated for the day. It took me a while but it seems that I set my pace for the day pretty early.

What kind of woodwork do you do? I just bought a book on woodcarving and want to get into it. I really just want to be an expert whittler but we will see what comes of it.

Nofearnobeer

I used to design and build customer furniture , mainly Mission Oak style ..

I am trying to regain the shop equipment to start again..I am mostly there...

headcase1

Ditto right here! I keep blaming it on the cold here in Wisconsin, but maybe that's just a conveinant excuse. I can't wait to ride motorcycle or get in my jon boat but it's just too cold to ice fish, I can't take the cold like when I was younger.

Nofearnobeer

I'm with ya! It'll be in the teens by tomorrow in N. GA ...Single digit windchills...I can't stand the cold weather! Need my 90's back!

Anna

That sounds like a good thing to work on. I agree these feelings will not last forever, and it's possible that your AV is trying to convince you life is boring. When I felt lost early on, I sat down and wrote a list of things I wanted/needed to accomplish and each day I would cross off one or two things. It really helped me mentally to believe I was moving forward.

Axiom

Ha, to cold to ice fish. Just that statement makes me cold.

I am ready for the spring for sure. Not sure about the 90's though. D.C. is a swamp, the humidity is insanely thick when we get up there.

Sweet, what kind of bike do you have? I bet there is some wide open riding in Wisconsin.
I had a little Harley sportster from 16-20. My moms old bike. I had to sell it to pay for a lawyer when I got a DUI.

Jen73

Hi NFNB,

It sounds like you are pretty busy over there, with all your unfinished bikes, woodworking, pictures and so on...

I think it is good that you have hobbies and other things need to be done around the house. I would start doing a project that is easy like hanging pictures on the walls. Then you can decide what needs to be done next after your done with one project.

Take one thing at a time, you will notice that time isn't everything, when you see you can get 2-3 projects done in one day.

You can do this.... 3 months is good!! I cant wait when i reach that!!

Fly N Buy

Hi Nofear - glad you're here!

When I drank, I completed a lot of task oriented stuff in a manic manner - I would decide to do a project and bam! At it!

Part of this in retrospect was I think a justification in my own mind for drinking. Look what I did! I must not be a drunk!?!?

As I got sober, I felt blah....... did not want to tackle anything. It took awhile.

A couple things I learned from others here and elsewhere that helped kick start my behind was start small. I would clean a drawer out in the shop, or organize the work bench - I'd pick things I could accomplish in an hour or less and be done.

I found doing any large scale things became very frustrating as I didn't have the manic drive that booze infusion provided this behavior had dissipated. At 8+ months I now daily to a lot of small things - make the bed every morning, take better care of my daily hygiene, clean out the car regularly, do my laundry on a timely basis etc.

It may sound too simplistic, but has created a level of more discipline in my life that are building blocks and allows me to plan and execute larger, badly needed projects.

I listened to a gent the other day talk about how when we drank most of our decisions where based on emotional responses and unplanned. In sobriety we start to again use our intellect and not run everything on emotions. He refers to this as I(ntellect) over E(motion) and not the other way around. I found value in what he said.

Anyway, glad you're with us today - those are some things I went thru and what I have experienced. Small bites when we eat anything larger than our own heads

Nofearnobeer

Thanks Jen!! That is good advice...

Axiom , I ride a 05 KLR250 , I prefer playing in the dirt , but it makes for a good commuter bike...

Nofearnobeer

Thanks FlynBuy ....It's great to hear other folks have gone through the same thing...I was starting to think I was nutz (more nutz than usual) ....Yer right about that Infusion part...

I keep thinking "I love doing this , but I don't want to do this right now!" ...

Fly N Buy

We are all on the same journey - we'll get there together!
If you love knowing what you like, that's great. A common part of the disease -- part of the ism - is really having no idea who we are or what we like.

Heard a friend in the rooms who has tenured sobriety say when she got sober, she had no idea what she liked. Do I like chicken or steak?? I know exactly what she went thru.....

Keep us posted man!

Ruby2

I used to go gangbusters on projects when I was still drinking. Now that I've been sober for a bit, not quite so much.

What has worked for me is to pick one thing and focus on that. You have a whole lot of projects/interests going on. When I have that many to do or think about it causes some anxiety. Which is a favorite tactic of the AV.

Start small. Start simple. Prioritize.

You're coming along. Keep going.