If you are new here - read this
Headed in the right direction.
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Las Vegas
Posts: 257
If you are new here - read this
For me, I'm a (if I say so myself) young looking, professional.
YET...Alcohol was a big problem. The soultion is only somewhat simple. It is that I can NEVER take another drink. Of course, there are other problems to solve, like filling in the gap of what to do during the times I used to drink...and fixing the problems that made me want to drink. I have a lot to loose (job, clean driving record, husband, child, money, home, car) and fear is a big motivator.
I fit a lot of the profile, but not all. (Of one test of 20 questions, I answered yes to 15 questions - and the scoring went like: 1 yes = maybe a problem, 2 yes = probably a problem, 3 yes = an alcoholic for sure. Hmmmmm....15 yes.....(anyone home?)
I never had DUI and I don't get cravings, and I'm not jobless, homeless, or smelly. BUT like I heard recently, we (with a problem) are all on the same bus, but we get off at different times.
AND...Like I say, being alcoholic isn't a job interview where I had to look a certain way to fit the image before I was hired. It was the internal conditions that are created (ALL BEYOND MY CONTROL) by the pure chemistry of it all. Jeesh, what a relief to find out that it wasn't simply a matter of me failing to exercise restraint / unable to have just one glass of wine.
As I look back, I could name times when it was occurring years ago. I didn't see it then. Recently I wondered, does everyone know but me? Did all my friends WISH I wouldn't drink so much, but just didn't say anything? It is comforting to know that most didn't think I was acting foolishly.
BUT, I MUST take total responsibility for my condition now that I know about it. I have to stick by the #1 rule now. Not one sip. I can't get drunk if I don't start. Could I have one glass of wine right now and stop. Maybe, if you sat me down at a table and said "one and one only" and policed the situation...I wouldn't wrestle the bottle away from you....BUT next week, without the rule in place, I'd be buzzed off my ass....downward spiral after that, feeling like SH*T. The simplist way to put is it that I literally got burnt out on booze.
I don't drink.
Acutally, it is safer to be around me now. I'm less likely to embarass myself and my friends!!! I can get more done! When I say something, I'll remember it! ;-) Life is better now.
Carrie - alcoholic 25 days sober
YET...Alcohol was a big problem. The soultion is only somewhat simple. It is that I can NEVER take another drink. Of course, there are other problems to solve, like filling in the gap of what to do during the times I used to drink...and fixing the problems that made me want to drink. I have a lot to loose (job, clean driving record, husband, child, money, home, car) and fear is a big motivator.
I fit a lot of the profile, but not all. (Of one test of 20 questions, I answered yes to 15 questions - and the scoring went like: 1 yes = maybe a problem, 2 yes = probably a problem, 3 yes = an alcoholic for sure. Hmmmmm....15 yes.....(anyone home?)
I never had DUI and I don't get cravings, and I'm not jobless, homeless, or smelly. BUT like I heard recently, we (with a problem) are all on the same bus, but we get off at different times.
AND...Like I say, being alcoholic isn't a job interview where I had to look a certain way to fit the image before I was hired. It was the internal conditions that are created (ALL BEYOND MY CONTROL) by the pure chemistry of it all. Jeesh, what a relief to find out that it wasn't simply a matter of me failing to exercise restraint / unable to have just one glass of wine.
As I look back, I could name times when it was occurring years ago. I didn't see it then. Recently I wondered, does everyone know but me? Did all my friends WISH I wouldn't drink so much, but just didn't say anything? It is comforting to know that most didn't think I was acting foolishly.
BUT, I MUST take total responsibility for my condition now that I know about it. I have to stick by the #1 rule now. Not one sip. I can't get drunk if I don't start. Could I have one glass of wine right now and stop. Maybe, if you sat me down at a table and said "one and one only" and policed the situation...I wouldn't wrestle the bottle away from you....BUT next week, without the rule in place, I'd be buzzed off my ass....downward spiral after that, feeling like SH*T. The simplist way to put is it that I literally got burnt out on booze.
I don't drink.
Acutally, it is safer to be around me now. I'm less likely to embarass myself and my friends!!! I can get more done! When I say something, I'll remember it! ;-) Life is better now.
Carrie - alcoholic 25 days sober
Member
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Nebraska
Posts: 423
Carrie, I am an alcoholic and literally proud of it (now that I am sober) - is anyone perfect?
I think I could have written your initial post and I feel the same way. I sometimes think about situations in the past where I wonder now if people were thinking "he has a problem with alcohol!"
I am also a fairly young professional with an advanced degree and have a lot to live for and I have been sober for over ten months.
I guess what I am saying is that over time your thought process will shift from the past to the present and future. My senses are much more heightened now and I feel a lot sharper and confident at work as well. I believe alcohol can hold us down and eventually would do serious damage - our luck would someday run out. In reality, that and my relationships were the main reasons I wanted to get help to fight this disease.
Interesting to learn about the biochemical aspects of the disease, isn't it? No we are not "bad" people after all! And about that one drink - do not ever do it. I have looked at some research that suggests that alcoholics cannot drink, at all - or risk relapse - that goes for the nonalcoholic beer and wine as well.
Congratulations Carrie - I can tell you will be successful because you are focused and have accepted that we are alcoholics. As far as I am concerned, that is half the battle!!
Dave
I think I could have written your initial post and I feel the same way. I sometimes think about situations in the past where I wonder now if people were thinking "he has a problem with alcohol!"
I am also a fairly young professional with an advanced degree and have a lot to live for and I have been sober for over ten months.
I guess what I am saying is that over time your thought process will shift from the past to the present and future. My senses are much more heightened now and I feel a lot sharper and confident at work as well. I believe alcohol can hold us down and eventually would do serious damage - our luck would someday run out. In reality, that and my relationships were the main reasons I wanted to get help to fight this disease.
Interesting to learn about the biochemical aspects of the disease, isn't it? No we are not "bad" people after all! And about that one drink - do not ever do it. I have looked at some research that suggests that alcoholics cannot drink, at all - or risk relapse - that goes for the nonalcoholic beer and wine as well.
Congratulations Carrie - I can tell you will be successful because you are focused and have accepted that we are alcoholics. As far as I am concerned, that is half the battle!!
Dave
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