fastfocus

hi all, don't really come on here much, im one of those who feels I don't fit in well (not on here, I mean I feel like that with everywhere/everything)

I just keep feeling down and really struggle to do anything

I been going to aa meets 7 nights a week, but I cant afford to, I live in the sticks and got to drive to meetings

im spending as much on fuel as I did booze

im coming up 5 months (provided I make it to the end of the month)

but I just got no umph about me

I have other issues aswell as alcohol, but im getting cbt therapy for those, not that its helping much yet, its early days I think

basically every morning I wake up, I feel really really low in mood, I don't want to get up, (I don't work) eventually I get up and I suppose I do feel better as the day goes on, but it has its low points, sort of ok - low, no real highs, if I have fuel in my car etc and know im going to aa I sort of look forwards to that, but I cant do that everyday as I need to keep money back for other stuff, bills, food, savings,

im waffling, and obviously im not at aa today, and feel down

probally a silly question but does it go away ???? I want to feel ""normal""

MyShadow

I live in the "sticks" as well. I dont attend AA, only 7 days sober. Hows your diet? I am staying crazy busy reading this sight and relating my experience to others. Your not alone, I never knew all of our stories are so much a like. So there is plenty here that are feeling or have felt the same way. Hang in there.

fastfocus

hi, my diet is ok, maybe not healthy lol, but I eat ok and eat meals at meal times etc,

MyShadow

Answered your PM.

aldo1981

Hi ff try to stay focused on the future I know that May seem hard but the feelings improve,you are felling low because your body has now had to go it alone with ought the alcohol. I have had the exact same issues with my feelings low , anxiousness and just feeling crap but it gets better you are doing well staying sober remember that and give yourself some credit. Fitting in is only part of life and more often it is because we don't share the same interests you are in the right place here you fit perfect everyone on this site has had or has the same issues you feel so hang around there are a lot of great people and story's to help you ,,

Soberwolf

Awesome job on 5 months

Could you use public transportation to get to mtns to save cash ?

How far are you travelling have you got a where to find book for mtns ?

Some of my friends have had Cbt and they said it really helped

it wont be overnight success it will take time as you said early days it will get better bud

glad your here your not waffling it does go away but it takes work & time your doing that my advice would be keep up the good work !!

fastfocus

I priced the bus up its dearer than what I put in fuel, but that's a day return, maybe a week pass might be cheaper, but I love driving I think its that , that, makes it a little more exiting for me, as I love cars, plus I can come and go as I please,

yeah where to find, I just use internet for that, im doing average 40 mile round trip to meetings, some are futher some slightly nearer,

I was a lager drinker and just bought cases of it, especially when on offer, so im deffo using same if not more on fuel, if I go 7 days a week,

its just the days I don't go I just get so down, so bored, cause I cant get out of the low mood to actually do things I like

plus my other issues hold me back, but hope ill get something out of my cbt soon

fastfocus

yeah thanks, I found it just after I pm you lol

RedneckRoo

Its easier to stay in the moment even if by the second. Congrats on coming up on 5 months. no sense in being down about it. thats a heck of an accomplishment. You should be proud and ask yourself when was last time you managed to get that many days in a row sober and clear thinking? Thats a good journey and even though the road has its bumps and potholes along the path it is well worth the drive. It has many blessings not only sober. The poem Yesterday Today and Tomorrow comes to mind as well as the promises in the big book see what the future holds with your journey if you stay on the path as you been doing.

Congrats

FreeOwl

I can relate....

"Sometimes, I don't feel like I 'fit in'
And then other times I remember
Just why it is
That I really don't want to

Celebrate your awkward!

Embrace your outsider!

Be your own weirdo...."


Normal? I don't know. Do we ever feel 'normal'. What IS 'normal'?

But I can tell you I felt like you're describing for many months - a few good days here and there but a predominant blah plaguing me. What I did was keep on going, find One Good Thing every time I felt down, focused on the goodness I could find and held faith that what I was feeling wasn't going to last forever and that the process would lead me in the direction of better.

And that did happen.....

Hang in there.

Soberwolf

Are any of these closer than 40 miles that is a lot of travel & fuel

Find a Meeting | AA Meetings | Alcoholics Anonymous (Great Britain) Ltd

mavrick

Hi fast focus, nice to meet you. Do you have a hobby?
I find ive started doing the things I used to love before alcohol took it all away.

Stoogy

I think feeling low is perfectly normal, once we go through the physical aspects of sobrietry we tend to think of it as job done, but the psychological aspects take a bit longer but you will get there.

Well done.

Anna

I'm really sorry you're feeling down. Firstly, congratulations on 5 months sober. I think it's good you are going to a therapist and hopefully it will help. Have you made other changes in your life since stopping drinking? Have you added any enjoyable, fun activities for example? You might also consider talking to your dr. Depression could be a possibility that your dr could help with.

Kris47

Focus,

Congrats on your 5 months of sobriety! That is no small thing! Things will get better given time. The problem with most of us alcoholics is we want it now, if not yesterday! I always felt "different", too. My first sober months I too was feeling blue and depressed. Flat Lined. Drinking afterall messed with our brain. It will take some time to begin feeling better. Perhaps talking with your doctor and maybe an antidepressant could help short term. Don't give up. Better days are ahead for you. I think I started feeling a lot better nearing my one year.

JadedGirl

Well done on 5 months that's huge ...hope u feel a bit better xx

Creekryder

I'm a nutrition freak, so of course I will recommend eating healthier foods. And take a supplement, especially B complex. Take some walks and think about how better off you are being sober. If you don't see that now, continued reflection will eventually bring it into focus. Lastly, get plenty of sleep. That does wonders for the disposition. Five months is awesome, my friend. Revel in the accomplishment and know you're winning the battle.

Shamus

Yes you will definitely feel better. Exercise helps me a lot in that situation.

sugarbear1

have you worked those steps?

Yankees2015

Five months, what an accomplishment! I know the fuel seems to equate to the booze costs, but I've found - just in the 10 measly days I've been sober, that it's not just the bottle cost that's saving me money. I am not getting specific (greasy) food cravings and spending on take out when I have food at home. Nor am I spending on buzzed impulse buys. I also would misplace things here and there and need to buy to replace them (and find the original eventually-ugh) and that has ceased.

Please stay on this path and I'm truly (happily) envious of your 5 months!!