1st sober party !!! Well - that was interesting .... I'm not who I thought I was !!
 

Hi there everyone,

Just thought I'd do a quick post.
It's 15mins after midnight here in Scotland ... and I've just come in from a house party that I was invited to....

Jeezo - it's very interesting sitting watching everyone when you're sober.....
Even more interesting - is everyone looking at me !!! Waiting !!!! For me to get on the table & start dancing, or for me to start swiging the wine out of the bottle, or for me to do some other thing that everyone can laugh at "look at Shenzy .... good old Shenzy, she never lets us down, she's such a laugh when she's drunk" !!!

It didn't happen .... so instead, I got various comments thrown at me

"come on and have a real drink"
"my god, you're such a woose"
"you're so quiet when you're sober"
"it's boring when you're sober"
"just have a drink & leave your car"
"life's too short to stop drinking...."

I feel mentally exhausted .... I felt very out of place !!! If it wasn't for another 2 people there, who were sober & driving, I would have been at a complete loss ....... :a108:
I sat like a wee mouse with the other 2 sober folks .... I could barely strike up a conversation with anyone ..... I thought I would have been a bit more outgoing.......

Anyhow - It won't be me waking up with a stinking hangover in the morning. Thank god.
xxxx

Great job on pushing through, fantastic stuff!! :scoregood

I would however, if it was me, give the parties a miss for a while, all of that stress and energy is not something you need to put yourself through, if people are going to give you hassle, is it really that enjoyable? because it doesn't sound like it was much fun.

Keep pushing through!! :)

hey well done good for you......lived in aberdeen for a couple of years on my 10th day sober its worth it so worth it.....

Sounds like you've done really well. Congrats on not letting anyone force you to drink. Must have been tough with all those comments being thrown at you. Great job Shenzy!

Good job! I am sure it will get easier saying that you stopped drinking over time. You have inspired me that you can say no at parties. I have one coming up with some friends who really love to drink. So I am sure that I will be in a similar situation soon enough.

Things like this get easier the longer you don't drink.
I promise!

For me I actually realised at things like this, not everyone drank like I did. Some had one or two drinks. The one's that went totally overboard stood out like a sore thumb as well!

I wish you the best xx

Well done! Wow that sounds tough Shenzy. Maybe they are your friends and you can't get out of it, but it certainly sounds like a group you should limit your contact with....believe me, i've been the only one not drinking and have gotten some flack, and know how it feels to be the only one not sauced at a party, but a night like that would make me think long and hard about going the next time that group got together....

Change happens gradually :)

In time I think you'll integrate the best parts of the old Shenzy with the new.
Thats what happened to me anyway.

I also found myself shying away from those parties where the man objective was to drink until you fall down. There's nothing in that for me, now.

You may find a lot of those critical contemptuous people won't be in your life for much longer either, and that's good too - frees you up for finding people who really genuinely like the real you :)

D

Proud of you Shenzy. I agree with Dee, the old and new Shenzys will merge and make one great person. :) Yes, it'll be lovely to wake up clear headed and rested - no headache, no regrets.

isn't it amazing how stupid the conversations are. I have been to many a party since I quit drinking which was many years ago. I found it so boring. I could talk and socialize in the beginning and then as the booze flowed I would always loose contact with whomever I had found to talk to as they turned from an intelligent interesting person into a slobbering idiot who no longer made any sense.

Then I find myself isolated and isolating as I withdraw into a corner and amuse myself by people watching. I tried to keep up with opiates but its not the same thing and I still ended up in the corner staring.

Now its best to just not go.

Some I have to go to as they are the company xmas party and the company summer picnic. At least in the summer gathering there are lots of children that have to go home early and my wife and I fit into the exiting group.

Shenzy stand tall and be proud of who you are.

I love people-watching with a nice clear sober mind.

More power to you Shenzy!

I would have been so mad at the comments you posted.... and be looking for other things to do with my time. I can't think of any response I would have had from each and every comment you quoted below, but F U... i have had this a couple of times from some people, and we no longer speak. I don;t need their choice to be like that influence me in any way.


"come on and have a real drink"
"my god, you're such a woose"
"you're so quiet when you're sober"
"it's boring when you're sober"
"just have a drink & leave your car"
"life's too short to stop drinking...."

this is the bs my Av tells me. Sure, do it, it' ok! F. U. av... just no, been down that road.

I am glad you made it through. IMO, find other people to hang out with.

And I agree with Hevyn. And I'll bet that the merged Shenzy will have the time of her life in sobriety.

You did a great job! I remember my first party in October. It was such a relief to not have to keep an eye on the booze to make sure others weren't drinking it all. Also no worries about drinking six times more than any one person. Also noticed that everybody nursed two beers over four hours! What the heck?

Thank you everyone for your responses.....
Definitely glad I've woke with a clear head this morning - my daughter has been awake since 4 this morning with a terrible cough - (it's 7.30am now).....I'm pretty sure a lot of folks who were at the party have only been in bed a couple of hours.....

It was an interesting evening ..... I doubt it'll be one I'll repeat anytime soon.

A few folks just had a couple of drinks.....but I'd say the majority were knocking it back....many were stotting around .... by the time I left - 4 were cuddling (I love you-you're my best friend - and all that), 2 were crying and the noise of everyone shouting over the top of one another was shocking...

I had no av last night at all ..... infact, if anything, it just reinforced why I don't drink.....and I'm very happy I don't drink.

xxx

Well done on getting through it. It's always an eye opener to me....And hard work! I was usually 10 times worse than anyone at party's!

Waking up hangover free while everyone nurses a hangover saying how terrible they feel....I just thank god it's not me anymore.

You got through it!

First wanted to post because I love your avatar whoever that sweet thing is (I have a westie & a Scottie).

Second, give it time. Socializing becomes easier and more natural over time. I have a very rich social life but it no longer includes many alcohol driven parties. And if by chance I find myself at one I don't stay longer than to say my hellos and then quickly make my exit.

Your so awesome my fellow scot !!

Congrats ShenzyT

Well done you! you were not boring at all, you were witnessing your friends go from being normal, to very very drunk, and the wanted to involve you in this. It is an eyeopener isnt it when you see the changes yourself, and i bet the thought crossed your mind.."That used to be me".. well, it is not you anymore and give yourself a huge pat on the back. I have witnessed this too, can be quite amusing, and they will do anything to encourage you to drink. Go Shenzy!:abcq::shine8pl: ps you cant be outgoing with drunken people.

I love people watching too.