I want to get sober...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 18
I want to get sober...
Hi,
My name is Grace. I'm an alcoholic.... 20 years ago, I got sober and stayed sober for almost 5 years. One day, I quit going to AA meetings. I went to a wedding and drank one glass of champagne and never looked back. I've been binge drinking off and on for the last 20 years.
I'm married. I drink in secret, when I'm alone. I was drinking vodka every day, hiding it from my husband in the lowest drawer of the freezer. One day, I hit a culvert and my tire went flat. My husband said, "You must have hit something..... There is a cut in the side of the tire." I said, "Did I?" That day, I admitted I was powerless over vodka.... but, could still drink wine and beer....
I have a high stress job and have been drinking wine every day for the last four months when I get home. It started with one to two glasses. I am up to at least a bottle daily. On the weekend, I begin drinking at breakfast and drink all day. Yesterday, I stopped and bought a bottle of wine and drank it on the way to work.
I am craving alcohol every day. My husband never says a word, but I know he wonders what is going on. I'm late coming home because I have to stop and buy another bottle at the grocery.
I have been hanging around the forums here just reading. I would tell myself that I am different and could still drink.
Yesterday, drinking on the job caused me to accept that I really am powerless over alcohol. I have come to this forum to ask for help in getting sober. This post is my first attempt at being honest about my drinking.
Thank you for being here... and thank you for listening.
My name is Grace. I'm an alcoholic.... 20 years ago, I got sober and stayed sober for almost 5 years. One day, I quit going to AA meetings. I went to a wedding and drank one glass of champagne and never looked back. I've been binge drinking off and on for the last 20 years.
I'm married. I drink in secret, when I'm alone. I was drinking vodka every day, hiding it from my husband in the lowest drawer of the freezer. One day, I hit a culvert and my tire went flat. My husband said, "You must have hit something..... There is a cut in the side of the tire." I said, "Did I?" That day, I admitted I was powerless over vodka.... but, could still drink wine and beer....
I have a high stress job and have been drinking wine every day for the last four months when I get home. It started with one to two glasses. I am up to at least a bottle daily. On the weekend, I begin drinking at breakfast and drink all day. Yesterday, I stopped and bought a bottle of wine and drank it on the way to work.
I am craving alcohol every day. My husband never says a word, but I know he wonders what is going on. I'm late coming home because I have to stop and buy another bottle at the grocery.
I have been hanging around the forums here just reading. I would tell myself that I am different and could still drink.
Yesterday, drinking on the job caused me to accept that I really am powerless over alcohol. I have come to this forum to ask for help in getting sober. This post is my first attempt at being honest about my drinking.
Thank you for being here... and thank you for listening.
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: US East Coast
Posts: 1,972
Hi Grace,
Welcome to SR. You were sober for five years before, so you know that you can do this! SR is a good support tool for interacting with others who are going through the same thing.
Are you planning to return to AA?
Welcome to SR. You were sober for five years before, so you know that you can do this! SR is a good support tool for interacting with others who are going through the same thing.
Are you planning to return to AA?
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,776
Welcome to the family. 
We are here to give support and share our experience to help you get sober for good. Have you considered going back to AA? They don't shoot their wounded, you know. 
We are here to give support and share our experience to help you get sober for good. Have you considered going back to AA? They don't shoot their wounded, you know. 
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,560
Welcome Grace - it's wonderful to have you with us.
I have a similar story. I was once sober for 3 yrs. & allowed myself to have a glass of wine on a date. I didn't even give it much thought. The glass of wine turned into many that night. Nothing bad happened so I figured I could go ahead. Seven years later my life was destroyed - I had dui's - I was drinking all day, even at work. That's when I found SR and the courage to change my life. Not being alone makes all the difference - and we are here to help.
I have a similar story. I was once sober for 3 yrs. & allowed myself to have a glass of wine on a date. I didn't even give it much thought. The glass of wine turned into many that night. Nothing bad happened so I figured I could go ahead. Seven years later my life was destroyed - I had dui's - I was drinking all day, even at work. That's when I found SR and the courage to change my life. Not being alone makes all the difference - and we are here to help.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Chattanooga TN
Posts: 596
Welcome Grace, you are among friends here. There is much help, understanding, and compassion in these pages.
AA indeed seem to work for you before, perhaps start there for face to face support. It seems you very much want sobriety to be your life again and this site and AA are both good opportunities for that.
AA indeed seem to work for you before, perhaps start there for face to face support. It seems you very much want sobriety to be your life again and this site and AA are both good opportunities for that.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Kentuckiana
Posts: 15
I can relate to the secrecy of your addiction, as well as convincing myself that I can still use, just not certain drugs. Feeling alone is the worst. You should go back to those AA meetings that helped you in the past, and if not those, maybe some other recovery program.
It's funny that I should even say that because I have yet to go to a meeting.
Be honest with your husband, but not until you feel ready. It was very scary for me to tell my best friend my biggest secret (and she really doesn't know the extent of it) but people can surprise you with the support they can surround you with.
But you have to be ready. I was two weeks sober before I felt enough momentum to tell someone very close to me... I know I didn't want to tell her and then the next day avoid her for a week because I was bingeing.
I'm recently sober as well and feel for your situation. I hope to hear from you again
It's funny that I should even say that because I have yet to go to a meeting.
Be honest with your husband, but not until you feel ready. It was very scary for me to tell my best friend my biggest secret (and she really doesn't know the extent of it) but people can surprise you with the support they can surround you with.
But you have to be ready. I was two weeks sober before I felt enough momentum to tell someone very close to me... I know I didn't want to tell her and then the next day avoid her for a week because I was bingeing.
I'm recently sober as well and feel for your situation. I hope to hear from you again
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,497
Grace, Welcome,
I know how hard it is to admit that you're an alcoholic and that you need to stop drinking. I resisted doing so for too long and alcoholism is a progressive disease and while I resisted, it continued to worsen.
The good news that you can stop drinking and recover. You can be the person you want to be and we are here to support you.
I know how hard it is to admit that you're an alcoholic and that you need to stop drinking. I resisted doing so for too long and alcoholism is a progressive disease and while I resisted, it continued to worsen.
The good news that you can stop drinking and recover. You can be the person you want to be and we are here to support you.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Ny
Posts: 739
Welcome Grace...
I am only on day 3 but have a very similar story. sober for 5 years with AA, then did it on my own, then picked upa and have been drinking daily (also in the AM) for a few years. HIding from my husband and kids is brutal! I finally had to sto after a disasterous incident FRiday. I am not going back to AA and was reluctant to post here. This weekend was great/ I posted often and I am beginnng to feel connected. Stick around and keep posting.
Remember how great and freeing sobriety was???? Being honest feels terrific..having your husband trust you is awesome!
I look forward to connecting with you here. WE can all do this with support from eachother. Stay close and have a great day!!
I am only on day 3 but have a very similar story. sober for 5 years with AA, then did it on my own, then picked upa and have been drinking daily (also in the AM) for a few years. HIding from my husband and kids is brutal! I finally had to sto after a disasterous incident FRiday. I am not going back to AA and was reluctant to post here. This weekend was great/ I posted often and I am beginnng to feel connected. Stick around and keep posting.
Remember how great and freeing sobriety was???? Being honest feels terrific..having your husband trust you is awesome!
I look forward to connecting with you here. WE can all do this with support from eachother. Stay close and have a great day!!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Sydney, Australia
Posts: 11
Welcome Grace,
I am 6 days sober this time. And i went back to AA for the first time in 3 years a couple of days ago. I was welcomed with open arms and they were really happy i made it back.
I need as much help as possible and love that i can come on SR and share with other people who feel the same.
BE kind to yourself and just hang in there, there is lots of lovely people here.
Em
I am 6 days sober this time. And i went back to AA for the first time in 3 years a couple of days ago. I was welcomed with open arms and they were really happy i made it back.
I need as much help as possible and love that i can come on SR and share with other people who feel the same.
BE kind to yourself and just hang in there, there is lots of lovely people here.
Em
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