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A walk through of relapse/slip

Step 1 : Surrender
You listen to the Alcoholic Voice in your head and it seems like a good idea to have a drink, even through you are letting yourself down, betraying your family with your empty promises and letting people on SR who have supported you.

Step 2 : At the Supermarket
You buy 3 bottles of Singha Beer for £5 and go to the checkout to pay. You convince yourself, you will only drink on weekends now and you will be a normal moderated drinker.

Step 3: At home
You sit in your chair and prise off the cap of the beer, you pour into your pint glass and drink it. It feels good. so you take another drink. You love it and finish the bottle. It cant hurt to have another just to ensure a goods nights sleep. Finally you might as well have the last one now.

Step 4: Deceit
You take the bottles to the recycling bin and smash them so they don't look like beer bottles at the bottom. You go inside and rinse your mouth out with Corsydll mouth wash, brush your teeth and go to bed.

Step 5: The Lies
You Wife finds a beer cap and confronts you about your broken promise to quit forever, the glass you left out still smells of beer.

Step 6: Regret
She argues with you and then says she is going to stay with her Mother for a few days to decided what to do. She takes our Son and goes.
Your sat there alone, so you say, I need a drink to pick me up, so you get in the car to the supermarket. On the way a Police car sees you driving eratically and pulls you over. He asks you if you have had anything to drink, you say no and blow into the detector. Its positve, your arrested and taken to the Police Station.
You have to sit in a cell, blow into the official court registered machine. Your charged and have to appear in front of the Magistrate.
The Magistrates notes you have been done before for drink driving and gives you a 12 month suspended sentence and a 12 month ban with £200 court cost.
You walk home.

Step 7: Your choice
You need to attend a meeting on Monday Morning. You have to catch a bus and a train to get there, because your banned from driving. Its cold. Its raining and all of your problems come from drinking. You miss the meeting because the train got in late, contract lost.
Coming home you buy booze from the supermarket, you drink it and call up your Wife telling her how sorry you are. She tells you she has had enough and that your on your own, she want a divorce. No chance of seeing Son again anytime soon.

Step 8. You decide you have no job, no Wife and no Son. Soon they will come for the house and then I will be homeless. I sit in my car, put a garden house in the exhaust and in through the back window.

Step 9. Death/l
I pass out and die.

Step 10: My Son grows up without a Father, this causes him to have issues, he turns to drink for comfort and the Merry-Go-Round starts all over again.

Now I know how my future ends if I drink. Don't Lancashire

Congratulations on day 9, lancashire.

For me, it's critical that I address Step1 before I let it happen, by seeking support, playing the tape to the end, because my life depends on it.

Love this - brilliant post

My life and future hapiness can be solved by simply not drinking, coming on here and posting and sharing the highs and lows of my life and learning and supporting others so that I can be free of once and for all.

I am at the stage today, where if somebody offered me a million pounds to start drinking again and risk my families future, I hope I would turn it down. I would need to turn it down. I am so weak I would probably take the money and keep drinking, but I have come further than I ever thought possible. I just need to keep going, keep fighting and get to a place, where I can be happy without drink. I see the light in the tunnel and have to just keep running towards it a day at a time.

Awesome post Lancashire this is playing out the tape but on the page

Youve prepared yourself as you wisely know there will be hard days and when they happen always reach out

Lancashire i think your doing brilliant bud i know it dont feel like it yet but keep moving towards that light out of the Tunnel

Have a good sober friday and a even better sober weekend

Thanks SoberWolf.

Well done, Lancashire. You are pondering the question, would I drink for a million dollars? I think the realistic way to frame that same question is, would I give my family, home, job, health, and my life for a million dollars? Pretty sure the answer would be no. If I look at it this way, it's easy to make the choice if it's just another intoxication and hangover - would I trade my life for that?

I think you deserve those things, Lancashire, and I also think you can absolutely succeed. I believe in you! Onward!

Well done Lancashire on Day 9! You are doing it and proving it and realize what drinking again will get you.

I agree that the first Step is the most important. Realizing we need to surrender to the fact that we cannot drink.

So proud of you! :c011:

Life and family are way more precious than a bottle of booze! Thanks for the great post and congrats on day 9!! You are doing great, keep fighting, my friend!!!!

Congratulations on Day 9, Lancashire. Your future is yours for the writing. Pick up that pen and starting composing. Make it a successful, satisfying, and beautiful story.

Power on.

Awesome Lancashire your posts are always very insightful.

Thank you and keep it up!

Drinking alcohol has all the temptation for me as drinking a bucket of warm spit. Well maybe less as the spit isn't quite poison. And alcohol certainly is, at least to me.

You can do this, L!!!

I think this could be the tape for many of us, should we choose to relapse.

Thank you for the post, Lancashire. I think you're doing very well.

Keep fighting Lancashire

Keep fighting Lancashire

Congrats on day 9 :)

You're doing grand.

Thanks for your post! I needed to read that today. It's reality for all of us if we keep drinking. I'm having a hard day myself...that AV is whispering in my ear. :-(

Fight it, girl!!!! You can do this!!