Smoking cannabis leads me to use opiates...
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I can relate. I don't think anyone feels good all the time. I don't think you took fentanyl (not sure what that is) because you felt lacklustre but because you are addicted to altering how you feel. As long as you are unwilling to accept not feeling the way you want to feel, you are in danger of taking drugs. Don't feel guilty, it's a long learning experience. You can do it, just don't give up. How is it going without pot?
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Brokensoul Fentanyl could easily kill you i think you need to try to realise you need to stop now im getting worried
are you taking this IV ?
Brokensoul from what ive just read this stuff its 80-100 times more potent than morphine and many times more potent than heroin
Brokensoul have you considered rehab brother
You got us 24/7 bud you dont need that stuff pls stay with us and keep trying
are you taking this IV ?
Brokensoul from what ive just read this stuff its 80-100 times more potent than morphine and many times more potent than heroin
Brokensoul have you considered rehab brother
You got us 24/7 bud you dont need that stuff pls stay with us and keep trying
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Soberwolf - drug "potency" is a pharmacological concept dependent on dose-response curves. Potency is a way of expressing the affinity a drug has for its receptor as well as its efficacy in producing a biological effect. This can be complex.
Fentanyl is more potent than morphine because it has a higher affinity for its receptor due to its lipophillicity and consequent ability to cross the blood brain barrier. The efficacy of fentanyl vs morphine is difficult to determine as although both are used for pain relief, fentanyl is used mainly to blunt airway reflexes to facilitate tracheal intubation and morphine is 'dirtier' in that has many more side effects. Regardless, they are both full agonists at opiate receptors.
Without going into anymore boring pharmacology, fentanyl has a higher affinity for its receptor than morphine. If efficacy, i.e. the effect the drug-receptor complex has is equal, a lower dose of fentanyl is required to produce an equal response.
10mg morphine is therefore roughly equivelent to 100mcg of fentanyl. If someone took 10mg of fentanyl, they would die. 10mg of morphine is what you would get if you went to hospital with a broken ankle. Remember this is an opiate naive person without tolerance. 100mcg of fentanyl is an induction dose for anaesthesia, again for opiate naive individuals, and this is perfectly safe and very unlikely to stop a healthy, well person from breathing.
I appriciate the concern, but as I said previously, I do low doses of between 50-100. Doing this dose is safe, and remember it's my job to I know about drugs and how they work and how to use them to manipulate human physiology....
I do not have a physical addiction. My problem is in my head and I know that I can stop. I think wacky hit the nail on the head in that I like changing the way I feel almost on demand. I get it, I really do, I have to stop running away from problems and face them..
Fentanyl is more potent than morphine because it has a higher affinity for its receptor due to its lipophillicity and consequent ability to cross the blood brain barrier. The efficacy of fentanyl vs morphine is difficult to determine as although both are used for pain relief, fentanyl is used mainly to blunt airway reflexes to facilitate tracheal intubation and morphine is 'dirtier' in that has many more side effects. Regardless, they are both full agonists at opiate receptors.
Without going into anymore boring pharmacology, fentanyl has a higher affinity for its receptor than morphine. If efficacy, i.e. the effect the drug-receptor complex has is equal, a lower dose of fentanyl is required to produce an equal response.
10mg morphine is therefore roughly equivelent to 100mcg of fentanyl. If someone took 10mg of fentanyl, they would die. 10mg of morphine is what you would get if you went to hospital with a broken ankle. Remember this is an opiate naive person without tolerance. 100mcg of fentanyl is an induction dose for anaesthesia, again for opiate naive individuals, and this is perfectly safe and very unlikely to stop a healthy, well person from breathing.
I appriciate the concern, but as I said previously, I do low doses of between 50-100. Doing this dose is safe, and remember it's my job to I know about drugs and how they work and how to use them to manipulate human physiology....
I do not have a physical addiction. My problem is in my head and I know that I can stop. I think wacky hit the nail on the head in that I like changing the way I feel almost on demand. I get it, I really do, I have to stop running away from problems and face them..
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Join Date: Aug 2014
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Brokensoul no matter what i still think its highly dangerous
Are you still planning to go to the NA mtn in shoreditch saturday ?
Have you contacted your local drug & alcohol team it will be confidential
I understand what your saying but a lot of ppl have died doing the exact same thing
Are you still planning to go to the NA mtn in shoreditch saturday ?
Have you contacted your local drug & alcohol team it will be confidential
I understand what your saying but a lot of ppl have died doing the exact same thing
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Hey wacky,
Thanks for all your comments. I mean everything you've posted seems to resonate with me in some way, your very insightful... Looking back, I started using opaites more frequently when I was doing my A and E rotation with that awful rota. I guess I used them to give me resilience and tolerate working in such conditions, in other words I wanted to change the way I felt.
Today, I didn't need to take fent. In everyday life I put up this front of being slightly out there, bubbly and talkative. I move, talk, and express myself in a unique way. I find out a lot about other people because I'm ashamed of my loneliness. I think the word I'm looking for is that I'm very personable. People see that and like it but I feel unable to take that next step of letting someone know me, ups and downs.... It can get exhausting sometimes que the opiates.
As for weed... I defo want to smoke, esp tonight. I know that I can't smoke just one joint tonight and leave the rest for whenever - I'll end up smoking daily until it's gone which might give a nice buzz in the evening but ultimately, will make me feel awful for days. The cravings are actually easing. I still think that feeling like **** in the morning after smoking weed makes me want to change how I feel and use opiates.
Today was a bad day. They happen.. I can't get into a pattern of catastrophic thinking. Tomorrow is a new day
Thanks for all your comments. I mean everything you've posted seems to resonate with me in some way, your very insightful... Looking back, I started using opaites more frequently when I was doing my A and E rotation with that awful rota. I guess I used them to give me resilience and tolerate working in such conditions, in other words I wanted to change the way I felt.
Today, I didn't need to take fent. In everyday life I put up this front of being slightly out there, bubbly and talkative. I move, talk, and express myself in a unique way. I find out a lot about other people because I'm ashamed of my loneliness. I think the word I'm looking for is that I'm very personable. People see that and like it but I feel unable to take that next step of letting someone know me, ups and downs.... It can get exhausting sometimes que the opiates.
As for weed... I defo want to smoke, esp tonight. I know that I can't smoke just one joint tonight and leave the rest for whenever - I'll end up smoking daily until it's gone which might give a nice buzz in the evening but ultimately, will make me feel awful for days. The cravings are actually easing. I still think that feeling like **** in the morning after smoking weed makes me want to change how I feel and use opiates.
Today was a bad day. They happen.. I can't get into a pattern of catastrophic thinking. Tomorrow is a new day
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i have most of feb off work. I'm going to go on holiday somewhere - something I haven't done in a long time... I've got loads of studying to do and I hope that changing my environment and routine for a while will help me get past this.
As for NA, I will go. I don't think my local drug and alcohol team will be able to give me much help, and I've worked with some of them too...
As for NA, I will go. I don't think my local drug and alcohol team will be able to give me much help, and I've worked with some of them too...
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Join Date: May 2013
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I think it's a great idea to go on a holiday. There will be less pressure to perform hopefully. When I was quitting, I was not having a good time at all and trying to pretend things were normal was difficult. It was only when I accepted this that I stuck with quitting. I had to pay for all the stuff I put in my body and for the joy and freedom that was to come. It is a small price to pay. Honestly, a day, a week, a month, two months of feeling like crap is NOTHING compared to years of addiction behind and potentially ahead, barely a drop in the ocean of time. Discomfort is fine, just sit with it.
As far as everyone thinking you are so happy and great? Well, they would probably be relieved to know you have down times too. I mean, don't the English hate happy people? Sorry - don't shoot me! I'm English too, just a joke. You don't have to drop the act all at once but if you allow yourself to be human and be a bit vulnerable you might find people respond well. I know my friends are delighted when I tell them about my troubles.
As far as everyone thinking you are so happy and great? Well, they would probably be relieved to know you have down times too. I mean, don't the English hate happy people? Sorry - don't shoot me! I'm English too, just a joke. You don't have to drop the act all at once but if you allow yourself to be human and be a bit vulnerable you might find people respond well. I know my friends are delighted when I tell them about my troubles.
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I know people but I don't have any friends. There is no one I can call and ask for support or even to do something with..
I'm off work today - no chance of opiates and I feel fine. Had a lay in, it's around midday. Gonna make a nice breakfast and face the day...
I'm off work today - no chance of opiates and I feel fine. Had a lay in, it's around midday. Gonna make a nice breakfast and face the day...
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I agree Johnston and I guess that is what is happening to me. I am realising my life is superficially together but scratch beneath and I am all over the place. Drugs have allowed me to see another side of myself but now I want to be clean and lead a healthy lifestyle.
I think posting here was not such a good idea and similarly, going to NA etc is prob not for me. I find it hard to let my guard down and I know that I will judged simply because of what I do for a living. Also I have too much to lose.
Posting here has been good in that I have vented some feelings but I think reality is different to what I feel in so many ways..
As such I will not be posting again.
Goodbye
I think posting here was not such a good idea and similarly, going to NA etc is prob not for me. I find it hard to let my guard down and I know that I will judged simply because of what I do for a living. Also I have too much to lose.
Posting here has been good in that I have vented some feelings but I think reality is different to what I feel in so many ways..
As such I will not be posting again.
Goodbye
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I hope you change your mind.
I know that voice. I know how frightening sobriety can appear....many of us decided our addiction was not that bad after all, and that maybe all we needed to do was control it better....
it never gets better br0k3ns0u1 only worse - the longer you leave this the harder it will be.
D
I know that voice. I know how frightening sobriety can appear....many of us decided our addiction was not that bad after all, and that maybe all we needed to do was control it better....
it never gets better br0k3ns0u1 only worse - the longer you leave this the harder it will be.
D
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I have to do this in my own way which means by myself. Everything I have done and probably will do will be on my own and by myself. I don't need and more importantly want preachy people battling their own problems 'giving me advice' which is basically a proxy for them trying to feel better about themselves..
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Join Date: May 2013
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Originally Posted by br0k3ns0u1 
I have to do this in my own way which means by myself. Everything I have done and probably will do will be on my own and by myself. I don't need and more importantly want preachy people battling their own problems 'giving me advice' which is basically a proxy for them trying to feel better about themselves..
Hm, ok... I think it's great that giving each other advice also helps ourselves, mutual benefit. There is a variety of people here with a variety of communication styles and some will annoy you and some will help. I think you're great and maybe just having a rough time. If this site is not for you then I wish you the very best in your journey elsewhere. If you wanna come back, I'd be glad too see you.
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Hi I guess owe you guys an apology. It's all this talk of rehab... I am committed to quitting drugs to lead the life that I want. I will get there...
After quitting cannabis 7 days ago, and taking opiates a couple of days ago, I felt kinda strange. Instead of feeling calm I felt slightly spaced with definite cognitive deficits. I think that not having the cannabis onboard meant that I felt an unopposed opiate effect.
I got really frustrated with all the talk of rehab etc. it's like people think opiates are inherently bad when the reality isfar from it. Sure if you do huge doses and lead the junky lifestyle, things will be bad. But if you can exercise some control I don't think they are any worse than any other drug.
I worked today. No opiates and I feel pretty good about things. I'm getting better sleep and I wake up feeling refreshed although I do still feel a bit fatigued. I feel more motivated to study and build my portfolio. I've got 10 days till I'm off work and plan to exercise, study and eat well throughout that period. I am looking forward to it... I know that if I switch up my routine and be more disciplined I will feel great. Not achieving what I want makes me depressed; having time off will allow me to focus my mind and take things step by step without the pressures of work.
Achieving my goals has made me feel good about myself previously, something I've forgotten off late.
After quitting cannabis 7 days ago, and taking opiates a couple of days ago, I felt kinda strange. Instead of feeling calm I felt slightly spaced with definite cognitive deficits. I think that not having the cannabis onboard meant that I felt an unopposed opiate effect.
I got really frustrated with all the talk of rehab etc. it's like people think opiates are inherently bad when the reality isfar from it. Sure if you do huge doses and lead the junky lifestyle, things will be bad. But if you can exercise some control I don't think they are any worse than any other drug.
I worked today. No opiates and I feel pretty good about things. I'm getting better sleep and I wake up feeling refreshed although I do still feel a bit fatigued. I feel more motivated to study and build my portfolio. I've got 10 days till I'm off work and plan to exercise, study and eat well throughout that period. I am looking forward to it... I know that if I switch up my routine and be more disciplined I will feel great. Not achieving what I want makes me depressed; having time off will allow me to focus my mind and take things step by step without the pressures of work.
Achieving my goals has made me feel good about myself previously, something I've forgotten off late.
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But if you can exercise some control I don't think they are any worse than any other drug.
(I'm not beating up on you - but there's a lot of addiction rationalisation in your posts and I think it's important to challenge that)
In my case, other people can drink without problems. I could not.
I don't hate alcohol, but I accept I have a toxic relationship with it.
Denying that reality led to many decades of pain and suffering.
Finally accepting that relationship led to freedom for me.
D
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Join Date: May 2013
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Good to hear you're feeling a little better. Well done on 7 days no weed! I'm not surprised some of the first symptoms are easing up. I found that my mind would not work properly for several weeks. If I remember right, the anxiety and cognition issues were roaring at me at around 2 - 3 weeks. It was like my addict voice was trying every trick in the book to make me smoke. I managed to ignore it with great difficulty and it gave one last incredible and terrifying roar (panic attacks) before it silenced. I was glad I had this place because without people telling me it was common and that I shouldn't cave in, I probably would have.
There are lots of people here who have been around the block with opiates. You might find more of them in the substance abuse section of the site. I think some people tend to check the forums that relate to their particular drug of choice and they might not see your posts. Not sure if that would help but just letting you know.
I don't think anyone here is going to tell you that any drug is fine though. Actually, that's a lie, some people seem to dismiss weed but I suspect that is because they haven't experienced what it's like to spend their life stoned and really really struggle to change that. I get a bit annoyed when people say that weed is harmless but I ignore those posts and move on. Not everyone is going to understand where you are coming from and it doesn't matter. People are going to say what they think might help, what helped them. It's all good.
There are lots of people here who have been around the block with opiates. You might find more of them in the substance abuse section of the site. I think some people tend to check the forums that relate to their particular drug of choice and they might not see your posts. Not sure if that would help but just letting you know.
I don't think anyone here is going to tell you that any drug is fine though. Actually, that's a lie, some people seem to dismiss weed but I suspect that is because they haven't experienced what it's like to spend their life stoned and really really struggle to change that. I get a bit annoyed when people say that weed is harmless but I ignore those posts and move on. Not everyone is going to understand where you are coming from and it doesn't matter. People are going to say what they think might help, what helped them. It's all good.
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So I came here to find out something specific - I couldn't post on bluelight so go figure... I then specifically said I would use this to bang out my thoughts at a time when I stopped smoking weed which always makes me 'emotional'.
As for 'addiction rationalisation', I mean to descdibe the contempt people hold against opiates when in reality alcohol is much worse for health and society, yet accepted by the masses. Without opiates, modern medicine would not be possible and as such I respect them.
As for control. I don't use daily. I can go without them. I haven't hurt anyone and I dont get withdrawal symptoms.
I think my posts show I have a pretty good handle on my use, the triggers and the underlying causes. The past 10 weeks have been difficult for various reasons - mainly my colleagues enquiring about my personal life, relationship status etc. I know it's coming from a good place but for someone like me, someone with a lot of self reliance, it goes against the identity i have created for myself.
I feel I so much clearer now after a week without cannabis. I mean it's so easy to get into a habit of smoking that stuff daily and putting oneself into a canna-coma.
I'm not interested in addiction as a disease which I think a lot of people on here are. I'm more interested in changing some of my deeply rooted coping strategies that have developed over the course of a lifetime that are not allowing me to lead a fulfilling life at the moment. It took a long time to work out what I liked about opiates because their effects, at low doses, are remarkably subtle. They allow me to be more comfortable in my own skin which makes everything in life easier.
I guess what I am really saying is that I need to improve my self-esteem because clearly taking drugs is not the answer..
As for 'addiction rationalisation', I mean to descdibe the contempt people hold against opiates when in reality alcohol is much worse for health and society, yet accepted by the masses. Without opiates, modern medicine would not be possible and as such I respect them.
As for control. I don't use daily. I can go without them. I haven't hurt anyone and I dont get withdrawal symptoms.
I think my posts show I have a pretty good handle on my use, the triggers and the underlying causes. The past 10 weeks have been difficult for various reasons - mainly my colleagues enquiring about my personal life, relationship status etc. I know it's coming from a good place but for someone like me, someone with a lot of self reliance, it goes against the identity i have created for myself.
I feel I so much clearer now after a week without cannabis. I mean it's so easy to get into a habit of smoking that stuff daily and putting oneself into a canna-coma.
I'm not interested in addiction as a disease which I think a lot of people on here are. I'm more interested in changing some of my deeply rooted coping strategies that have developed over the course of a lifetime that are not allowing me to lead a fulfilling life at the moment. It took a long time to work out what I liked about opiates because their effects, at low doses, are remarkably subtle. They allow me to be more comfortable in my own skin which makes everything in life easier.
I guess what I am really saying is that I need to improve my self-esteem because clearly taking drugs is not the answer..
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Join Date: May 2013
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It's cool to hear you say that you are already feeling some benefit from not smoking weed. I hope you continue to get more and more. You can do whatever you like in regards to taking opiates. I'm not going to debate the merits. If you feel it's ok, then ok. I think the main concern is that for many people it goes from ok to really not ok fairly quietly and if it can be stopped before it becomes not ok, awesome! The other side of ok sounds really grim.
When I tried to get off dilaudid I felt like I was going to die, literally. I don't know where the line was between me not being physically dependant and then being so. I had no choice because the pain was completely unbearable. I was on 72mg a day for three months and still in pain, still bedridden, only able to crawl or use a walker. Fun times. After the surgery the pain was gone but I then needed the dilaudid for its own reasons. I read about addiction and freaked out. I was never more motivated to get off something and even then I took a month to taper off (advice from doctor). This is nothing like your story, it's a bit random I know. Just that after the brush I had with opiates, I'm not playing with them, not even at low doses. If I'm in excruciating pain I'll take them.
When I tried to get off dilaudid I felt like I was going to die, literally. I don't know where the line was between me not being physically dependant and then being so. I had no choice because the pain was completely unbearable. I was on 72mg a day for three months and still in pain, still bedridden, only able to crawl or use a walker. Fun times. After the surgery the pain was gone but I then needed the dilaudid for its own reasons. I read about addiction and freaked out. I was never more motivated to get off something and even then I took a month to taper off (advice from doctor). This is nothing like your story, it's a bit random I know. Just that after the brush I had with opiates, I'm not playing with them, not even at low doses. If I'm in excruciating pain I'll take them.
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