Frustrated...day 6
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: nj
Posts: 146
Frustrated...day 6
Hi all,
Tonight is the end of day 6! I'm feeling frustrated and wondering if it's just me being overly sensitive or if how I'm feeling makes sense.
The decision to become sober was entirely mine and I am still 100% focused but I've been getting upset with my h because he hasn't said much of anything to me about "your doing great or I'm proud of you" and it's getting upsetting.
I helped him to quit smoking this past summer ( now vaping) but reducing to almost 0% nicotine now. Anyway I told him a zillion times how proud I was of him, etc....
I feel the only encouragement I'm getting is from my sober bf and my friends here on SR. Am I wrong for feeling my h should be encouraging me too?
Tonight is the end of day 6! I'm feeling frustrated and wondering if it's just me being overly sensitive or if how I'm feeling makes sense.
The decision to become sober was entirely mine and I am still 100% focused but I've been getting upset with my h because he hasn't said much of anything to me about "your doing great or I'm proud of you" and it's getting upsetting.
I helped him to quit smoking this past summer ( now vaping) but reducing to almost 0% nicotine now. Anyway I told him a zillion times how proud I was of him, etc....
I feel the only encouragement I'm getting is from my sober bf and my friends here on SR. Am I wrong for feeling my h should be encouraging me too?
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,867
My husband didn't say a thing, nothing, and he still hasn't - years later.
He's a normie; he didn't get it and still doesn't. He will never understand how difficult it is to overcome alcoholism.
I reconciled this reaction by trying to apply 'balance' to the situation. He had lived with my emotionally 'checked-out' status for years. I guess I 'owed' him my acceptance of his non-reaction.
Keep working at your sobriety, Anewyear. It is yours to enjoy, to savor, to cherish. It is one of the greatest gifts you will ever give yourself and, indirectly, those you love.
He's a normie; he didn't get it and still doesn't. He will never understand how difficult it is to overcome alcoholism.
I reconciled this reaction by trying to apply 'balance' to the situation. He had lived with my emotionally 'checked-out' status for years. I guess I 'owed' him my acceptance of his non-reaction.
Keep working at your sobriety, Anewyear. It is yours to enjoy, to savor, to cherish. It is one of the greatest gifts you will ever give yourself and, indirectly, those you love.
Guest
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 167
Congrats on Day 7!! I'm also day 7tomorrow. I was very aggravated tonight and kind of sensitive about everything my h did and didn't do. It passed. I hope your husband gives you some more support. Sometimes men (in general) don't always know how to handle certain things...even though they mean well. No offense to all of my male SR friends �� you're doing awesome!
Sober Alcoholic
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: northern AZ
Posts: 796
I wasn't married when I got sober... lived alone.... so the only strokes I got came from other alkies at meetings and from my sponsor. My hubby is a normie and has never seen me drinking. When I would talk about getting sober he never got it.... Well, not until I let him read my story here. He's a man of a certain generation when men went into their caves whenever anything emotional came up and many of them passed that tendency down to their sons too. He also doesn't seem to notice when I do anything above-and-beyond. In my view, its just more natural for a woman to be more supportive and nourishing. It doesn't mean he's not in your corner. Talk to him.
Congratulations!!!! and ((((((hugs))))))
Congratulations!!!! and ((((((hugs))))))
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