Day 0...
 

My first attempt failed right away... :( Yesterday when I was feeling good, the point before you get blackout drunk, I felt full of confidence. Told myself that New Year's Resolutions are bs and that you should always do it right away. And that they're an excuse to keep drinking for just a few days more.

Today I've used that excuse! In my sober state I feel like I'll just give it until Jan. 1st. Another excuse: it'll be the last occasion where I'll be around alcohol for a while and why should I make it extra difficult.

It will probably be until at least Jan. 1st that I'll be drinking... Unless a miracle happens and I manage to not start drinking.

Dammit!

Sorry. New Years has nothing to do with it. Its one day at a time. Pour out anything that resembles alcohol in your house. Take a long shower. As grueling as it seems...after a few days sober it wont be so bad. You really are gambling with your life when you drink. We all have to sober up at some point. So, how will it be done? Jail? Rehab? Hospital? Mental institution? Nursing home? or...how about at home working recovery?

I prefer at home... I just don't know how. The intent to just quit does not seem to work for me. I need a plan. Instructions. I do well with those.

check your inbox. I pm'd you :)

Amen to that.
You can't circle a date on the calendar, or use some significant anniversary of some sort of event to use that as the day 1 of sobriety.
Your day 1 will probably be a day that has no significance to you or anyone else. It will happen on some random day not because it was THAT date. It will happen because THAT was the date was the day you decided it was time to quit and quit for good. If you keep failing at your attempts, try different techniques or make a change in your lifestyle, routines, etc.

You're not alone, I thought I was strong enough to stay in my Mums for Christmas(where she and my sister drink heavily). Turns out my addiction is much stronger than I thought and I've come home v early to dry out-big lesson learnt and you know what-now I realise how big my problem is I feel much more hopeful for my future. At least I know what I'm dealing with now, all denial has gone. It's up to you how much you want to live. I WILL NOT let this be who I am! Don't let yourself be a drunk (no offence).

I just found out that I had 35 cans of beer in my home. Didn't even know it were that many. I poured them all down the drain. Since I did drink today, tomorrow is officially day 1. But it's a good day 0 now. :)

Hi.

There is a fellowship that works IF we work it called AA. It’s been helping millions of alcoholics for about 80 years successfully when worked as it’s laid out.

BE WELL

Hi Jgreen, well done on making a start, that is awesome.

I am the same as you as in needing instructions !

AA have some good ones. Would you consider going to a meeting ?

Welcome back Jgreen :)

I really recommend you keep a dry house - the other thing I recommend is you make use of the support you have here - if you find thats not enough to keep you sober there are all manner of face to face support systems out there ranging from counselling, through to recovery groups, & all the way to inpatient or outpatient rehab.

You'll get out of your recovery what you put into it, so give it some effort :)

D

I would consider it, yes. I've also found a good site in my country (I prefer to keep that anonymous). They offer an online self-help course. And also offer treatment for those who need more help. And they are THE institute when it comes to alcohol and drugs in my country.

So, liking plans, I've made one:

1. See what happens when I don't drink.
2. Should it become difficult, start the online course and post here.
3. Should that not be enough, ask for more help from that institute.
4. Perhaps go to an AA meeting. I'm a bit concerned that people see me going there, but then again, my health is more important.

That's very true D. Thanks for your advice! I will get this under control. :)

I find the concept of timing to be a weird catch-22.

On one hand, having a sober date or some other kind of chronological starting point (for anything, not just sobriety) provides a milestone and something measurable that says, "I have done (x) for (x) days/months/years and I am proud of that." This type of recognition can be positive and inspiring.

On the other hand, time is relative because we're all different in our recoveries. Some people count days; others do not. Some of us gain momentum by knowing that we're at 30, 60, 90, 180 days, a year, and so on; others disregard the numbers and live blissfully in a state of simply not drinking. What's important regardless of the number of the days is that we are fighting for ourselves.

Personally, I enjoy seeing my sobriety date because it's a good reminder, but I don't live by it religiously. Once I got to about 70 days or so I stopped thinking about it all the time. So, I suppose I fall somewhere in the middle.

Both approaches are completely valid as long as they work, but I've found that a great way to set yourself up for constant relapse and frustration is to say, "I won't quit today but I will quit on (x) date." That excuse just gave me an opportunity to put off until tomorrow what I should have been doing today. I languished for years by doing that. I finally got to a point where I decided that although September 30 is not a momentous occasion, it was the only "now" I had, and that was the time and place to start. I wasn't going to wait for a first-of-the-month, or a holiday and give up hours, days, or weeks that could have been put to good use.

So why not just quit now? New Year's Day would make for a great story, but why waste four days of a head start toward a better life?

New Year's Resolutions fail for many people because a lofty commitment to *wanting* to do something does not equal the grind that it takes to get there. Hell, you can start on that any time of year!

Couldn't agree more 5KRunner!

I have to agree that setting a start day based on a heavy drinking holiday has always failed for me. The problem is, if I don't succeed that day then I give up. "well I screwed up new years guess I have to wait until holiday XYZ" I believe this is why focusing on today is the best approach.

The now is the only moment that exists anyway. Calenders, dates, they're all made up.

You want a miracle? I will give you a miracle in advance. If you dont drink until january 1, you will have five days with zero regrets. You will also have the added strenght of knowing that. And, you will have the "feel good" additive of having resisted on a difficult day. I cannot emphasize enough how important it is to quit today. The effect can be miraculous indeed.

Nice insight, jgreen. ^^^^^ SR really helps so keep that plan to post and read. Welcome.

I found we like to convince ourselves that tomorrow's pain will be easier to deal with, somehow, someway. But how our bodies and minds feel can't be scheduled. It's best to stop the first moment you decide, and not rationalize that you'll stop in the future. Because it won't get easier to stop in the future, but it may get harder.

This