Feeling low and vulnerable
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: London, England
Posts: 1,711
Feeling low and vulnerable
Day 15 or so, and I just feel totally deflated right now. Feel needy and incredibly lonely. Texted a bunch of friends about meeting up later and only one replied, to say she was busy.
Slept badly last night, nightmares all the way.
The temptation to drink has never been stronger. Feeling pretty miserable.
Slept badly last night, nightmares all the way.
The temptation to drink has never been stronger. Feeling pretty miserable.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: The Sooner State
Posts: 1,725
Dont wait on them. Make a plan for you today. find a meeting. do some shopping. go to the store and get something healthy (or not LOL) and make yourself a nice lunch. get out of the house. the craving will pass once you do something for you.
Sober since 10th April 2012
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Perth, Western Australia
Posts: 6,047
Hi Jack, day 15 is awesome! Many people never get that far.
Your feelings are going to be all over the place for a while. Emotions that aren't masked by alcohol can be part of the recovery process. But there's a lot you can do about those cravings to drink.
You'll probably sleep like a baby tonight because you're tired. Make yourself a hot drink, settle down in bed and read or watch television. Make sure you've had a good meal, preferably something you like. Is there someone you can call just for a chat? A movie that engrosses you? Maybe go for a walk with no money in your pockets.
The main thing is not to entertain those thoughts of drinking. They will pop up when we're low and vulnerable, like a disease picks our weakest moments, but you can train yourself to turn your thoughts elsewhere. Be very deliberate about that, and watch your self-talk. My most effective method was to take 5 deep breaths, concentrating on my diaphragm as I breathed. I almost never got to 5 before the craving was a thing of the past.
If you continue to feel low, I suggest you see your doctor. He or she may prescribe anti-depressants to get you through the worst period.
Your feelings are going to be all over the place for a while. Emotions that aren't masked by alcohol can be part of the recovery process. But there's a lot you can do about those cravings to drink.
You'll probably sleep like a baby tonight because you're tired. Make yourself a hot drink, settle down in bed and read or watch television. Make sure you've had a good meal, preferably something you like. Is there someone you can call just for a chat? A movie that engrosses you? Maybe go for a walk with no money in your pockets.
The main thing is not to entertain those thoughts of drinking. They will pop up when we're low and vulnerable, like a disease picks our weakest moments, but you can train yourself to turn your thoughts elsewhere. Be very deliberate about that, and watch your self-talk. My most effective method was to take 5 deep breaths, concentrating on my diaphragm as I breathed. I almost never got to 5 before the craving was a thing of the past.
If you continue to feel low, I suggest you see your doctor. He or she may prescribe anti-depressants to get you through the worst period.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: New York
Posts: 1,372
I'm sorry you're having a tough day Jack. I'm glad you posted. I hope you can make some plans for today. Whether it works out with friends or not, find something to occupy yourself. Or watch a movie and take a nap since your sleep was no good. Early sobriety is an emotional roller coaster and thats normal, but just hang on, don't give in to the temptation. You can do it.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Colorado
Posts: 1,001
Hang in there Jack. This is all normal. Day 15 is an amazing feat. Ive only had 4 day 15s. Now im on day 8.get out and do something special and nice for yourself. You honestly do deserve it. Youre doing great. Keep it up. Remember these feelings will dissipate.
...holds the key
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 7,065
Hey jack! well done on 15 days! 
Im in early recovery too, and things that normally wouldn't bother me (no one being able to hang out for whatever reason) are like huge blows right now! I totally get it!
Find something else to do today and treat yourself like royalty, but don't drink.
Don't even let yourself consider it as a possibility.
I know how lonely it can be when we stop drinking and stop hanging out with our old drinking buddies, but I know we can forge new friendships based on something substantial, rather than a mutual love of booze!
Hang in there, ok?
Im in early recovery too, and things that normally wouldn't bother me (no one being able to hang out for whatever reason) are like huge blows right now! I totally get it!
Find something else to do today and treat yourself like royalty, but don't drink.
Don't even let yourself consider it as a possibility.
I know how lonely it can be when we stop drinking and stop hanging out with our old drinking buddies, but I know we can forge new friendships based on something substantial, rather than a mutual love of booze!
Hang in there, ok?
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Northern Ireland
Posts: 290
Hi Jack,
Ride it out my friend.
Everyone here will have experienced this. Your resolve will get stronger as you get through days like these. Just remember that it won't stay like this - I promise!
Ride it out my friend.
Everyone here will have experienced this. Your resolve will get stronger as you get through days like these. Just remember that it won't stay like this - I promise!
Guest
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 699
Hi Jack,
I'm into the 60's on the days count and I've felt like you describe on more than one occasion.
It'll pass, set yourself a couple of little tasks to do and make a mini plan , you'll be glad you did and it will give you confidence.
I'm into the 60's on the days count and I've felt like you describe on more than one occasion.
It'll pass, set yourself a couple of little tasks to do and make a mini plan , you'll be glad you did and it will give you confidence.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Ottawa, Canada
Posts: 133
Jack,
I did a lot of crying for no reason in the first month. One night I tried to make myself feel better by taking a bath...I ended up crying in the bath for 1/2 an hour and got pruney fingers. IT'S OK. It won't last forever.
Look at it as a level in a video game that you have to get past. I know it's painful, but you'll beat that pixellated dragon at the end and you'll start feeling better.
I did a lot of crying for no reason in the first month. One night I tried to make myself feel better by taking a bath...I ended up crying in the bath for 1/2 an hour and got pruney fingers. IT'S OK. It won't last forever.
Look at it as a level in a video game that you have to get past. I know it's painful, but you'll beat that pixellated dragon at the end and you'll start feeling better.
Do your best
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,047
Jack this is normal your doing really well i agree with the others try to do something go for a walk buy a new book thats what i do reading for me is exellent for the mind
go to meetings also
I understand about the nightmares when they follow and affect your mood know the longer you stay sober they will dissapear i have suffered severve sleep problems my entire lifeand i still get the occasional nightmare but i struggle to remember these days thats how much they will fade
your doing exellent jack your definatly among friends here
if you do go out wrap up ive just come in its cold out there today
go to meetings also
I understand about the nightmares when they follow and affect your mood know the longer you stay sober they will dissapear i have suffered severve sleep problems my entire lifeand i still get the occasional nightmare but i struggle to remember these days thats how much they will fade
your doing exellent jack your definatly among friends here
if you do go out wrap up ive just come in its cold out there today
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: London, England
Posts: 1,711
Thanks everyone.
Right, enough blinkin' wallowing:
I'm gonna eat something good, have a cup of sweet tea, and watch a movie. Then I'm gonna do some press-ups, that usually helps. And I'm not gonna drink today.
Right, enough blinkin' wallowing:
I'm gonna eat something good, have a cup of sweet tea, and watch a movie. Then I'm gonna do some press-ups, that usually helps. And I'm not gonna drink today.
Marchia in Aeternum
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Georgia
Posts: 11,094
Originally Posted by Avice 
Look at it as a level in a video game that you have to get past. I know it's painful, but you'll beat that pixellated dragon at the end and you'll start feeling better.
As you go though the levels, remember to eat the ice cream!
Stay Strong and Motivated
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Chicago, IL
Posts: 78
Originally Posted by Jack16
Thanks everyone.
Right, enough blinkin' wallowing:
I'm gonna eat something good, have a cup of sweet tea, and watch a movie. Then I'm gonna do some press-ups, that usually helps. And I'm not gonna drink today.
Right, enough blinkin' wallowing:
I'm gonna eat something good, have a cup of sweet tea, and watch a movie. Then I'm gonna do some press-ups, that usually helps. And I'm not gonna drink today.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 6,831
Jack, weeks three and four brought the same erratic and mostly negative emotion for me as well. I know it's tough. You're smart to post here. Thick protein shakes helped me and I also made lots of soups etc. that involved chopping veggies etc. to occupy my mind. Good comfort food also. I often ended up turning in a little early too. Glad to see you working through this.....get it behind you and never have to do it again!
...holds the key
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 7,065
Originally Posted by Jack16
Thanks everyone.
Right, enough blinkin' wallowing:
I'm gonna eat something good, have a cup of sweet tea, and watch a movie. Then I'm gonna do some press-ups, that usually helps. And I'm not gonna drink today.
Right, enough blinkin' wallowing:
I'm gonna eat something good, have a cup of sweet tea, and watch a movie. Then I'm gonna do some press-ups, that usually helps. And I'm not gonna drink today.
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