Day 1 again
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 297
Day 1 again
I slipped this weekend and drank wine with my mother. I knew she would be a trigger. I didn't go overboard at all and I have no desire to drink again. I need to make a better plan next time I see her or tell her I will have to wait a while until I feel more secure in my sobriety.
Anyway, I've decided not to look back and to look forward instead. So this is Day 1 again and I will not drink today.
Anyway, I've decided not to look back and to look forward instead. So this is Day 1 again and I will not drink today.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 5,785
DoPerdition, I am sad to hear about your relapse, but I am glad you didn't use it as an excuse to go crazy and am you're already back working on your sobriety again. Have you made a plan for next time you encounter your mother? *hugs*
Stay positive.
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 84
Doperdition~ I agree with the others. It is great that you didn't let drinking that bit of wine with your mom take you to the next level. Does your mom know you are an alcoholic? If she doesn't I would consider telling her.. if she does and still drinks around you or encourages you to do the same I would politely decline and hope she respects your decision. It can be hard staying sober around family members... that was always my MO.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 297
I did tell her but she has trouble controlling her drinking also. She got very drunk and actually blacked out at one point. Seeing that sort of snapped me out of my desire to drink.
I will have to come up with a plan to deal with this in the future.
I will have to come up with a plan to deal with this in the future.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: canada
Posts: 7,242
DoPerdition,
when you decide not to look back, how can you figure out the parts that need changing, the places where wrong turns were taken before you even got to your mom's?
looking back can be a real valuable tool. and has lots to offer to the moving-forward part.
when you decide not to look back, how can you figure out the parts that need changing, the places where wrong turns were taken before you even got to your mom's?
looking back can be a real valuable tool. and has lots to offer to the moving-forward part.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,236
Many of us including me have people
in our family that trigger many different
feelings within us and most of the time
we don't deal with them in healthy ways.
We look for the quick fix that could numb
us so we don't have to face or feel the pain,
hurt, anger, resentments and so on.
That quick fix whether it be drugs, alcohol,
gambling, sex, cutting and so many other
solutions we think may fix the problem, but
it only make matters worse.
As much as I tried to have some sort of
healthy relationship with my mom, the very
person that was to love, care, protect me,
to only hurt and abuse me physically,
verbally and emotionally, wasn't meant
to be.
I chose recovery to live a healthier, happy,
honest life for many yrs. I remained sober,
but when others in the family cant be changed,
I had to accept her just as she is and move
forward and away from the very source that
would keep me in my sickness.
Today, I have no contact with her or family
and for me the best way to handle that
situation was and still is to place them in
Proper Hands of the Man upstairs for care.
That way the weight of them are off my
shoulders and I can continue to remain
sober, healthy and happy in recovery.
in our family that trigger many different
feelings within us and most of the time
we don't deal with them in healthy ways.
We look for the quick fix that could numb
us so we don't have to face or feel the pain,
hurt, anger, resentments and so on.
That quick fix whether it be drugs, alcohol,
gambling, sex, cutting and so many other
solutions we think may fix the problem, but
it only make matters worse.
As much as I tried to have some sort of
healthy relationship with my mom, the very
person that was to love, care, protect me,
to only hurt and abuse me physically,
verbally and emotionally, wasn't meant
to be.
I chose recovery to live a healthier, happy,
honest life for many yrs. I remained sober,
but when others in the family cant be changed,
I had to accept her just as she is and move
forward and away from the very source that
would keep me in my sickness.
Today, I have no contact with her or family
and for me the best way to handle that
situation was and still is to place them in
Proper Hands of the Man upstairs for care.
That way the weight of them are off my
shoulders and I can continue to remain
sober, healthy and happy in recovery.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2014
Posts: 6
Hi Do, I have a similar night coming up on weds, going to my best "drinking" friends for dinner, I tried to tell her before that I thought I had a problem but she said that was rubbish. I guess our drinking friends don't want to loose their drinking buddies. Decided to drive so I can't be pressured to drink, I'll try to explain again I have a problem would prefer her support but if she dismisses it again I will need to take a break from our friendship for a while. Kicking the booze & keeping sober is my number one priority.
Congrats on getting straight back on track that really does show true strength!
Congrats on getting straight back on track that really does show true strength!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2014
Posts: 6
Hi Do, I have a similar night coming up on weds, going to my best "drinking" friends for dinner, I tried to tell her before that I thought I had a problem but she said that was rubbish. I guess our drinking friends don't want to loose their drinking buddies. Decided to drive so I can't be pressured to drink, I'll try to explain again I have a problem would prefer her support but if she dismisses it again I will need to take a break from our friendship for a while. Kicking the booze & keeping sober is my number one priority.
Congrats on getting straight back on track that really does show true strength!
Congrats on getting straight back on track that really does show true strength!
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