Christmas Gifts
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 3,010
Christmas Gifts
Today I am 5 months sober.
I am 2 weeks into my new job.
We had a little Christmas party in the office today, as one of the girls is leaving today until the 5th January. Just fruit, cheese, mince pies, coffee etc.
One of the other girls had a bottle of wine as a gift for everybody. She had obviously put some effort into it as she had each one in a pretty bag with a hand made label etc. I didn't want to seem ungrateful, nor do I want my new colleagues to know about my past, so I accepted it.
My plan is to drop it off at my Grandmas on my way home. Grandma was sick earlier this year, and I know she will have a lot of Christmas visitors.
It's ironic really: on the day I'm 5 months sober I get presented with a gift of alcohol.
So how do you deal with unwanted gifts?
I am 2 weeks into my new job.
We had a little Christmas party in the office today, as one of the girls is leaving today until the 5th January. Just fruit, cheese, mince pies, coffee etc.
One of the other girls had a bottle of wine as a gift for everybody. She had obviously put some effort into it as she had each one in a pretty bag with a hand made label etc. I didn't want to seem ungrateful, nor do I want my new colleagues to know about my past, so I accepted it.
My plan is to drop it off at my Grandmas on my way home. Grandma was sick earlier this year, and I know she will have a lot of Christmas visitors.
It's ironic really: on the day I'm 5 months sober I get presented with a gift of alcohol.
So how do you deal with unwanted gifts?
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 1,869
Hi Tetra:
Congrats on your 5 months. I have been following your journey and I am proud of the long way you have come. I would take the bottle (as you did) and give it away, throw it away, just don't keep it around. Nobody can make us drink and your coworker is just being nice to all. I also had a wine club subscription in which 2 bottles of wine came to my house a month. My hubby drank them and we served them for guests. It really didn't bother me having the bottles around. My battle doesn't include external factors. For me it's all inside.
I'm almost to 9 months. Let's keep going!!!
Congrats on your 5 months. I have been following your journey and I am proud of the long way you have come. I would take the bottle (as you did) and give it away, throw it away, just don't keep it around. Nobody can make us drink and your coworker is just being nice to all. I also had a wine club subscription in which 2 bottles of wine came to my house a month. My hubby drank them and we served them for guests. It really didn't bother me having the bottles around. My battle doesn't include external factors. For me it's all inside.
I'm almost to 9 months. Let's keep going!!!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,236
I would have done exactly what you've
done by quietly, graciously accepting a
gift, no matter what it is, and passing
it on.
It's those quiet, unseen, unheard little
things we do that can only be seen and
heard by the Man upstairs.
To give with not expecting anything
in return are the rewards we are blessed
with in recovery.
Im so proud of your accomplishments
in recovery as you continue to learn and
grow with each and every step you take.
done by quietly, graciously accepting a
gift, no matter what it is, and passing
it on.
It's those quiet, unseen, unheard little
things we do that can only be seen and
heard by the Man upstairs.
To give with not expecting anything
in return are the rewards we are blessed
with in recovery.
Im so proud of your accomplishments
in recovery as you continue to learn and
grow with each and every step you take.
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
Sometime about 6 months from now you can casually mention to this kind friend that you're not drinking anymore. If pressed, you can say it's for health reasons. That will ensure that you won't get a similar present next year!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,857
Hi Tetra; congrats on 5 months and your new job; great news.
As for alcohol as a gift, I just smile, say thank you, and either later give it away or take it home to my husband who is a normal drinker.
Your decision to give the bottle to your Grandma is great.
As for alcohol as a gift, I just smile, say thank you, and either later give it away or take it home to my husband who is a normal drinker.
Your decision to give the bottle to your Grandma is great.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: New York
Posts: 1,372
I think you handled that very well Tetra. It's a gift to yourself today, on your 5 month milestone, to be able to graciously accept it and give it away. I have been given a bottle of wine a few times as a thank you gift and handled as you did. I thanked the person and then gave it to someone who does not have a problem with alcohol who I knew would enjoy it. It made me feel empowered and proud of myself to do that. Well done Tetra and congrats on 5 months.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Earth
Posts: 607
Great job on five months. You can't protect yourself from exposure and temptation forever. It's a learning experience. I have received bottles and six packs of beer from tenants at my work. I actually tell them (in a nice way) I don't drink but my guests will very much enjoy it and thank you. That way they know in the future. Never been questioned why.
Being around booze is really tough at first but it's impossible to go through your whole life avoiding it. Getting through this stuff will help you desensitize.
Again, Congratulations!
Being around booze is really tough at first but it's impossible to go through your whole life avoiding it. Getting through this stuff will help you desensitize.
Again, Congratulations!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,414
I was just thinking about you this morning Tetra--
Giving the wine to your Grandma is is great idea
Are you enjoying your new job?
It sounds like things are going well and you are becoming part of the team.
Well done you!
Giving the wine to your Grandma is is great idea
Are you enjoying your new job?
It sounds like things are going well and you are becoming part of the team.
Well done you!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Sussex UK
Posts: 112
When I was in rehab with 7 girls we all went to a local fair one weekend. There was a tombola and guess who won a bottle of wine. I just quietly asked to swap it for something else and took a lesser prize.
Well done in your resolve. You are obviously able to resort to plan b quite quickly without even thinking about the alternative.
Well done in your resolve. You are obviously able to resort to plan b quite quickly without even thinking about the alternative.
I think dropping the wine off to your grandma is a good idea.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: New Orleans, LA
Posts: 985
Yup, I agree with everyone. You handled the situation with grace, passed a lovely gift on to grandma, and stayed grounded. I'm really glad that you're liking your new job. You are blossoming, out in the world!
Life is an unlikely miracle.
Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: England
Posts: 1,859
Congratulations on five months, Tetra, that is awesome 
Well done handling the gift so well - I think I've pretty much let everyone know not to buy wine, but you can't escape that odd one...
Well done handling the gift so well - I think I've pretty much let everyone know not to buy wine, but you can't escape that odd one...
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