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-   -   Need a "2nd" Opinion (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/352994-need-2nd-opinion.html)

Magellan 12-08-2014 11:49 AM

Need a "2nd" Opinion
 
I read in another thread that if I think I will drink that I should at least post and get a 2nd opinion. Well I am setup to fail tonight, just popped into my head that I should get home early and have a beer. I tried working out at lunchtime, weights/cardio the steam... felt great, probably too good, because now I feel great and the stupid little voice is saying that it could be better, come on just have one or two, you set everything right at work and it is overcast, cold and a Monday, blah, blah. I can argue back and forth with myself but I know if I am having this much trouble now, the ride home will be it. I am even putting a stop gap measure in place, scheduled a haircut for 3:30p, so I'll have the drive home and then a 30 minute breather getting a haircut then I'm home so maybe that will be enough to shut it up. Well, there, I am trying a 2nd opinion. Not sure it will do any good because even the sober voice isn't helping much. Okay off to the barber.

CNY46ER 12-08-2014 11:52 AM

The AV is really getting to you. Dont do it, think about all the wonderful things alcohol did for you all these years and reconsider.

awuh1 12-08-2014 11:54 AM

"There's nothing so bad that a drink won't make worse".

SoberLife90 12-08-2014 11:55 AM

Hello! Glad you came for a 2nd opinion. I bet that's your sober voice trying to help you! Anyways your alcoholic voice is telling you its okay now...but what about the guilt and the shame of drinking afterward? Think of all the reasons you stopped drinking in the first place. Maybe take a different way home where you don't pass your favorite liquor store. Maybe get your favorite non alcoholic beverages but don't go into the liquor store to get it! Relax and watch a t.v. show you like instead. Trust me you will regret drinking....Do is alcoholics ever really just have 1 beer? I know ow I sure never did. You can do it post back here whenever you need to!

SoberLeigh 12-08-2014 11:55 AM

Your AV must be feeling threatened; tell it that it should be. Kick it to the curb, Magellan.

biminiblue 12-08-2014 12:11 PM

I'll be the sixth opinion.

Don't do it.

Then you would have to start over. Yuck. Those first few days of sobriety were bad enough to still be vivid to me. The anxiety and fear and sickness? NOnoNOnoNO.

doggonecarl 12-08-2014 12:28 PM


Originally Posted by Magellan (Post 5064833)
Well I am setup to fail tonight, just popped into my head that I should get home early and have a beer.

Glad you posted first, even though it sounds like you have already decided a "fail" is going to occur. Don't let that happen. Too often, fails turn to "F**K ITs" and more drinking, and then you'll be coming back here wondering why it's so hard to stop drinking.

Spare yourself the grief. Don't drink and recommit (in writing) to your decision to quit drinking.

Arbor 12-08-2014 12:30 PM

Great job posting here. Listen to Us. Don't do it! It's a trick. You know deep down you really don't want it anyway.

ReadyAtLast 12-08-2014 12:31 PM

Read Rational recovery/AVRT- google it -your post is full of the AV and it may help you.

I would also recommend 'urge surfing' -it helps me immensely and the feelings you have now do pass What is Urge Surfing? | Urge Surf

I've never woken up in the morning glad I'd had a drink but many many times I woke wishing I'd not.

Ruby2 12-08-2014 12:42 PM

Nope. Don't do it. So it's gray and rainy and miserable where I am. I'm wearing a bright cheery orange and creating my own sunshine. Put on some bright colors, turn the lights on and dance. Have some hot chocolate with whipped cream. Put a cherry on top. Tell the little voice "no thank you. I'm tired of the lies and misery." The false promise of a quick and painless solution. Why do the lottery sellers do so well? Same thing. How many times have you hit the jackpot? Do it now by not drinking.

MarathonMan 12-08-2014 12:57 PM

Ive been in that situation so many times, often the slip is innevitable once the inner argument really picks up a head of steam. To get past those first few times is the only way you get your first sober muscles.....you will feel like shite if you drink, if you dont youll feel like a winner galvanising yourself against the next internal struggle. Only you can decide to ignore the voice....you think it cant be but it can be ignored.....whatever happens you'll have the consequences....you'll wake up with smile or the grimaced, spring in your bstep or shambling around for the first hour of the day.

Soberwolf 12-08-2014 01:25 PM

Hi Magellen your doing really well drinking will destroy all that im glad your here reaching out

try this http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-cravings.html

and http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...e-surfing.html

Hope you feel better after your haircut and stay close to SR keep posting and reading

well done

strategery 12-08-2014 01:31 PM

Answer you AV's question. Is your night really going to be better to have one, two, whatever? Think about any problems you have had or things you were embarrassed about as a result from drinking.

Magellan 12-08-2014 01:43 PM

I think the haircut stop over worked, then reading much advice on my phone and then getting home and checking in now, it offered enough of a break that the sober voice is finally kicking in. The holidays are tough, I thought Thanksgiving was tough, but this time of year is filled with so much stuff, thanks for all the responses!! I should get a green day now :)

Magellan 12-08-2014 01:44 PM


Originally Posted by MarathonMan (Post 5064928)
Ive been in that situation so many times, often the slip is innevitable once the inner argument really picks up a head of steam. To get past those first few times is the only way you get your first sober muscles.....you will feel like shite if you drink, if you dont youll feel like a winner galvanising yourself against the next internal struggle. Only you can decide to ignore the voice....you think it cant be but it can be ignored.....whatever happens you'll have the consequences....you'll wake up with smile or the grimaced, spring in your bstep or shambling around for the first hour of the day.

You are so right, this is the way it always is!!
Thanks

Magellan 12-08-2014 01:44 PM


Originally Posted by soberwolf (Post 5064969)
Hi Magellen your doing really well drinking will destroy all that im glad your here reaching out

try this http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-cravings.html

and http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...e-surfing.html

Hope you feel better after your haircut and stay close to SR keep posting and reading

well done

The haircut worked :) along with the 2nd Opinion.
Thanks

Soberwolf 12-08-2014 01:47 PM

:hug: :You_Rock_

Magellan 12-08-2014 01:47 PM


Originally Posted by doggonecarl (Post 5064880)
Glad you posted first, even though it sounds like you have already decided a "fail" is going to occur. Don't let that happen. Too often, fails turn to "F**K ITs" and more drinking, and then you'll be coming back here wondering why it's so hard to stop drinking.

Spare yourself the grief. Don't drink and recommit (in writing) to your decision to quit drinking.

As I left work, after I posted I think you are right I had already decided to "fail" - I didn't think it would hurt to at least try the "2nd Opinion" as I've tried to fight it alone and we all know that doesn't work.
Thanks, I think this was a good start to the week.

dwtbd 12-08-2014 01:52 PM

Awesome 'cause now you got the chance to wake up and not feel like crap not 'just' because you didn't drink, instead you are going to wake up feeling fantastic Because You didn't, thats sober muscle

Leshar 12-08-2014 01:58 PM

Good for you for posting and doing so well.
I know it's horribly hard, I'm there with you, but we must maintain hope that it will be better for us.
Good wishes to you.


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