I'd really like to drink
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 181
I'd really like to drink
Constant nonstop 24/7 battle going on in me. Driving by bars, listening to coworkers talk about their drinking and how awesome it is. I want to drink an ice cold beer oh so bad. My adrenaline and endorphins get all fired up just going by places. My brain doesn't want to acknowledge all the negative stuff.
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Location: east coast
Posts: 451
I know, its truly a battle, seems never ending to drink or not to drink. Im just trying to hold on to why I can't drink and all the misery that is sure to follow if I do drink. I know the misery is going to be there with drinking. I have proved this to be true for me everytime I picked up a drink thinking it would be different this time.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Los Angeles, California
Posts: 8,326
Soberbrah, the craving will pass. You're romancing the drink, I think. Youd be pouring poison down your throat. read about rational recovery, post and read here.
don't take yourself down the road to hell.
Love from Lenina
don't take yourself down the road to hell.
Love from Lenina
Member
Join Date: Dec 2014
Posts: 41
Originally Posted by soberbrah 
Constant nonstop 24/7 battle going on in me. Driving by bars, listening to coworkers talk about their drinking and how awesome it is. I want to drink an ice cold beer oh so bad. My adrenaline and endorphins get all fired up just going by places. My brain doesn't want to acknowledge all the negative stuff.
That's how you justify it!
If I would have drank tonight I would have woken up hungover and missed half my day tomorrow. It never ends with just one drink.
It's funny I was going to the liquor store to get a shot. Was smoking a cig on the way and was thinking, okay just a shot, got to the store and was about to get out when I noticed? I was going to get 3 shots now! Out of nowhere I told my self I'm getting 3 now!
Just got back in and left!
I can't do just a drink!
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,373
The trouble for us is it's never one beer - I dunno about you but one beer does nothing...I need an enormous amount.
You have no idea where that beer will take me or how much crap I'll end up in.
If you're like me, you'll end up hating and despising yourself tho and wishing you were a better man....and end up in despair.
and then, after all that, maybe tomorrow maybe the next day, maybe next week...the feeling will return...what do you do with it then brah?
we have to break the cycle - or we're doomed to repeat it.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-cravings.html
D
You have no idea where that beer will take me or how much crap I'll end up in.
If you're like me, you'll end up hating and despising yourself tho and wishing you were a better man....and end up in despair.
and then, after all that, maybe tomorrow maybe the next day, maybe next week...the feeling will return...what do you do with it then brah?
we have to break the cycle - or we're doomed to repeat it.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-cravings.html
D
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Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 4,580
Originally Posted by soberbrah
Constant nonstop 24/7 battle going on in me. Driving by bars, listening to coworkers talk about their drinking and how awesome it is. I want to drink an ice cold beer oh so bad. My adrenaline and endorphins get all fired up just going by places. My brain doesn't want to acknowledge all the negative stuff.
Wanna know something? It's a giant con...an illusion. It doesn't bloody work anyway. We ain't the sort to enjoy one or two and find a lovely groove...
No..we keep drinking in a desperate quest to land in some sort of emotional eden. We can't get them down our gullets fast enough...where, where, where..when, when, when ..will it hit...the "ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh".
It doesn't come Soberbrah.
It just makes a giant arse of ya...and cackles while you whine and whimper...
It's NEVER enough. You never get there...
It's ruse...an illusion...a con.
Life is an unlikely miracle.
Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: England
Posts: 1,859
Feel for you, Soberbrah.
Sounds to me like you are white knuckling it when you don't need to. I know you don't like AA, have you checked out Lifering ? It's totally different, not as old fashioned, and no god anywhere in sight. They have online meetings too.
I think you could do with some more tools in you box -you don't seem to have any techniques to use for cravings or anything else to occupy you. Feels like you're being tossed about by your AV and can't do anything about it. Lifering and AVRT will give you some good tips, and the craving link Dee gave you is really good as well.
I hope that you find acceptance Brah, it will be much easier for you to concentrate on living sober rather than concentrating on missing the drink so much.
You are doing so well, you have some strength of character there my friend, you really do.
You probably can't see it but you are actually doing an awesome job- you're sober.
Sounds to me like you are white knuckling it when you don't need to. I know you don't like AA, have you checked out Lifering ? It's totally different, not as old fashioned, and no god anywhere in sight. They have online meetings too.
I think you could do with some more tools in you box -you don't seem to have any techniques to use for cravings or anything else to occupy you. Feels like you're being tossed about by your AV and can't do anything about it. Lifering and AVRT will give you some good tips, and the craving link Dee gave you is really good as well.
I hope that you find acceptance Brah, it will be much easier for you to concentrate on living sober rather than concentrating on missing the drink so much.
You are doing so well, you have some strength of character there my friend, you really do.
You probably can't see it but you are actually doing an awesome job- you're sober.
Hears The Voice
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Unshackled
Posts: 7,901
It's tough at first, but let's keep perspective. It's frequent, but it isn't nonstop 24/7. You're sleeping some and there are some things that can take your mind off of it for a while, even if it's just a few minutes. I'm not trying to minimize the suffering - it's real - but exaggerating it is your addiction manipulating you into believing it's a monster that can't be beaten.
I found mindfulness techniques to be helpful. Instead of losing myself in the feeling of wanting a drink, I contemplated the emotion. Why is it here? what does it want? what can it actually do to me if I don't give in to it? Separate it. Put it in a box. Define it's limits. It is not an enormous, eternal monster.
The only way to get rid of that awful feeling is to starve it. If you give into it you just make it worse.
Welcome to the fight of your life. You can do this.
I found mindfulness techniques to be helpful. Instead of losing myself in the feeling of wanting a drink, I contemplated the emotion. Why is it here? what does it want? what can it actually do to me if I don't give in to it? Separate it. Put it in a box. Define it's limits. It is not an enormous, eternal monster.
The only way to get rid of that awful feeling is to starve it. If you give into it you just make it worse.
Welcome to the fight of your life. You can do this.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: C.C. Ma.
Posts: 3,697
Hi.
For some it’s easier than others. For me it was suggested to think of anything else except drinking. It worked when I worked that idea. Often the obsession was relieved within seconds. I also was relieved of much obsessive thoughts by eating sugar sweets which the body was in need of since the loss of sugar supplied by the alcohol.
The majority of my learning about the ism came from the experts with many years in AA.
BE WELL
For some it’s easier than others. For me it was suggested to think of anything else except drinking. It worked when I worked that idea. Often the obsession was relieved within seconds. I also was relieved of much obsessive thoughts by eating sugar sweets which the body was in need of since the loss of sugar supplied by the alcohol.
The majority of my learning about the ism came from the experts with many years in AA.
BE WELL
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
Make your last binge the last binge. You can do it if you fully committ to never drinking. If in your mind you are entertaining drinking in order to stop the obsessing over alcohol, the battle will just rage on. You know this. You've been struggling to stay sober since, what? 2011? Long enough, I think.
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