Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it's back to AA I go
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 319
Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it's back to AA I go
I don't know what else to do, besides go see the counselor Monday. I've gone to plenty of meetings and met lots of lovely people in meetings. I soak up all the joy and positive energy, and then I go right back to where I was before. ARGH. It is so frustrating. Will there ever be a time when I finally "get" it? Has anyone else been able to sober up without spousal support? There are plenty of times I wouldn't have drank if there wasn't a big old bottle of liquor in the cabinet that my husband brought home, but I know the responsibility is ultimately mine, no excuses. It's just makes it very difficult.
Yes, well there are always reasons to drink for an alcoholic.
There is alcohol on every corner. The decision to not drink is yours and yours alone. Your hand, your mouth.
I hope you are open to the message and solution offered in AA this time.
There is alcohol on every corner. The decision to not drink is yours and yours alone. Your hand, your mouth.
I hope you are open to the message and solution offered in AA this time.
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Join Date: May 2014
Location: liverpool, england
Posts: 1,708
for me i had to put myself and trying to get sober and stay sober first, my kids were in care and me and the ex clung on to each other like glue and we both tried to give up together but in the end things got so bad i had to go my own way she ended up finding another drunk to live with etc
at the time it was all so dam painful but now 10 years on i can look back and see it was the only way i was ever going to get sober and stand on my own 2 feet again was once i was out of that madness as while i was in it i had no chance
i did end up losing everything in life and was lucky to end up in a flat that a charity helped me out with for somewhere i could live
but thats the depths the booze took me down today i dont ever want to run the risk of ever going back down there again so for me staying sober is my number one goal i have to put right up on the top of my list as without being sober i will end up with nothing
at the time it was all so dam painful but now 10 years on i can look back and see it was the only way i was ever going to get sober and stand on my own 2 feet again was once i was out of that madness as while i was in it i had no chance
i did end up losing everything in life and was lucky to end up in a flat that a charity helped me out with for somewhere i could live
but thats the depths the booze took me down today i dont ever want to run the risk of ever going back down there again so for me staying sober is my number one goal i have to put right up on the top of my list as without being sober i will end up with nothing
I'm not sure exactly what will happen with me. I've been sober 8 days. My boyfriend works away for 2 weeks at a time. He drinks, he binges but can have 1 with no problem too.
Not sure how that will go, we spend a lot of sober time together though.
I'll just tell him to go out with his friends if he wants to party. I don't mind if he brings alcohol into the house because he drinks beer and I never drink beer. Wine is my poison.
He's a sweetie though, I know he'll support my no drinking.
The thing I'm concerned about though, is that he doesn't know I'm an alcoholic, he just thinks I have a drinking problem that can be solved by drinking less, not sure how he'll feel when I tell him I can't drink ever again. Maybe he'll be happy haha! I'm a psycho when I blackout, he'll probably breathe a sigh of relief, But miss me at parties.
Who knows, he comes back next week, we'll see then.
Not sure how that will go, we spend a lot of sober time together though.
I'll just tell him to go out with his friends if he wants to party. I don't mind if he brings alcohol into the house because he drinks beer and I never drink beer. Wine is my poison.
He's a sweetie though, I know he'll support my no drinking.
The thing I'm concerned about though, is that he doesn't know I'm an alcoholic, he just thinks I have a drinking problem that can be solved by drinking less, not sure how he'll feel when I tell him I can't drink ever again. Maybe he'll be happy haha! I'm a psycho when I blackout, he'll probably breathe a sigh of relief, But miss me at parties.
Who knows, he comes back next week, we'll see then.
I don't know what else to do, besides go see the counselor Monday. I've gone to plenty of meetings and met lots of lovely people in meetings. I soak up all the joy and positive energy, and then I go right back to where I was before. ARGH. It is so frustrating. Will there ever be a time when I finally "get" it? Has anyone else been able to sober up without spousal support? There are plenty of times I wouldn't have drank if there wasn't a big old bottle of liquor in the cabinet that my husband brought home, but I know the responsibility is ultimately mine, no excuses. It's just makes it very difficult.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ined-long.html
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 319
I cannot seem to get beyond step 2. Yes, I am painfully aware of my lack of progress. That's why I'm here. And there. And as I said I also have an appointment lined up with an addiction counselor. I am also going to an addiction psychiatrist but I don't know if he truly understands the nature of this disease (he tells me I should just "cut down", and I need to completely quit). There is no cutting down for me. I did try some naltrexone he prescribed which did absolutely nothing. I don't know what else to do besides go back to AA and start reading my big book again.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 319
For years I knew I wanted to stop drinking, yet continued to do it anyway. I didn't "get" it. It wasn't until I found Rational Recovery/AVRT that I truly understood why I kept drinking when I knew that I really wanted to stop. It helped me a lot, maybe it could help you too?
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ined-long.html
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ined-long.html
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 319
I'm not sure exactly what will happen with me. I've been sober 8 days. My boyfriend works away for 2 weeks at a time. He drinks, he binges but can have 1 with no problem too.
Not sure how that will go, we spend a lot of sober time together though.
I'll just tell him to go out with his friends if he wants to party. I don't mind if he brings alcohol into the house because he drinks beer and I never drink beer. Wine is my poison.
He's a sweetie though, I know he'll support my no drinking.
The thing I'm concerned about though, is that he doesn't know I'm an alcoholic, he just thinks I have a drinking problem that can be solved by drinking less, not sure how he'll feel when I tell him I can't drink ever again. Maybe he'll be happy haha! I'm a psycho when I blackout, he'll probably breathe a sigh of relief, But miss me at parties.
Who knows, he comes back next week, we'll see then.
Not sure how that will go, we spend a lot of sober time together though.
I'll just tell him to go out with his friends if he wants to party. I don't mind if he brings alcohol into the house because he drinks beer and I never drink beer. Wine is my poison.
He's a sweetie though, I know he'll support my no drinking.
The thing I'm concerned about though, is that he doesn't know I'm an alcoholic, he just thinks I have a drinking problem that can be solved by drinking less, not sure how he'll feel when I tell him I can't drink ever again. Maybe he'll be happy haha! I'm a psycho when I blackout, he'll probably breathe a sigh of relief, But miss me at parties.
Who knows, he comes back next week, we'll see then.
I don't know that I would have been able to stay sober if there was booze in my home, especially during early sobriety. I am now approaching five years, and while usually I am OK in situations where others are drinking, only rarely is there alcohol in my house (brought by someone else, who takes it with them when they leave).
My home is my sanctuary, and it wouldn't be that if there were booze kept there.
My home is my sanctuary, and it wouldn't be that if there were booze kept there.
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