A+
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Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Deep in the heart of Texas
Posts: 1,736
A+
Today I have 100 days of sobriety.
One. Hundred. Days.
I work in administration for a public school district and am a parent of 2 school-aged kiddos. 100 has great significance to me. 100 in my world = an A+. It means a subject or topic has been mastered and it’s safe to move on. As a parent it means that a teacher has done their job and my child gets it. 100 in the world of sobriety means something very different. It means I’m simply off to a good start. The test is not complete; the paper not yet finished, the subject is far from being mastered.
But I’m on my way.
I’ve been blessed with two children that the education system has labeled gifted and talented. So far they’ve been able to master pretty much anything put in their paths. Although they are very smart, they still have much to learn. The other night we got into a debate at dinner regarding tests. They feel tests are pointless because all that they think happens is you study for a test, pass and then forget everything you studied for. Thanks to my sobriety I was able to tell them that is a very dangerous point of view. If you forget what you learned, you’ll never move forward. You’ll stay stuck where you are and keep repeating the same mistakes over and over and over. I get this looking back on endless Day 1's. For better or for worse, age and experience will teach them this as well. I just pray they will not have to discover it the way I did.
There’s a brilliant thread currently on the Newcomers Board entitled “What Exactly Has Gotten Better For You?” The answers are heart-felt and beautiful. I wrote about the sense of freedom I feel now. I’m no longer looking over my shoulder waiting for my dirty little secret of binge drinking myself into oblivion every night to be exposed. I exposed it myself by admitting I have a real problem and surrendering my soul to sobriety. By doing so, I lifted the veil of shame, fear and self-hatred that I had cloaked myself in for over 20 years of drinking. I wrote that it’s the most free I've ever felt in my life. “I breathe these heavy sighs of relief multiple times throughout the day…I thank the Universe for it every, single chance I get. It damned near brings me to my knees in gratefulness. “
Another particularly poignant post on the same thread spoke of being a better husband – being available to his wife 24/7. Drinking robbed him of that but more importantly it robbed his wife. That’s what I’m currently learning about sobriety. Yes, it’s a new lease on life for me but sometimes I think it’s an even bigger one for my family. It’s just about the truest win/win there is going these days. Too many things rob us of our time, peace, serenity and each other. By remaining sober I am no longer contributing to that list. I like to tell people my life is infinitely better sober. So are the lives of everyone who loves me. And thanks to my clear, sober head and eyes I'm able to finally realize the list of people who love me is long. Better yet, I’m at the top of it.
I like me sober.
My next 100 days I’m going to be working on loving me sober.
My husband is currently on tour in England. I texted him this morning with the news of my 100 days. This is what he wrote back: “This makes me so happy and so, so proud of you. But you should be proud of YOURSELF, my love!! This is something you chose to do and you are accomplishing it!!”
Yes, I’m proud. Yes, I’m accomplishing it. But I’ll never, ever stop working toward my A+ in sobriety.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CWcATuuZAxs
"Hearts afire creates love desire
Take you high and higher
To the world you belong"
One. Hundred. Days.
I work in administration for a public school district and am a parent of 2 school-aged kiddos. 100 has great significance to me. 100 in my world = an A+. It means a subject or topic has been mastered and it’s safe to move on. As a parent it means that a teacher has done their job and my child gets it. 100 in the world of sobriety means something very different. It means I’m simply off to a good start. The test is not complete; the paper not yet finished, the subject is far from being mastered.
But I’m on my way.
I’ve been blessed with two children that the education system has labeled gifted and talented. So far they’ve been able to master pretty much anything put in their paths. Although they are very smart, they still have much to learn. The other night we got into a debate at dinner regarding tests. They feel tests are pointless because all that they think happens is you study for a test, pass and then forget everything you studied for. Thanks to my sobriety I was able to tell them that is a very dangerous point of view. If you forget what you learned, you’ll never move forward. You’ll stay stuck where you are and keep repeating the same mistakes over and over and over. I get this looking back on endless Day 1's. For better or for worse, age and experience will teach them this as well. I just pray they will not have to discover it the way I did.
There’s a brilliant thread currently on the Newcomers Board entitled “What Exactly Has Gotten Better For You?” The answers are heart-felt and beautiful. I wrote about the sense of freedom I feel now. I’m no longer looking over my shoulder waiting for my dirty little secret of binge drinking myself into oblivion every night to be exposed. I exposed it myself by admitting I have a real problem and surrendering my soul to sobriety. By doing so, I lifted the veil of shame, fear and self-hatred that I had cloaked myself in for over 20 years of drinking. I wrote that it’s the most free I've ever felt in my life. “I breathe these heavy sighs of relief multiple times throughout the day…I thank the Universe for it every, single chance I get. It damned near brings me to my knees in gratefulness. “
Another particularly poignant post on the same thread spoke of being a better husband – being available to his wife 24/7. Drinking robbed him of that but more importantly it robbed his wife. That’s what I’m currently learning about sobriety. Yes, it’s a new lease on life for me but sometimes I think it’s an even bigger one for my family. It’s just about the truest win/win there is going these days. Too many things rob us of our time, peace, serenity and each other. By remaining sober I am no longer contributing to that list. I like to tell people my life is infinitely better sober. So are the lives of everyone who loves me. And thanks to my clear, sober head and eyes I'm able to finally realize the list of people who love me is long. Better yet, I’m at the top of it.
I like me sober.
My next 100 days I’m going to be working on loving me sober.
My husband is currently on tour in England. I texted him this morning with the news of my 100 days. This is what he wrote back: “This makes me so happy and so, so proud of you. But you should be proud of YOURSELF, my love!! This is something you chose to do and you are accomplishing it!!”
Yes, I’m proud. Yes, I’m accomplishing it. But I’ll never, ever stop working toward my A+ in sobriety.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CWcATuuZAxs
"Hearts afire creates love desire
Take you high and higher
To the world you belong"
100 days is fantastic 
voices ca**y
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: St. Paul Minnesota
Posts: 4,359
Look at you go! I am dancing all sexy to that song right now. So proud of you Hearts!
That's the way of the world
Plant your flowers and you grow a pearl
A child is born with a heart of gold
The way of the world makes his heart grow cold
That's the way of the world
Plant your flowers and you grow a pearl
A child is born with a heart of gold
The way of the world makes his heart grow cold
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 4,580
Originally Posted by HeartsAfire 
Thanks to my sobriety I was able to tell them that is a very dangerous point of view. If you forget what you learned, you’ll never move forward. You’ll stay stuck where you are and keep repeating the same mistakes over and over and over.
100 days of 100% living...
And you just keep on bringing fabulous you to the table each and every day
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