am i doing the right thing
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 24
am i doing the right thing
hi, i am new to this, usually go to aa meetings but didn't tonight. my 23 year old daughter is in jail for tampering with drugs, drug abuse instruments and drug para. she is begging me to bail her out and everyone i know says leave her in. i myself am a recovering drug addict/ alcoholic so i know the deal. just hurts me so much to see her going in the same direction i went in. i am so afraid she is going to die. i guess i know i need to let her stay in jail, i just need to let how i am feeling out. i am so worried about her, i don't think she realizes just how bad it is, at least she has not admitted to me that she has a problem. drugs are always someone elses and what people tell me about her is always a lie, but i know different. she is ruining her life and it kills me to see her doing this. if anybody has any advice i would appreciate it.
thanks terry
thanks terry
Don't get undies in a bunch
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: South Shore MA
Posts: 7,120
I always find this a tough question. The lawyer says...never leave them in over night. Parental feelings say go get them.
Wisdom says let them stay and maybe wake up to what is real.
Still hurts to do it though. Seems you know her best and have the right understanding of what to do.
Would be wonderful if they would hear and act on the things we can tell them.
Thing is though.... most need to find out the truth for themself.
Bailed out one and one had to stay. The one who had to stay learned a thing or two.
Wisdom says let them stay and maybe wake up to what is real.
Still hurts to do it though. Seems you know her best and have the right understanding of what to do.
Would be wonderful if they would hear and act on the things we can tell them.
Thing is though.... most need to find out the truth for themself.
Bailed out one and one had to stay. The one who had to stay learned a thing or two.
In Memory Of
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Connecticut.
Posts: 3,736
You are doing the right thing by leaving her there . I know it is painful . I think tough love is the hardest kind to give , My heart goes out to you and my prayers are with you ..You can also try posting in the naranon forum here , there are great people here at sr you have come to the right place . Bless Trish
Headed in the right direction.
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Las Vegas
Posts: 257
Man, I can't even imagine what you are going through. Your natural instinct is to rescue your baby - but you need to practice tough love at the same time. Difficult balance.... at best.
My prayers are with you, best of luck to both you and your daughter. You never know when the lightbulb will go on for kids, so keep your hopes up, as long as she is alive, it is not too late.
My prayers are with you, best of luck to both you and your daughter. You never know when the lightbulb will go on for kids, so keep your hopes up, as long as she is alive, it is not too late.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Beaver, WA
Posts: 1,346
(((((((((Terry)))))))))
If you're a recovering alcoholic or addict, then you probably do already know the deal. Only suggestion I have is for you to try some continuing prayers. Your decision following that is your affair and I will keep you & your daughter in my prayers. Sounds like possibly NA would be a good "suggestion" for her once she is released.
((((((((Terry & Daughter))))))))) Kiss Hearts of Spirit
in Love & Service,
3Legs
If you're a recovering alcoholic or addict, then you probably do already know the deal. Only suggestion I have is for you to try some continuing prayers. Your decision following that is your affair and I will keep you & your daughter in my prayers. Sounds like possibly NA would be a good "suggestion" for her once she is released.
((((((((Terry & Daughter))))))))) Kiss Hearts of Spirit
in Love & Service,
3Legs
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