steffie

I love your posts nuudawn - you are brilliant!

Hawks

what do you think the main problem is ?

Rice

Just.. Not alcohol.

I'll be fine.

Hawks

OK .... if you decide to open up, I'll be around, along with the rest of the SR family.

Nuudawn

So what do you use to run away from you..if not alcohol..what?

What pain brought you here?

And no, I doubt you're fine.

Seems to be a whole lot of people ready to be right here with ya...when you radically accept..you're not.

Nonsensical

I like your avatar, Rice. You seem reluctant to find yourself. Is it because you believe you are not truly lost?

You joined SR 22 months ago. You first posted 12 months ago. That indicates that some part of you has been ready to get started finding yourself for quite some time.

November 2015 is coming, no matter what any of us does, it's coming. Will you look back then as someone who was held captive by your fears for another year or as someone who gave it everything they had to make real changes in their life?

Rice

if you knew me.... you'd understand just how lost I am.


Perhaps. Or maybe it was all the stuiff that got in the way that prevented me from posting.

ScottFromWI

We were all lost at one point Rice. One of the hurdles we all had to overcome was to stop thinking our problems were somehow different or harder to solve than everyone else. We may not know you but we do know exactly how you feel because we've all been there.

Rice

If you think it's all about alcohol use, then yes - you have know how i feel.

ScottFromWI

I don't think it's all about alcohol. We all have a wide range of issues to deal with - family related, health related, legal, psychiatric, the list goes on and on. Everyone has some kind of underlying problem to their addiction, usually multiple things.

What I am suggesting is that none of them are impossible to overcome, and many people have overcome incredible obstacles in their lives to beat addiction. And then they overcame the underlying issues as well.

At the end of the day though, if drinking is ONE of the problems - it HAS to be the one you fix first. And its also the one that you have 100% control over changing.

Rice

No - it's the one thing i can't change first.

ScottFromWI

You won't be able to change whatever it is, or seek help accepting that you cannot change it ( which is also an option ) until you are able to share it with someone. I hope you can find that person or resource someday.

brynn

Hi rice

I so understand having the words get stuck, or not being able to find the words at all. I think you want to talk about what's going on...besides the alcohol stuff...but are unsure of either having the right words, or still being accepted as part of this community if you do.

All I can say is that you ARE accepted here, and you will STILL be accepted here. I know that's hard to believe when you're feeling so crappy and when people haven't stuck around in the past.

So, if you can't change the drinking stuff first, what Is it that you feel you CAN change first?

Soberpotamus

Hi Rice, what are some things that you think you can change first before putting down the alcohol? What will alcohol allow you to do better than doing it sober?

Nonsensical

Sounds like there's work to be done. I'm up for it. What are we doing first?

Soberwolf

Hi Rice

Nice to see you i smiled when i seen your name

We are all here for you i know how difficult you find this

glad your here

Rice

I have always been an outsider. I am awkward and strange and only fit in with certain people. Not being aprt of this community isn't the problem - I already know that I'm not.

Why should I let people in?


We'll see.

Rice

It's probably best we don't.

Rice

Work christmas party tonght. Fun..

SoberLeigh

I really loved the people I worked with (retired a few years to care for my Mom) but the Company Christmas party was never my favorite. It was usually held after work; people were extra tired from the busy time of year; free alcohol flowed freely; lots of inebriation . . . . . .

Hope it goes well.