ghostdad

Restart - don't be too hard on yourself. I knew I had a problem with alcohol. I wanted to quit but didn't know how and I didn't want to. That all changed this year when I developed a problem with my pancreas because of drinking. I just hope you can quit before it affects your health.

As far as staying busy I started reading books and riding my bike. Our weekdays are very busy between work and raising our children. We go camping or do something outdoors on weekends.

luvmygirls

I can totally understand where you're coming from. I've gone through periods where I didn't want to quit at all, and completely resented my husband because he was "being controlling" and "making me quit" even though I hadn't had any major consequences.

Deep down, I know my husband is right. I know I'm an alcoholic, and that my life would be infinitely better if I were sober: No more sneaking, hiding, lying, etc. Much less anxiety and fear. It's exhausting, honestly.

I joined this site in the middle of September, and it's taken me this long to get excited about the possibilities of a sober life. The more sober days I can put together, the more "normal" sobriety feels, and the more abnormal it feels for me to drink. I think that's a good start.

For today, I know I'm not going to drink. If you're on the fence and want to explore some options, please join us in the November thread. If not, and you decide you're not ready, that's OK too. We'll be here if and when you need us.

Nonsensical

I had to get some hobbies to occupy my free time. I had no idea what to do with all my time when I was sober.

At first I wanted to learn more about alcohol addiction, so I read quite a bit. I have taken a few classes and started a new part-time business. Thinking about starting another business in the spring (although I have been thinking about this other one for 2 years now and I'm not really much closer than I was 2 years ago!) I also cook a lot more now.

Congrats on starting your sober life. It's amazing!

MIRecovery

I found it was easier to eliminate the people in my life that loved me because let's face it. People that love you screw up your drinking.

Eventually I drank alone with no one in my life. It was a very dark time

mns1

I think I can relate to some degree. I too, like many, have had my ups and downs. I've gone sober for months on end only to have pent up stress drive me back to drinking. I am currently in one of the downs.

I can honestly say that I both want and don't want to quit drinking. I want to quit because of the anxiety, hangovers, self-loathing, and because of the very simple fact that I know this is a bad habit to be in. But then I don't want to quit because I sometimes feel like drinking reminds me of a time in my life when I was younger and more care-free. I am 28 and by no means old, but I have more responsibilities and less time to goof around. The only difference now is that back then I drank on the weekends with my friends and had fun. Now I drink at home by myself most nights because I've convinced myself that it will somehow magically take me back in time. But then I wake up the next day and all of my responsibilities and challenges are there to greet me.

I also, like you, never thought I would be this person. But I guess it could be anyone, couldn't it?

I think the best thing to keep yourself occupied is to just do something. Anything. Watch a movie, read a book, clean the house, go for a walk, go to the gym, listen to music or, better yet, play an instrument if you are musically inclined. Just try not to sit and dwell on the fact that you are not drinking. There are so many healthier ways to stimulate the body and mind.

Good luck!