foryoumyson

Haven't posted in a while but anyways every weeks the same old story I drink I try to quit smoking i try to quit drinking. I drank last night like a fool I had 5 days in but I had 5 beers left in the fridge . I was real moody I know it's because I want to drink. So i had one then another and they was going down good so I had to run to the liqueur store and buy more then I actually needed. When I go home I'm going to pour the rest down the sink. I do it all the time I feel like I'm wasting money then I go back and buy more. But it's just not fun anymore it never really was. But while my girlfriend and my son sleep I stay up all night drinking when I should really be sleeping and getting my rest for the next day at work. No I drink to excess untill about 3am then have to get up at 6 for work...and it's just the same process over and over. I drink more then ever and never remember anything now. When I wasn't drinking for those 5 days I felt good I was quick and didn't have to think to much when asked a question or what ever. Well I'm back should of never left you can't just say I'm gonna quit tomorrow it takes a real dedication to quit. But im back on that wagon again. Should of never drank last night all day I've felt like complete crap . I was trying to do to much at once I guess and that's why I failed but my hearts never really in the quit .

Nonsensical

Learning, not failing.

Welcome back.

You can do this!

Lusher

Hey foryoumyson- Welcome Back!
Yeah, it does get old after a while. Especially all of the stuff that people like us deal with, being the way that we are. IE: Going to get more booze, after we've already had plenty- that was my life.

The five days sober was a great start. No reason that you can't get back to five days again, and even many more. You do have to be a bit committed though.

Stay strong, and I hope to see you around in here.


Lusher

Soberwolf

Welcome back

PurpleKnight

Are you getting enough support?

For me doing things on my own only got me so far and my own mind would eventually grind me down!!

Tweak your plan and go at things again!!

Anna

I'm really glad that you're back and posting.

You said that your heart is not really in the quit, and I hope that you can change your thinking. I hope that you will see stopping drinking as a positive thing for yourself and your life.

Verte

Hi FYMS and welcome back.

I agree with the PK, how about some more support in your plan?

ScottFromWI

Sometimes this is why we need to accept our fate and admit that we can't do it alone. Have you considered seeking local help like AA or some other meeting based recovery? Some of us need that structure of every day reminders and a rigid/structured framework to follow, especially at first.

Sasha4

Personally, and I can only speak for me, I think stopping drinking and smoking at the same time is too hard.

I stopped smoking 7 years ago.
I have not had a drink for over 2 years now.
There is no way I could have done them both at the same time.
Doing that would have been double misery for me.
There would have been too many deprived receptors in my brain screaming out for a smoke or a drink.

I think its better to master one addiction, than to struggle with both at the same time.

MythOfSisyphus

I'm glad you made it back to us. I hope you can figure out what's holding you back, foryoumyson. Deep down you probably know that you need to stop and why- it's in your username. Keep at it! Don't give up.

Dee74

Some good advice here FYMS.
have you thought about why it is you can't give up drinking?

D