Sublime

I've been thinking about going to AA meetings, i am tired of alcohol being an important part of my life. There are things I would like to know about AA meetings before I go. If someone would answer them. Please excuse my ignorance. My questions are based on what I have read on this site and my stepfather going to AA for 15+yrs and still not recovering.

I am not a social person. Do I have to get up and talk in front of people, and tell them my life?

If I fail/mess up and drink does that mean I will be rejected from AA. I understand a counselor can get upset if you drink that is why I ask.

Just to make it plain and simple. What are meetings like? Can someone explain them to me?

sam082602

No, do you don't have to get up and talk to anyone unless you choose to but they might ask to say your name and so you say your name, that you are new, and that you just want to listen. I am very antisocial but I do okay most of the time...there are no counselors in meetings unless they are members of AA themselves and that is not the same...Counselors are usually just for treatment centers, etc...AA will never reject you...The Third Tradition of AA states: The only requirement for membership is the desire to stop drinking....AA meetings have done me alot of good because I learn alot from the topics that are chosen and shared on in the Open Discussion meetings as well as all the experience, strength, and hope that is shared by the speaker in a Speaker meeting...Plain and simple, what is it going to hurt by going to check out a few meetings, if you like--keep coming back; and if you don't like, then don't come back until you are ready because the doors of AA are ALWAYS OPEN AND THEY SWING BOTH WAYS...Keep your chin up, my prayers are with you, love ya, keep coming back, don't leave five minutes before the miracles happen...Love, Samantha, alcoholic and addict with a clean and sober birthday of 08/26/02...P.S. Your stepfather is not recovering because he is not ready to recover but he will recover exactly when he is suppose to, besides that is his business and not yours...your business is you and you only...and everything that I have written is my opinion only and it may not be original because I may have had some of what I wrote here passed on to me by another member of AA....Good AA hunting!!

spirit

hi sublime,

as dan said, you dont have to speak, but in time you probably will feel like doing so. it is a bit like typing here, it is safe.

and where else to find people who have fallen off the wagon, but at an AA meeting haha. members are there are all times of their recovery.

the meetings i go to are fairly relaxed, we take turns to talk, if we dont want to we can just say no, or tell the chair before hand that we dont want to.

when i first started i met some of the people out the front, they were very welcoming, i told them it was my first meeting, they took me under their wing and introduced me to people, let them know i was at my first meeting etc.

try it, if you dont like a particular meeting maybe go to another one in your area. another thing i did too was i rang AA and asked my questions there, anonymously, cause i felt silly. but htose phone chats made me realise i wasnt silly at all.

good luck and hugs
kath

lin127

Hello,

welcome to this group. Keep posting there is a lot of help and sincere people here. Sam gave great advice. I too am very shy and no one pressures you into talking at aa meetings if you are not ready. This was a big fear of mine. I quit drinking without AA before and now with AA it is a world of difference. I now have hope that I can make it. Give it a try you desearve it. You will be welcommed with open arms. "bring the body and the mind will follow"
Love,
Lin

zoomer

Hi sub. I'll keep it simple. A meeting is a group of drunks that talk about their life exspericnaces and hope of the program. You do not have to say a darn thing nor do you have to make friends with everyone. If you go, go for the simple reason of checking it out. No need to go back,no need to talk. It's free,so what do you have to lose?

JaySee

Hi Sublime

I called the AA. A guy said he would meet me outside the meeting and have a chat, which he did and we chatted for about half an hour before we went in. In the meeting I just sat there and listened, didn't say a word.

There is a person who is leading the meeting and people only speak if they want to. You will never be rejected from the AA if you want to stop drinking. I've slipped and all I've received from other members is understanding and concern, no judgement.

Give them a call. I'm glad I did.

much love

JC

Rowan

Hi Sublime
It's good to see your post, and that you are considering going to AA. You've been given lots of info on what to expect from meetings, so I won't add to that. I just wanted to say how awkward and out of place I felt when I first joined the fellowship. I had a difficult time speaking, and didn't know how to connect with other people. But like anything else, given time the unfamiliar becomes familiar, you make friends, and eventually you'll be striding up to those church doors with your hand extended to greet that newcomer, or that old friend. It has truly changed my life. God Bless you my friend.
Love, Rowan

phil

Hi Sub welcome to Sober Recovery,

AA is a fellowship. As said your only requirment is to stop Drinking. They offer suggestions on a way to live life and keep from drinking by shared experience.The steps are merely levels in which you learn who you are, love, and be a respectible person again. (promising way to live) since we screwed up for so long in our past.

If you do fall and relapse! Go back How ever long it takes. Ive relasped and felt Horrible about going back, But I went and back on track.

Id suggest going to a few meetings. Different ones if possible, check out what different kind of meetings there are. Find a meeting your comfortable with. And listen, listen, listen.Your gonna here your story Im sure and your not gonna be tellin it. You will share when your ready.

And stick around these boards! Theres wonderful people here for support

1Marty

Me neither!! and no you don't have to do or say anything. Open talk meetings (speaker meetings) helped me early on when I was too scared to go to regular discussion meetings. The open talk meetings usually just have a speaker who talks for an hour about his/her experience in the program. It was a good way for me to relate and realize that I belonged there. Best of luck to you!