MatthewMills197

I had a drink yesterday after being sober for 7 months but I am not feeling anything.

I mean I’m not upset with myself, I’m not angry, I drank and I handled the drink fine and I think maybe I can drink again as long as I moderate myself. Thinking maybe I’m not actually an alcoholic but it was my mental health problems and the combo of drink that sent me nuts. Now I’m more stable mentally I’m thinking I can have a drink now and then.just my thoughts...


feedback please

MelindaFlowers

Can I ask why you stopped drinking seven months ago? Drinking too much? Too often? Couldn't stop drinking once you started?

If I had seven moths sober and I had a drink I would want more. I would have two the next day and three the next day. No moderation plan would work for me.

Would you please share 3-5 reasons that you stopped seven months ago? What would be different this time?

XIIIXXIXXVI

Let me know how that works out for you... I have mental health issues that up until recently I couldn't get under control because I'd either drink with my meds or skip them altogether. But now I'm sober and doing well - I'm overall happier, more productive, and clear-headed and I've thought a few times that maybe my mental health issues were what caused me to indulge so uncontrollably in alcohol but I'm just not willing to test the waters by trying to drink to find out. Keep us posted. Please. As someone in a similar situation, I'd really be interested in how things work out...

MatthewMills197

1. I got arrested
2. I went a bit bonkers
3. Lost my job that really loved p***ed me off

the thing is melinda i drank yesterday but i'm not going to drink today cos i have a lot of stuff to do but i'm thinking maybe i can have a drink at christmas or something

if i'm so alcholic why am i not drinking today? can you switch on and off if you are alcholic.

instant

Never worked for me. I had one night of drinking to celebrate six months once, took me years to get six months again. Never kept the promises I made to myself, even though I looked good for a little while. I hope your experience is different. Opinions don't count what happens does

HeadLump

Tread very very carefully, Matthew. Moderation is completely out of the question for most people here and if you read through the threads you'll find out why.

It could be that you're not an alcoholic and that your relationship with drink has changed, but what's more likely is because you are sober your medication is working better and you feel more in control.

I agree with Melinda. Something prompted you to give up 7 months ago and it must have been pretty persuasive. Revisit that if you can and see if it's worth taking a (possibly life threatening) risk.

MatthewMills197

thanks everyone

i drank yesterday but am not drinking today thats where my issue is. a few of you have said you couldn't stop once you started but i have, thats whats flipping my brain right now

thanks for all your replies they help me

Dee74

The great wish of anyone here is that a little time off will somehow make them into a normal drinker.

Every time I went back to drinking the first few times were usually fine - I drank like a gentleman, no embarrassments, no overwhelming desire to get wasted...

but sooner or later things always reverted to the way they'd always been.

I think sometimes alcoholism has a wicked sense of the ironic...it loved to reel me in, all smug cos I'd beaten it, and then BAM rabbit punch and I was back to square one.

Mine is not a rare story - you'll likely hear it again and again in this thread.

I think you asked here because, deep down, you know what the answer is Matthew.

You've not posted much or in any detail so I don't really know what bought you here, but if you keep drinking, I really think you're risking all that's happened before, or worse, happening again.

You can keep drinking and find out for yourself or you can avoid whatever unpleasantness is likely just around the next corner.

I really hope you make a good and wise choice, Matthew.

D

MatthewMills197

This has really made me think!thanks

Dee74

Alcoholism is a particularly sneaky addiction in my experience Matthew - it doesn't mind playing dead in order to lull us into a false sense of security.

D

MatthewMills197

Thanks everyone for your comments

MatthewMills197

BTW Dee i read a lot on here but don't post that much. came across Sober recovery website by googling about being sober

lighteningbug

If you decide to have another drink, think about your arrest and what lead you to stop drinking. It may help you to put it down.

Tang

I've been trying to moderate for years. If by moderation you mean never drinking more than 1 and not drinking everyday, I could never obtain that.

MIRecovery

NO YOU HAVE NOT!!!

Your drank successfully once. If you are alcoholic moderation is impossible. You will be back to where you were in a short period of time

Dee74

Thanks Matthew - to be clear, I wasn't having a go at you for not posting more, simply that I don't know much about your story

D

Grungehead

This!

I had a night of the "f-its" after 7 years of sobriety and it was 8 years (and near death) before I got sober again. There are never any guarantees there will be a "next time" to get sober.

FreeOwl

I did this exact same thing and came to the exact same conclusion at about six months.

Thus began a progressive and awful year and a half long descent into near-daily blackouts.

I'd say this is a really good time to get yourself a written step one, sit down and get super honest. Look back at your own history with alcohol and write it all down. Everything. Year by year.

Look at the evidence of your own story and ask yourself if this is a reasonable conclusion or a warped alcoholic mind's trick.

I know that for me.... It had to get pretty awful and I'm fortunate that I survived it.

Is pouring poison down your gullet REALLY important enough to you to risk it?

Grungehead

And to add another thought to my post above, after that one night I didn't go back to drinking "alcoholically" right away. It "felt" like I was drinking moderately and I was in control for several weeks before it spiraled out of control again.

FreeOwl

Yes. In the mid stages you can.

At least.... I could.

The trap of my alcoholism was that I could often go and just have one. I was great at giving myself 'evidence' that I didn't have a problem.... But then eventually I would wake up from a blackout. Sometimes in a jail cell.....

Arrested.. Went bonkers.... Lost job.....

Could you be similar?