Daretodream

I am struggling with feeling that I will not be able to truly experience the enjoyment and pleasure if I live a life of sobriety if that makes any sense. I keep feeling that I am "missing out" which could just be my AV talking. It has to be because going back to drinking again isn't the answer. Anyway, I am back on day 9.

FreeOwl

For me, that feeling faded.

I now realize that I was missing out all those years in a bottle.

keep at it!!

sprout50

There is a whole other life out there without alcohol and it is a good life! One without regrets, one you can be present in etc...give it time and congrats on 9 days!

fastfocus

I felt like that too, but it passes, it took me ages for it to pass but that was partly because I didn't put enough effort into my sobriety, now I feel great, I don't feel im missing out now, hope it soon passes for you

HeartsAfire

You have to go on faith for now that life is infinitely better & so much more enjoyable without alcohol. Too many others are here as a witness to that fact. Including me. You will get there too but you must stay on course.

You're correct in that it's your AV trying to convince you otherwise. Sobriety opens up to us an entire new world that we had no idea existed. Alcohol keeps us locked in purgatory until it finally sucks us into hell.

Stay in this new world with us. I promise it gets easier. And better every day.

IOAA2

Hi.
Unfortunately we as alcoholics want everything NOW. Well that’s not the way it works in general because we were in many different mode of training ourselves while we drank and a lot of it sticks like super glue and requires work and changing the person who strained so hard for the escape that many drank for. Many “reasons” or things that bothered us like anger, loss of control and on and on gave us, in our heads permission to drink.
Stopping drinking for me was one thing, long sobriety is another adventure well worth the effort.
It was said that if we don't like being sober our misery is refundable.


BE WELL

aasharon90

Fear of the unknown is tough to comprehend.
Just not knowing is scarry. In early recovery
I had to rely on my Faith that I was brought
up on and trust the system. Put my trust in
a program of recovery taught to me and hold
on tight to those who had paved the path for
me to follow to remain sober a day at a time.

I listened, Learned, Absorbed and Applied
whatever I needed and heard in meetings,
from recovery materials I read in order not
to fall victim the temptations to drink poison
that almost took me from this world too soon.

I went thru many days, ups and downs,
highs and lows, good days, unbelievable
tough and rough days. However, I wanted
to remain sober no matter what the situation
was.

I had to believe because I saw too many
in recovery were happy, content, honest,
healthy. I wanted the promises that is stated
in the Big Book of AA to come true for me.
Yes, some did come true, slowly, but surely
depending on my living the steps and principles
of a recovery program I learned early on.

Because im a slow learner it has taken me
time to receive those promises and yes at
24 yrs sober, I can honestly say many of
those promises I am living with them today.

And what a GIFT. What a Joy to enjoy and
forever be grateful for. I wanted them and
now that I can enjoy them, I stay close to
my recovery program each day sharing my
own ESH - experiences, strengths and hopes
of what my life was and is like before, during
and after alcohol to others that are still struggling
to give the hope that the Promises Will come
true depending on how we live our lives
in recovery.

I am me. Not a drunk, liar, stealer, cheater
and so much more like I used to be when I
was under the enfluence of a controlled substance.
I don't want to live that kind of life like that
anymore. My life today is simple, healthy, happy
and honest in all my affairs.

I can truly say that I am living a life of
FREEDOM in recovery.

You can too.

Choxco

Good morning! They say that the first gift of sobriety is stopping drinking - true. Then they say that there are so many other gifts that will be given if you just don't pick up that first drink.

I should be closing in on 6 months, however I am at 13 days. Like you I feared that I would be missing something if I stopped forever and thinking in terms of forever was EXTREMELY overwhelming and my AV (Sybil) wouldn't allow me to think in those terms.

This week I was out for a business dinner and everyone was drinking and having fun.....including me without the wine. It was truly the first time I was laughing hysterically at silliness and jokes and can honestly say I had a great time - SOBER.....I will take this as a second gift that has been presented.

Start anticipating all of the gifts that are going to come your way! .... Kindof like Christmas all year round for the rest of your like

I found this site a week ago and it has become a daily part of my program....keep coming back!! Good luck

aliencat

That feeling faded for me. I found productive, fun things to do with my time that didnt leave me feeling sick for days after, and I started hanging out with people who don't drink a lot. I didnt realize, but many cool people are sober or rarely drink! Not everyone's social life revolves around booze. Drinking was my main hobby and drinking buddies were my only friends. Now I have a lot of fun things to do that I look forward to all day, and people who I can have REAL conversations with that aren't dumb and shallow drunk convos. It takes time but it gets much better. Try something new, even if it sounds boring at first. Maybe write down why you stopped drinking in the first place, so you can re-read it during the vulnerable times. Just remember that a boring afternoon is better than a DUI or a nasty 2-day hangover. And remember, one day at a time. Don't worry about the long term future. Just fill today with good, productive stuff. The rest will follow.

SoberLeigh

Exactly what Hearts said.

Dee74

It's definitely your AV Dare

I have a full and activbe social life, I love my life and I love who I am. I couldn;t say that when I was drinking.

I thought not drinking would be the end of my life, a prison - it turns out it was a beginning, and a freedom I didn't expect.

I'm not blowing smoke here - I understand the fear of leaving the known behind, but it is so SO worth it

Do it

D

Daretodream

Thanks so much for the advice. Since I started this journey in June, I have really stepped up my workouts at my gym--going to weight classes and building my jogging stamina on the treadmill. I have been spending more time on my own trying to find out what I truly enjoy and, I guess, also getting reacquainted with who I am. This also involved not trying to drink away the bad feelings when they popped up.

Somehow, around day 55, my passion to quit this poison went out the window, and I went back to drinking.

Right now, I am concentrating on how not drinking is making my workout stamina 100% better, checking on SR daily and knowing that having blackouts or even mini ones every time I drink is dangerous for me.

Just have to work a bit harder on shaking this "missing out" feeling. I appreciate your words of wisdom. I will keep going back to them often.

Have a good day everyone!