Nowsthetime

Just got off the phone with her. She has ulcers in esophagus and fatty liver. She is taking her results to be read by the doc today... The thing is that after saying this she goes "but a lot of people have a fatty liver" as if it was normal. Is this true? I asked her about all the issues and she said that they are stress related but I think that it is the booze. I know that she drinks, a lot. Like me, never in the am alone, always in a party scene, but the problem is that in our country almost every scene is a party. The thing is that I am not around to see it exactly.

I don't want to say anything about drinking. When I told her I was almost to seven months she asked me "when are you going to stop counting?". (This was about a month ago.)

Should I say something? Confront her drinking? Her boyfriend also drinks a lot and is having some bladder problems. The booze can't help but still they don't see it as the harming factor.

I am scared for her but I don't want to preach at her. She's turning 60 and I know she doesn't want to hear anything from anybody. She mentioned she had 2 parties this weekend and that it was going to be "rough". I told her she has to take care of those things and left it at that. I don't know what to do.

If anything, I have learned that it is up to her... I feel impotent.

LBrain

lead by example, sometimes it's all you can do
Best wishes.

gvrecovery

Alcohol does tremendous damage to our bodies, and what you describe sounds very much like alcohol related. Not sure if a fatty liver is "normal", but doubt it very much.

anattaboy

Normal for a mid to late stage alcoholic. A lot of that could clear up good if the jug were plugged. You can be her beacon.

biminiblue

I'm sorry you are worried, and I hope she finds a way out.

phoebe64

Fatty liver can be from alcohol, and/or from being overweight, having hyperlipidemia, diabetes, and there are over 100 diseases that can affect the liver. Still alcohol, weight, and diet are way up there.

That said, 4 years ago, I had pretty severe fatty liver, inflammation and scarring but my last ultrasound(June this year) did not even show any fat. I have not been successful at full sobriety, but have reduced my drinking greatly with periods of abstinence, but I also controlled my blood sugar(was diagnosed diabetic at the same time) and lost a lot of weight.

In my personal situation, It seems it was the "hat trick." A combination of weight, booze, and diabetes. A big lifestyle change helped, but I do still need to get fully sober. I have periods of abstinence but relapse.

With any liver diagnosis, it clearly makes sense to abstain from alcohol, which is known to tax and damage the liver. Of course, for us alcoholics, that is the hardest thing to change. I did stop for several months, but it creeped back into my life once I was healthy again. I am here to work on that.

desypete

is there a problem with her drinking ? other than the problems to health ?

at 60 years of age people do start to end up with health problems caused by all sorts of conditions, i wonder why you single out the drink ?

plenty of people drink to much but its just part of there life something they are used to it doesnt mean they have a problem with it like alcoholism
now if she is getting blind rotten drunk daily and being a problem all over the place or not even functioning like a person anymore as the drink has taken control etc well thats a different picture

so try not to worry about the drinking as such and more about what it is the drs say she can do to help herself as if i went around telling people they drank to much and they dont have a problem there going to tell me to mind my own business in a rude way lol

phoebe64

You can be supportive without making accusations about her drinking. Ask her how her follow up goes, and what the doctor recommended. Perhaps find some good articles about the causes and helpful nutrition for fatty liver. Really, it takes a battery of tests to truly diagnose the state of the liver. Fatty liver is pretty non-specific as to the damage present. There is quite a spectrum, and it can change/improve dramatically if caught soon enough, if it is due to lifestyle.

sprout50

I would let her Dr talk to her about her health issues. I am sorry you have this worry but congrats on 7 months sober.

FeelingGreat

NTT, the doctor's going to spell it out for her, and she's probably not going to want to quit drinking. However your sobriety can act as an example of being healthy and happy, and also having the ability to make positive decisions for your health. Don't underestimate your influence.

Other than that, there's not much you can do if her failing health doesn't scare her into a healthier lifestyle.

Nowsthetime

Thanks guys. She has had some ugly episodes because of booze since I was little. I will be supportive and just ask her what the Dr. said. I don't want her to feel judged by me. It's her body and I will respect her desicion. I'm not going to compare her and will not compare myself. It's just scary to know that we are in different countries and if anything goes down I will not be there. I am going to her super 60 yrs old bash in January. I'm starting to mentally prepare to deal with the booze river myself. I know she's going to be wasted and that will be hard to watch knowing what know...

Arghhhhhh! I will have 8 months on the 16th. That will be my focus.

Thanks all for your responses. I feel a little better.

ThatHombre

My doctor told me that fatty liver disease is common. As mentioned, it isn't only caused by alcohol. Poor diet and a host of diseases can cause it.