Soberwolf

Im so glad your posting M your not drinking your releasing the stress and its a good thing

its a shame he cant help without you having to say something sorry M

ardy

ah another bit to the puzzle.. child with special needs.. know what you are going thro there.. so may I ask what is the type of special need.. and can you connect to a support group for that type of caregiver.. see my oldest is a type 1 diabetic and when he was little in the 80's there was not much around for help. everything came out of a book .. and his cub scout group was my only hold on reality... Mavis how can we help .. really.. good ideas come from great minds that have endured so much before you.. love ardy...

chickippo

yep, my depression is kicking me around at the moment - i think it's the clocks going back. i'm sleeping way too much and my concentration is shot.

i need to get back into swimming - it shuts my head up. be well, mavis. you're under a lot of pressure but the key is to find a way to share the load.

BarleyCorn86

Do you have a mother-in-law that can maybe take over for a day? I think you need a break. Even if it's for only a couple of hours in the afternoon to recharge and get some ME time.

You're husband gets that type of break when he goes to work and gets to socialize with other adults. Even though he still has to work, it makes a huge difference on your outlook when you can get out of the house and interact with other adult or take time for yourself.

MavisTheFairy13

Thanks everyone. I sometimes feel that the load isn't shared as I do everything for our son but my husband works long shifts and when hes at home he's the best father. My son started full time school in september so that helps, he's 4 and autistic and can't talk or feed himself or drink himself and doesn't sleep well. We have no family support at all. We get 2 hours respite a week through a care agency but that's the only help we get. I think we are both tired and cranky, we've been out together for a night out twice in the last 4 years. Finances are tight and I suppose we are both stressed.

SoberLeigh

((((Mavis))))). You have a lot on your plate.

DoubleDragons

Mavis, I was in the WORST mood possible yesterday. I was ready to take most of my immediate family, many friends, my employer, my extended family, etc. put them in a giant ball and drop kick them all out of my life. It wasn't any one big thing, it was just of a bunch of aggravations happening all at once. I was weepy, exhausted, hurt, defeated, angry, scared, crazy etc. etc. I am over a year sober, so luckily, no SERIOUS thoughts of drinking crept in, but little thoughts of escape were floating around.

So, last night, I said "no" to meeting my husband for exercise. Because I didn't want to do it, and I didn't want to resent it as a "should." I sulked, I got into my pjs, I read a lot on SR, I went to bed early and today, I feel SO much better. Wow, feelings, like clouds always do pass.!!! In fact, I am in such a good mood, that I noticed that everyone around me, such as work people, or people who have helped me at voting and at stores, are responding to me in a very favorable light. Nothing situationally has really changed from yesterday. I am just in a better "place" for whatever reason. I have learned it is okay to feel like crap. It is even okay to give in to it a little bit because the tide always turns. It will turn faster for you, if you let it happen naturally and don't try to make it happen with poisonous chemicals that will only hurt you in the end. Take care!!!

luvmygirls

I can totally relate to this, Mavis: I am seriously far more stressed when he is at home than when he's at work. I work full-time, but I am "first responder" for my kids's needs. When he's home, I am responding to said kids' needs, plus his needs, plus (I feel) I have to justify everything I'm doing and how I'm doing it!!!

Just for today, let's not drink over it, OK? (((hugs)))

JanieJ

Mavis (((())))) wish I could comfort you better than this. You lead a stressful life chick.

Sorry to hear your depression is getting to you

We all want to see that 7 day post tomorrow Xxx

Treerat66

Hello Mavis, sorry your man is moaning, just stay on the wagon.

Hawks

G'day Mavis

You have many friends here who understand the "get stressed, drink" cycle and the remorse that comes next morning.

I've been through years of it, 10 year old with ADHD and other learning difficulties and 3 daughter's age 7,5 &3.

My wife and I bickering over stuff and me taking shelter in beer.

It just makes you more crazy and less able to cope.

Heads fuzzy, stomach churning and on top of all that, you still have to parent and be a good Mum or Dad.

Breaking the cycle is damn tough but very very worth it, I promise.

All the best Mavis