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A little intro

Old 11-04-2014, 07:34 AM
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I will NOT drink to that!
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A little intro

Hi Everyone!

My name is Monica & I live in Maryland. I am 37 years old, married for 5 years, & have a 3 year old daughter.

I don't even know where to begin. I have struggled with codependency almost all my life. I started my journey of healing in 2003. I started going to counseling, attended healing workshops, got out of toxic relationships - I was getting to a point where I was really liking myself! I was making better choices in men & was getting real good at cutting people out of my life.

All of that changed when I got with my husband. We started dating around September of 2008. I started drinking with him, something I rarely did. I was never much of a drinker before I got with my husband. We started dating & I started drinking with him. First, the drinking was on the weekends when we would see each other. Then as time went on, he moved in & we drank every single night together. Our drinking wasn't just a few cocktails, we would get $hit faced drunk together.

As time went on, I started gaining weight. I no longer was eating right & working out anymore - I was drinking. My husband still hung out with his old friends & would stay out all night drinking - coming home well after 8am. He had emotional affairs (by keeping in contact with other females & hiding it from me) & was an awful husband all together. My codependency wouldn't let me leave him though.

Fast forward & I find out I am pregnant. I immediately stopped drinking & started taking better care of myself. My husband kept drinking & I realized that when I wasn't drunk with him, there was a real disconnect in our relationship. Basically, our relationship was based on alcohol! I didn't have another drink until our daughter was like 5 months old. I started drinking again & it became a nightly thing all over again.

Now, I am trying to do better. I haven't had a drink in over a week. I realized I was drinking entirely too much & started cutting down from everyday to couple times a week. But then it hit me, that isn't enough I need to stop all together - hence, me not having a drink in over a week.

I have gotten my books out & will start re-reading them. My all time fave is "Codependent No More", I have started reading that all over again. I have gone to counseling through my job's EAP & am on a path to regaining myself all over again.

I hope I didn't bore you with my story! Hoping to make new friends & offer support when I can. I will definitely need support as well. Thanks for listening.
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Old 11-04-2014, 08:45 AM
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Welcome, Monica! Thanks for sharing your story! You'll find a lot of support here!
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Old 11-04-2014, 08:46 AM
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Hi Monica
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Old 11-04-2014, 08:53 AM
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Welcome Monica! SR is a great site!
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Old 11-04-2014, 09:16 AM
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Hi Monica thank you and a big welcome to SR and the forum

Well done on over a weeks sobriety keep reading keep posting
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Old 11-04-2014, 09:23 AM
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Thanks so much for the warm welcome!!! I will be needing all the support I can get. This place rocks!


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Old 11-04-2014, 09:30 AM
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Monica, welcome to SR and congrats on a week sober! I look forward to hearing more from you.
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Old 11-04-2014, 09:41 AM
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I'm glad you've dusted off your books and plan on reading them again. I find reading self help books extremely helpful, but you really have to apply the knowledge you learn and practice it on a daily basis to form more positive habits. That's what worked for me, anyway!
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Old 11-04-2014, 10:24 AM
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Welcome to the Forum Monica!!
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Old 11-04-2014, 11:41 AM
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I will NOT drink to that!
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Originally Posted by Judas View Post
I'm glad you've dusted off your books and plan on reading them again. I find reading self help books extremely helpful, but you really have to apply the knowledge you learn and practice it on a daily basis to form more positive habits. That's what worked for me, anyway!
Oh yes, I am back on it. I did the work before, so I just need to do it again. I really lost myself when I got with my husband. Our relationship is much better but he is still drinking on a daily basis. So I am on my own with my recovery.
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Old 11-04-2014, 11:44 AM
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Welcome, Monica! I am 42 and WISH I would have quit drinking 10 years ago. Good for you on one week...that's great!!!
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Old 11-04-2014, 11:47 AM
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Welcome, there are a lot of double winners here *raises hand.

There is a great "Friends and Family of Alcoholics" section for the codie side.

here:

Friends and Family of Alcoholics - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
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Old 11-04-2014, 11:49 AM
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I will NOT drink to that!
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Originally Posted by biminiblue View Post
Welcome, there are a lot of double winners here *raises hand.

There is a great "Friends and Family of Alcoholics" section for the codie side.

here:
I will be checking that out too. Thanks!!
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Old 11-04-2014, 02:45 PM
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Welcome to SR, Monica. Glad you found us.
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Old 11-04-2014, 02:53 PM
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Welcome Monica - great to have you here

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Old 11-04-2014, 03:31 PM
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Welcome, Monica! I think you will find what you need here.
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Old 11-04-2014, 03:41 PM
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Welcome to the family.
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Old 11-04-2014, 03:45 PM
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Hi!
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Old 11-04-2014, 04:39 PM
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Very happy to meet you Monica. You found a great place for friendship and support.
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Old 11-04-2014, 06:06 PM
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Hi sweetheart! Sorry life is tough right now! It will get better! Glad ur here
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