My rock bottom that finally landed me here.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Newport beach, CA
Posts: 52
My rock bottom that finally landed me here.
I feel the need to be honest about my last week I was drinking. No reason, other than confirming my rock bottom and my choice in sobriety. I was drinking morning until night. High functioning but bloated and moody. A few days beforet "day 1" I woke up and decided to go on a ride around the neighborhood ony mo-ped. I absolutely became frantic at the idea of enjoying the beautiful day without my usual glass or two of am wine. I remembered my stash of about half a bottle of saki in my car, and knew that I would be able to maintain a decent flow of alcohol in my system to enjoy my ride. (All scary thoughts, I know.) well, I had half a bottle of wine on my counter. It was a half from the night before of a second bottle. Even though it was 8 30am there was no way I would engage in anything enjoyable without heightening the experience. To me, half a bottle of wine and a few sips of saki was just right. I drank a quarter of the bottle of saki and left the last part of it as a reward for the end of my ride. I cruised around the neighborhood having a blast. A bit more adventurous than usual, but still pretty high functioning. Well I entered a busy street because it was the fastest way back home...no helmet, no ***** given. On a moped you gas and brake sort of opposite of a beach cruiser. I guess I got a little comfortable and in the clouds mixed with anxiety and being buzzed on a busy street that I actually gassed instead of braked as I turned into the lane. I lost control and flew forward off the moped as I braked violently and landed head first into oncoming traffic. A car missed my head by six inches. I was bruised up and terrified as I rode home. I, of course told people who saw my bruises that the bike "fell over on me" which it did as a white lie, but I was and am far too ashamed to speak of it for some time. I needed to get this off my chest because it was my final straw and it confirmed my suspicion that I lost control rapidly over a few months. I knew it would only get worse, and I can never chance a substance again. Lucky for me, I realized that alcohol was depressing me.waking up over the past two weeks has actually been a giant relief for me and I am comfortably and firmly sober from here on out. Thanks for reading. Every word was painful to write,but I felt mentally able to face it after these few weeks of sobriety. I am so blessed to have narrowly escaped all of this and I am just grateful to be in a position to actually live my life again. The one that alcohol literally almost took.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Northern Ireland
Posts: 290
Thanks for sharing. I drove whilst drunk many times. If it was near closing time I would even drive right past our local police station - totally insane!
You sound as though you're in a good place at the moment, best of luck and have a long happy recovery
You sound as though you're in a good place at the moment, best of luck and have a long happy recovery
Life is an unlikely miracle.
Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: England
Posts: 1,859
Glad you survived , Escape, and thank you for sharing your story.
Yes, I have drunk driven uh. a "few" times over the years. Madness.
One time, and this was one of the times that added up towards stopping drinking, I got to the pub to see a band at 12 noon. I was in the pub until five, drinking beer. Then something to eat. Then back to the pub til about 8pm. At this point I had a coffee, like that would sober me up !! Then I drove through a major city, then a half hour drive in the county to get home. On the way I stopped to buy wine. I also gave a friend a ride home. WTF ??
A few years ago, my band was gigging on St Patrick's Day in a local pub. The plan was to drink after the gig and then sleep in my car. We were drinking whiskey til about 4am. The others got a taxi home. I went to the car, it was too cold to sleep, so I drove home.
After this one, I stopped drinking at all at gigs.
Half the time I don't remember how I drove home at all, how scary is that.
So grateful that I didn't kill anyone or myself, such irresponsible and downright selfish behaviour on my part :-(
Yes, I have drunk driven uh. a "few" times over the years. Madness.
One time, and this was one of the times that added up towards stopping drinking, I got to the pub to see a band at 12 noon. I was in the pub until five, drinking beer. Then something to eat. Then back to the pub til about 8pm. At this point I had a coffee, like that would sober me up !! Then I drove through a major city, then a half hour drive in the county to get home. On the way I stopped to buy wine. I also gave a friend a ride home. WTF ??
A few years ago, my band was gigging on St Patrick's Day in a local pub. The plan was to drink after the gig and then sleep in my car. We were drinking whiskey til about 4am. The others got a taxi home. I went to the car, it was too cold to sleep, so I drove home.
After this one, I stopped drinking at all at gigs.
Half the time I don't remember how I drove home at all, how scary is that.
So grateful that I didn't kill anyone or myself, such irresponsible and downright selfish behaviour on my part :-(
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