Why cant I just give up
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: huntsville ar
Posts: 39
Why cant I just give up
Long story.... Posted here a long time ago n back again. Ineed help
First time here my husband of 17 yrs left home to find out he had been doing meth a long time. To make a long story shorter we lost everything...home he lost his job he had for 20 yrs. Gone for 10 mths begged to come back. Stupid me let him. Moved out of state thinking this would make him quit.He was clean a year then 1 day gone again. Relasped a few more times? Moved again.Grown kids moved with us . My son n my 2 beautiful grand children !my daughter n my husband n mine son. Hes relasped 3 more times. Killing me again.. 3 months ago my oldest son that has custody of my grandchildren had a severe brain bleed that caused a stroke. Come yo find out he had been doing meth with my husband. Now hes paralized .2 weeks later my husband is gone again for 3 days. Comes home says he cant keep doing this to me anymore. Says he loves me but is moved to his own apartment n im here 3 mths later taking care of my paralized son his children n i work. Thats my life now n i dont deserve any of this. Weve been togeather28 yrs n this is all i get.? Husband says he has to fix himself. How can i miss this man n still love him when he left when i needed him the most? Why cant i just let him go? Its like im obsessed with him n meth. Feels like my life is over now. Work take care of my son n grandkids n start all over again the next day. Im hurting so bad!!!! Need some help plz. I hate this drug. I hate all drugs
First time here my husband of 17 yrs left home to find out he had been doing meth a long time. To make a long story shorter we lost everything...home he lost his job he had for 20 yrs. Gone for 10 mths begged to come back. Stupid me let him. Moved out of state thinking this would make him quit.He was clean a year then 1 day gone again. Relasped a few more times? Moved again.Grown kids moved with us . My son n my 2 beautiful grand children !my daughter n my husband n mine son. Hes relasped 3 more times. Killing me again.. 3 months ago my oldest son that has custody of my grandchildren had a severe brain bleed that caused a stroke. Come yo find out he had been doing meth with my husband. Now hes paralized .2 weeks later my husband is gone again for 3 days. Comes home says he cant keep doing this to me anymore. Says he loves me but is moved to his own apartment n im here 3 mths later taking care of my paralized son his children n i work. Thats my life now n i dont deserve any of this. Weve been togeather28 yrs n this is all i get.? Husband says he has to fix himself. How can i miss this man n still love him when he left when i needed him the most? Why cant i just let him go? Its like im obsessed with him n meth. Feels like my life is over now. Work take care of my son n grandkids n start all over again the next day. Im hurting so bad!!!! Need some help plz. I hate this drug. I hate all drugs
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,434
Hi Jodi - I moved your post here for more support and feedback 
I'm really sorry for what brings you here but I know there's a ton of support around, both here and the friends and family forums
D
I'm really sorry for what brings you here but I know there's a ton of support around, both here and the friends and family forums
D
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: C.C. Ma.
Posts: 3,697
Hi.
I’m sorry about your situation and will strongly recommend reading on this site “friends and Families” FORUM.
That along with attending Al Anon meetings in your area will help you through this difficult period.
BE WELL
I’m sorry about your situation and will strongly recommend reading on this site “friends and Families” FORUM.
That along with attending Al Anon meetings in your area will help you through this difficult period.
BE WELL
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
I'm so very sorry this drug has broken your family.
Please reach out to someone in your area as well as us here.
Social Services can help you with your son and his care. Talk to everyone about it, there will be help.
You are very strong and you will be okay.
Please reach out to someone in your area as well as us here.
Social Services can help you with your son and his care. Talk to everyone about it, there will be help.
You are very strong and you will be okay.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: British Columbia
Posts: 129
OMG!! I'm so sorry that you have had to deal with that for so long. You've been such an amazingly and strong courageous support for this whole family. So hard to hold things together when Meth is involved.
Although I've never used it (thank Goddess) I have studied about it and I knew a young man at rehab who was addicted. He was staying in rehab for 6 months to try to get over it. I heard his stories - and they were really far out. Nasty is what it is and you've had to deal with the fall out.
Please my dear, it is time to put yourself first - it's the only way. Begin to pull out and away and hold on to yourself. I would say go to Al-anon, it has been a real support to my DH (that's dear husband). You say you love this man? you love him but is it reciprocated? Love yourself - it's not selfish to love yourself. It is what you must do now - love yourself and set strong boundaries.
((((HUGS)))))
Although I've never used it (thank Goddess) I have studied about it and I knew a young man at rehab who was addicted. He was staying in rehab for 6 months to try to get over it. I heard his stories - and they were really far out. Nasty is what it is and you've had to deal with the fall out.
Please my dear, it is time to put yourself first - it's the only way. Begin to pull out and away and hold on to yourself. I would say go to Al-anon, it has been a real support to my DH (that's dear husband). You say you love this man? you love him but is it reciprocated? Love yourself - it's not selfish to love yourself. It is what you must do now - love yourself and set strong boundaries.
((((HUGS)))))
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: huntsville ar
Posts: 39
Got some help for my son. Hes got medicaid so they sent a cna to care for him while were at work. He needs 24 hr care. How did i end up here? U A W ..?united auto workers came today n built a wheel chair ramp for free. Im so grateful. Tried to build one myself but it didnt work out so well. Talked with AH today he says hes trying to fix himself but dont think hes going to go to rehab. Hes trying to do it himself. Im so confused because its like he talks in riddles. I want him home but i want him clean. Craziness surrounds me. Cant sleep n when i awake racing thoughts running in my head. Sometimes i wish i could get in my car n drive away n not look back. Will i ever get over this? I dont think so
Member
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 43
hi there!
i'm so sorry for what are you dealing right now, it suc*s, i know it, i know what are you going through right now. but please stay strong. try to stay away in a bottle for this day, then, do it again tomorrow. as what they say, 1 day at a time.
i'm so sorry for what are you dealing right now, it suc*s, i know it, i know what are you going through right now. but please stay strong. try to stay away in a bottle for this day, then, do it again tomorrow. as what they say, 1 day at a time.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: huntsville ar
Posts: 39
Ive made an appointment for a therpist n found found a naranon meeting next wendesday. Hopefully my daughter can get home to stay with my son.Its pretty far away but im willing. Wish i could find one closer. With so much meth addiction around u would think they would be everywhere.. Got a dr appointment on monday to get something for anxiety. Being with my AH for 23 yrs n him being gone now feels like ive lost an arm r something. Feel so bad. I think sometimes it would be easier if he had died. Doesnt that sound crazy?
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