Talk of Christmas party at work.......
 

.......,is filling me with dread! All I have said so far at work is I have stopped drinking for now as I am fed up of binge drinking at weekends (no one knows how bad it was in the week for me!) and that I am saving money in the process. I keep being asked if it is for stoptober (to raise money for charity) and how folk can sponsor me! When I say no, it's for me, I get an odd look and the conversation moves on. This was all ok, but now work party's are being arranged and I feel obliged to attend. The issue is that everyone remembers how I was always one of the last handful standing and always up for more booze and on to somewhere after the meal that served til late before staggering home to my poor partner who was dreading my mood and state I would be in after spending a couple of hundred pounds! But hey are talking of how ace this is and how they can't wait to have a good session with me!

I am just not that person anymore and don't want to go back to it! One option is to cover whoever is on call so they can drink. How have you guys got around this?

Just say you dont drink

you dont have to explain yourself

You'll have a lot more sobriety behind you by then - am sure you'll cope :)

You're under no obligation to attend. Keep yourself safe first and foremost x

Totally agree with Soberwolf but for myself different situations call for different reasons!! With family I say i don't drink & that is never a problem but when I'm out with friends or co-workers I use the Roseacea or Gout excuse!! LOL Only trouble is I get 20 questions on the ailments!!! so have to be clued up!! To be honest it dosnt bother me if I did say i don't drink but I just get fed up with people keep asking just have one at least one, with Roseacea or Gout it nips it straight in the bud.. & people don't bother me..

You could always get there half an hour later than the others - by then, they won't notice or care what you're drinking. OR, get there early and get a soft drink and sip it so slowly, that they give up asking if you want a drink.
Millions of ways around it, if you want them :)

My story is acid reflux. I take meds for it anyway and I know all about it. Howeveer, the more important thing is will you be able to handle it? Make a decision as the date approaches. If you feel that it will be too difficult and you're not ready, make an excuse and don't go.

why buggirl?

D

I'm not going to my work Xmas party. But at my work it's not really required or expected anyway. If it's on a Friday, maybe you could say you're going out of town for the weekend.

Take everyone else out of the equation and do the thing that is the kindest and most helpful to yourself.

Buggirl you are doing this for you and you are worth doing this for. Last year was my first sober Christmas in a long time, I went to nothing that could be described as a booze up although I did go to some gatherings that had a different focus. I sailed through the Christmas period feeling great and staying sober.

Nobody's job description says they have to attend an annual booze up. If necessary show your face while you have a soft drink, then slip away - nobody will be the wiser. If not necessary then don't go, stay home and do something for you or go to the movies with a friend.

I once invited a recovery alcoholic to come to a christmas party, she said "I don't drink anymore, but have a good time". Nothing more to say, it was cool. She was the best worker we ever had after she quit drinking. She relapsed several times, but never stopped trying to get sober. I really wish she still worked for us, she became sober and started her own business.

Stopping drinking, for life, isn't easy. Most people fail. I, and many others here have been doing it successfully for decades now however, and while I used to wonder why, certain things are becoming really apparent to me.

When I stopped drinking, it was a matter of life and death. And I respected and treated it as such. In my first year of sobriety, if something was even the slightest bit of a threat, I stayed away. I missed parties, I walked out of places without saying goodbye to anyone if I felt uncomfortable, and I didn't give much thought at all to what I "might have been" missing. It was the party, or my life. Being cautious and staying away from people, places, and things that might make me want to drink was incredibly important. In the beginning.

Because of the importance I put on all that in early sobriety, I was able to build a solid foundation. In retrospect it was a tiny investment that yielded unfathomably huge returns. And it didn't mean that quitting drinking meant my life was over. That I'd never have any fun again. It meant the complete opposite. Because of those tiny little sacrifices I made in the beginning I feel I was granted a life of complete freedom from alcohol. I go anywhere I want now without concern over my picking up a drink. And it's pretty much been that way since after my first year or 2 sober.

How badly do you want to remain sober? How important is this party? How important will this party seem 5 years from now? Is not drinking a matter of life or death for you? It might not be at this point, but if you really want to be successful at sobriety, it might be a good idea to treat it as though it were. For me it was clear that it was. Stuff like this was a no brainer for me. My sobriety was my #1 priority, and still is, though I don't have to treat it in the same way as I did in the beginning.

The only thing only thing we have to do is stay sober. The rest are choices either good or bad

Buggirl,your sobriety needs to come first.If you feel at all worried about this party don't go,it is that simple.You can just say no,no explanation necessary.

It is not about what others think of you,it is about you protecting yourself.

If you decide to go,make sure you have an escape plan and remain vigilant.

I went to our office Christmas party when I was just over three months sober, thinking I was obligated to go. I was very uncomfortable, which I would have masked before by drinking. I didn't. I ate, got my five-year pin, and got the heck out of there.

Haven't been to one since.

Christmas parties are not manditory. Don't jeopardize your sobriety out of some sense of obligation. Work certainly won't be there to pick you up when you fall.

Our work Christmas party is mandatory, but that is the nature of sales orgs. I drank coke at the last one.

The nice thing about being an alcoholic is that I am under no obligation to do anything that will interfere in my recovery :D. My sobriety will ALWAYS have to come first.

I stopped going to my work Christmas parties years ago. Even while drinking they were just not that fun. Sober, they would be excruciating. I say don't go if you don't absolutely have to. Plan a better evening instead and use that as a reason if you feel you need one. Because you don't. You owe an explanation to no one.

I'm with Ruby on this. I know people over the years when asked if they are going to THE xmas party would respond, 'Why do I want to hang out with people I see every day and make me miserable.' It was the one day out of the year the bosses pretended to care.