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I'm trying to believe you

Old 10-28-2014, 12:49 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Briar - I think you can safely believe in SR, I mean the alternative is, that we've all united to play some massive practical joke on you
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Old 10-28-2014, 12:53 AM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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I had no faith in myself when I came here Briar - and if I'm honest not for a long time after either...but I did have faith and trust in the community here when they said everything would be ok if I stuck to the recovery path I was on.

They were right

To sit here and have bad days and not panic... knowing it'll be ok, to truly feel happy and at peace...with no sign of self hatred...those things are miracles to me.

But they're real, they happen - I promise
Stick with us, ok?

D
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Old 10-28-2014, 01:16 AM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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((((((hugs)))))) we are all here to support each other x
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Old 10-28-2014, 01:45 AM
  # 24 (permalink)  
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this is the sole reason i love aa and some of the people in aa, when i was in the mess i was in at the begining of recovery, some of the members would come and sit with me and keep me company, they would come and sit with my in my flat so i wasnt so alone etc, they would take me around meetings and help me to start a new way of doing things, i will never forget those days as i wanted them around me but i was to scared to ask anyone or tell anyone how i was really feeling
lucky for me i didnt have to say anything as these guys had been there, they knew what its like being on your own with no one to care for you
in fact i know today just how much my own mess helped them to feel grateful for there familys and wives that they still had so out of there feeling of gratitude they bent over backwards to help me

without those guys i wouldnt be here today i know i would of been out on the streets homeless and dead by now

instead i have a second chance of life i have my kids living with me today something i never ever thought would happen when i was in that dark world its my proudest moment of my life is the day the courts gave me my kids back, and thats all down to those guys who spent so much time helping me in the early days

hence i would always offer up aa and the meetings for anyone else as there are people in those places that really do go that extra mile and help others

there are also people there who dont and they just like the sound of there own voice and knowledge but even they help with things they can say as its all good

another major problem i had was letting people help me as my pride would rather not bother people with my small problems and i would deal with them myself
my way of dealing with things was to shut off from everyone and sit on my own and worry about things

when i learned to open my mouth in aa and start to talk about things i could feel the problems lift from me, they might not solve them but they sure did help me how i felt about them

so thats really all i can offer up to you is maybe give aa a try and hopefully you will meet people there who really understand just were your at and will help you

by the way there help is also at times a kick up the back side to get me moving rather than sitting there feeling low as again they know as they have had to sit there feeling low and getting a kick up there own backside as well lol

good luck to you there is help for you but you have to let people help you whatever way you go
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Old 10-28-2014, 05:46 PM
  # 25 (permalink)  
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Hi Briar. I care! A day late, but I read your posts yesterday and they stuck with me. I didn't have the time or energy to respond then, but I want you to know that I said a prayer for you last night and hoped that you'd make it through and feel better. I'm sorry you relapsed and felt awful, but I remember your earlier topic about "what would we do now, AV". Very clever and very true. Reread your posts. Now your addiction started raging again and feeding you nonsense, but you can fight it back. And anytime you feel weak, you should know there's a real person out there that cares whether you make it. Melki cares, and many other people here care. Feel free to send me a private message anytime, it is never a bother. Post as much as you want, do whatever you need to do to fight it back. You can do it, and we care!
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Old 10-28-2014, 05:53 PM
  # 26 (permalink)  
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When I tried to do this on my own, I went round and round in circles, I even had a 1 year gap between joining SR and coming back with my tail between my legs, and guess what? the door wasn't locked and I was welcomed back with open arms.

The power of this place inspired me to make the changes necessary to finally turn my life around, that's the strength of SR, people all around trying to do better, turn their lives around and, those that have been there and done it, the wisdom confined within this virtual world is immense and I knew if I could somehow tap into it, achieve only a shred of what those who had gone before me, then my life would change for the better.

In the end I had to take a leap of faith, and guess what? everything I had read in numerous threads came true!!
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Old 10-28-2014, 06:19 PM
  # 27 (permalink)  
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You guys are so kind. Your support and encouragement is helping me through another hard day. Thank you.
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Old 10-28-2014, 08:22 PM
  # 28 (permalink)  
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Relax, friend. Read, post, enjoy the forum and community. With luck the rest will follow.

No way to know if it will help or not help; better to just say "I don't know if it will help, but I hope so."
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Old 10-29-2014, 03:24 AM
  # 29 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Briar View Post
Thanks for responding to me. You guys have some good advice that makes a lot of sense. I'm trying to hold it in my mind. A couple people asked about my history. I've been working on recovery for the past two years. Last year I got sober for seven months but lost it about a year ago when I got depressed and withdrew from the people around me. Over the past year I've quit a handful of times but never could get it. I've been in therapy with an addiction specialist for two years, on SR, and during this past month I've been attending LifeRing meetings (which I missed last week because I was drunk). I am fortunate to have a lot of resources and support available to me, and I feel like a real jerk for drinking anyway. I do want to quit. I want a better life. I don't know why I keep sabotaging myself.
You keep sabotaging yourself because you are addicted to alcohol. There's no need to try and 'figure it out'. I tried to do that for years.

There's also no need to believe us.

All you have to do is see for yourself.

If you don't drink today....
If you post and share here today....
If you go to an AA meeting today....
If you read the big book today...
If you go for a walk or to the gym today...
If you have healthy nutritious food and water today...
If you say 'thank you' when you onto bed today...

Then you can judge for yourself the quality of today.

And you can wake up tomorrow and choose again, based on your own experience.

You don't have to believe us.

Just try it.....

Maybe you'll come to believe something of your own.

Don't give up.
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