RCnut

Got the courage to finally talk to someone, you guys, about something I knew was becoming a problem. Right now it's a small problem compared to some I have read. I'm in my 40's, have 2 kids, and have decided I need to start taking better care of myself. Drink just about everyday for I don't know how long. Not every day, and not too much every day, but enough to know it's a problem. I had plenty of wine yesterday, maybe a bottle and a half, I know that's nothing to you guys, but enough to get drunk, fall asleep and recover, and then share a bottle with the wife at night. I rarely get hungover. I never black out, but I do fall asleep on the couch frequently. The last time I was hungover was a few days ago and I did not drink the next day even with alcohol in the house. The next morning I felt fantastic which lasted a few hours till I drank again. This probably does not sound like much of a problem to you guys, but right now I am feeling anxious from not drinking. Been doing stuff around the house to keep me busy and that helps. I don't think I am going to have any severe withdrawal symptoms cause a few weeks ago I hurt myself and stopped drinking for a week while I took pain meds. I've rambled on long enough for now. I just wish I could share one bottle of wine with the wife and not want MORE, a lot more. I have hobbies that I am not enjoying because I drink in my leisure time. Fortunately it has not affected work, and I want it to stay that way. I don't drive drunk.

least

I don't think it matters that much what you call it, what matters is what you do about it. If drinking is causing any problems, better to give it up. I've never woken up sober and wished I had drank the night before.

If you decide to stop drinking, you'll find lots of support here.

Gilmer

I'm similar to you. I drank at home, and usually ended up sleeping it off of my own volition. I did drink to get drunk, and I wouldn't stop till I was. Eventually I craved it every day.

Many people associate the word "alcoholic" with a skid row drunk living in a cardboard box; that wasn't me, but I consider myself to be an alcoholic, because once started I can't stop. No matter what you call it, that's a problem.

You yourself know you've got a problem. I had to give it up all the way, because I couldn't stop at "just a couple."

Ruby2

Well, drinking alcohol is affecting your life whether you are an alcoholic or not. It's not up to me to say whether you are an alcoholic or not. Drinking made me miserable and like Least said, I never wake up in the morning wishing I had a hangover from the night before.

For me the only solution was to stop drinking, period. I could never have just one and stop. I wasted hours and days, anxious until I had a drink in my hand. It just stopped being worth it.

So, welcome to SR. Stick around, read the threads. Come for support.

Hawks

Drinking problems can range from mild to wild.

If your hands & wrists were covered in a rash ..... would you think ...

"I reckon I'll just sit back & wait till I am covered from Head to Toe and this rash is getting really septic ..... then I'll go seek medical advice" ??

Mark1014

Hi RC, It's one thing to debate the label of alcoholic....and that's not for me to say. I can tell you that this is a great place to get your feet on the ground. Maybe you should consider leaving off the alcohol for a while and really focus on your health. I will say that those with a 'normal' relationship probably don't have to think about it. I like chocolate cake, but after a piece or two I'm satisfied. I don't care if there is cake available and if someone told me I could never have cake again I make consider it a bummer but I wouldn't put much more thought in it. Welcome to this site and let us know how you're doing.

gippy1968

Hi RC,

In my opinion, if you think that you have a problem with alcohol, then you probably do. Please be very careful in comparing your alcohol intake with that of others. There is no standard as to what defines a drinking/alcohol issue - everyone carries different standards and circumstances.

SR is a great place to be - welcome!

RCnut

Weekends are spent drinking instead of some other productive activity, be it work or play. I never take my son to fly airplanes (models) on Sunday anymore cause I have been drinking. The house is full of unfinished projects cause I drink. I never watch movies anymore cause I fall asleep cause I drink. So its a problem. I took today off and have no alcohol in the house (hope the wife does not bring any home). On the one hand I feel great, on the other, very anxious and REALLY want a glass of wine. I love red wine, kind of a foodie and I cook and wine and cooking just go hand in hand for me. I think a wine bottle is perfect cause it's a small treat for 2 people, just the right amount. For most people it is, but when you buy 6 bottles cause they're on sale... Well that didn't last long. I know what happened. I had stress years ago from a life change and I unknowingly self-medicated with alcohol and it became a habit. Year after year I thought it was not a problem because I never "craved" alcohol. Now I do. And quitting smoking too. Those damn thinks are expensive and they stink! My chest and head feel clear but I feel awful.

RCnut

Do I need to be concerned about withdrawal symptoms? I was off alcohol for a week recently and was ok. I can deal the anxiety I have now. I drank about 1 bottle of wine a day on average. Damn cheap Chilean wine ruined my life!

Meraviglioso

Hi and welcome. There is no competition here, I don't think anyone would dare judge what is "a lot" or "not a lot" we are all here for the same reason because we have a problem that we want to deal with. Each of our problems might differ, but they are all problems to us.
I remember talking to someone about the fact that I was worried about my drinking and they said "ah, come on, it is not a problem, everyone gets drunk sometimes" and other unhelpful things. I said "look, even if I am drinking one glass of wine, once a month, if I am uncomfortable with that and I feel like it is a problem then it is."
Glad to have you here.

Soberwolf

Welcome to SR

It was a couple of things you said

Drinking around everyday

Drinking a bottle and a half of wine and not thinking its too much because your idea of an Alcoholic drinks a lot more

Anxious because your not drinking & not enjoying your hobbies because of drink

You wish you could just have 1 bottle and not want more A LOT MORE

RCnut

Yeah, there it is, it's not the amount. It's enough to get me drunk and it is keeping me from productive activity.

@ Soberwolf, Whoa, did I type that? I meant a drink or 2 and stop, not a whole bottle. I know that's too much.

Soberwolf

Good luck friend

Fly N Buy

RCnut - you're the only one to really determine if alcohol has become a serious problem in your life and for those around you. Based on your posts, alcohol is getting in the way of things you want/need to do.

Most people don't scroll around the internet looking for answers to drinking and join recovery forums unless they believe it's a problem. "Normies" simply do not think about it......

As you have noted, alcoholism is a progressive issue. It get's worse never better. Perhaps you should feel fortunate to recognize it now instead of later.

Glad you're here and hope you find the answers you're looking for!
fly

RCnut

That's the thing, I know it's getting worse. I don't want to wait till something bad happens. Shouldn't the body be able to process a drink an hour? How come sometimes after 8 hours of sleep I still feel it? This is not a common occurrence but it has happened a few times just up late by myself drinking. Worried about possible liver damage.

gottostop38

Hi, don't post too much here but you have described me a few years ago, I echo all the comments on here, if I could have my time again I would stop, now. Replace wine time with the things you have realised you are not doing anymore. Good luck.

silentrun

I like the term drinking problem better. It sounds like you know you have one even if you are not yet addicted. Yeah don't wait until you are addicted. It's that feeling of wanting more that finally got to me. I realized I would never be able to satisfy that urge. Good for you taking care of this now.

5KRunner

Alcoholism is progressive.

Also, it's tough to compare what is a problem for one person versus another because we're all different.

If you suspect you have a problem, the safest solution is to quit. There are so many benefits.

I wish you the very best, RCnut!

Hawks

One way to look at it, is to say we have an "allergic reaction" to alcohol.

An allergy simply means "abnormal reaction" to anything, food, beverage, additives, pollens etc

If someone eats strawberries & gets an itchy rash .... allergic reaction

If someone eats peanuts & their face swells & their limbs puff up ...... allergic reaction

Allergy reactions can be low, medium or high reactions.

I get low reaction to pollen, nose runs a bit, few sneezes .... but its nothing severe.

So .... if we look at the "normal" reaction to alcohol ... one or two glasses .... not interested in any more, couldn't care less if they drank again tomorrow or next week or next month.

My Mum is like that .... take it or leave it.

I LOVE the taste of beer .... I used to drink lots of it.

I also LOVE orange juice, but I never did sit down to drink half a dozen glasses in one sitting .... never. One or two glasses of orange juice .... Ahhhhh ..... lovely, that'll do me.

I LOVE Coca Cola too, I buy it in 24 packs .... but I never sat & drank 12 cans of Coca Cola .... not once.

I have an allergic reaction to alcohol .... once I consume a couple of cans of beer .... allergy kicks (craving for more) and I drink till I fall asleep.

so2014

I have two thoughts. First, if you are drinking TO get drunk, that's a problem. Even if it only takes a glass or two of wine. I used to drink a glass or two of wine. Then half a bottle, then a martini, then most recently I decided it took too long (and made me too full) to drink wine/beer, so I just did shots. Like 10 a night. So if people say its progressive, it is. If you can walk away and not drink for a month and not feel bad/crave/think about alcohol all the time, then you probably don't have a problem. Do you think you can do that?

Part two is that this addiction involves a lot of thought. When drinking, I'd think about WHEN I could drink - i.e. are kids in bed yet? Or am I at least home for the evening? Can I start now? I'd worry about whether there is enough to drink- hated finishing a bottle of wine only to find out there was no more. I'd wake up in the morning thinking about how I was NOT going to drink that night. I'd spend half the day thinking I"m not going to drink, then get over the hump and start thinking WHEN can I start. So the point is, if you spend more than about 5 minutes a day THINKING about alcohol, then that's a sign there is a problem. A lot of people never give it a thought one way or the other.

So now I'm a few weeks sober and I still think about it A LOT and want it a lot, so I've confirmed for myself its a problem. I don't think about chocolate this much. I don't think about food this much. I don't have problems with those. But I have a problem with alcohol.

Also, in terms of saying "nothing bad has happened," my sponsor says to finish that sentence with "yet." Because if you have a problem, it doesn't get better on its own. It gets worse, and bad things can and will happen.

Good luck, though, and this is a good place to read about other peoples experiences.