I made a good decision yesterday
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 1,324
I made a good decision yesterday
So yesterday was our neighborhood's block party. Lots of live music, food and, of course, alcohol. I'd been working in the yard all day and a cool one sounded so good, which is exactly why I didn't get within 100 feet from the party. I'm just too new in my sobriety, and these are precisely the situations where I tend to fall down (it has been almost two weeks, my AV whispers. Just one drink, she coos).
So instead I sipped a diet tonic and fresh meyer lemon juice (my new beverage of choice). After a bit of a rest, I took the dogs out for another hike. I'm sure they are confused; where did she get all this energy
Have a great day everyone!
So instead I sipped a diet tonic and fresh meyer lemon juice (my new beverage of choice). After a bit of a rest, I took the dogs out for another hike. I'm sure they are confused; where did she get all this energy
Have a great day everyone!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,236
The longer you remain sober the more
ways you will find to avoid situations
that would make you feel uncomfortable.
We are suppose to enjoy sobriety, laugh,
have fun, but not if things in life makes
us uncomfortable.
For me, being around folks that are
drinking, under the influence of a
controlled, poisonous substance, makes
me uncomfortable, so I avoid attending
functions where it is available.
Today I have to take care of my own
peace of mind, health and sobriety to
enjoy a good quality of life.
ways you will find to avoid situations
that would make you feel uncomfortable.
We are suppose to enjoy sobriety, laugh,
have fun, but not if things in life makes
us uncomfortable.
For me, being around folks that are
drinking, under the influence of a
controlled, poisonous substance, makes
me uncomfortable, so I avoid attending
functions where it is available.
Today I have to take care of my own
peace of mind, health and sobriety to
enjoy a good quality of life.
Living Sober
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 555
Hey matilda123, that's huge what you did. You should feel very proud, especially with all of that temptation.
I tend to feel a bit of anxiety when these type of functions are coming up. I was invited to a 4th of July party, as well as a Memorial Day party, this past Summer. They were hosted by the same family and are a big deal, however these are also notorious for being booze-bashes as well.
I couldn't do it. Not so much because I was afraid that I would drink, but more because I'd be thinking about how much more fun I'd be having if I did, thus killing the party for me. I elected to abstain from even attending either party myself.
It does suck to feel like you're missing out, but for me it's just the price of being a problem drinker. Plus I, as I'm sure you too, would be so disappointed if you (we) 'blew it.'
Also, as I'm sure you know, when your sober, the silly conversations and jokes tend to get old pretty quickly. So then I have to ask myself if I really missed out on anything or not.
You have a goal and you stuck to it. Nice job!
I tend to feel a bit of anxiety when these type of functions are coming up. I was invited to a 4th of July party, as well as a Memorial Day party, this past Summer. They were hosted by the same family and are a big deal, however these are also notorious for being booze-bashes as well.
I couldn't do it. Not so much because I was afraid that I would drink, but more because I'd be thinking about how much more fun I'd be having if I did, thus killing the party for me. I elected to abstain from even attending either party myself.
It does suck to feel like you're missing out, but for me it's just the price of being a problem drinker. Plus I, as I'm sure you too, would be so disappointed if you (we) 'blew it.'
Also, as I'm sure you know, when your sober, the silly conversations and jokes tend to get old pretty quickly. So then I have to ask myself if I really missed out on anything or not.
You have a goal and you stuck to it. Nice job!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: New Orleans, LA
Posts: 985
Yaaay, you!
And I can't think of any happier activity than tons of dog hiking...healthy, joyous, and you get to witness dogs exploring nature, which is as wonderful as watching toddlers eat cake.
I'm in my third month, and I'm finding that I am getting better at granting a higher value to those healthy joyous activities than the drinking ones; it was a subtle shift.
I ask myself each time (my real self - not my AV - I'm getting better at telling them apart) "What do you want to do right now?" Interestingly, the answers are things like "yoga" or "sit in front of the fire and check SR on my phone" or "cook root vegetable casserole."
I think that my real self is getting savvy to the realization that when I choose those activities, I get to reap rewards for hours - here I am eating the food I cooked, now my body feels loose and energized after exercise - but if I power through a drinking event sober I end up nervous and muscle tense, even though I manage to "not drink."
There are some things I simply have to go to (work receptions at conferences, for example), but at those, I tell myself (and it is true) that I prefer being sober because I "work the room" with focus, and appear "sharp and clever."
But, even if you find yourself at the boozy block party type events, there is usually an elder or a youth to connect with, many folks don't drink much, and I simply have to avoid my tendency to immediately connect with the "real drinkers" - (damn, our radars are powerful!) I don't enjoy them anymore. If I have to choose between them and the hike, the hike wins (and not because I'm supposed to, but because that is truly what I most want to do...).
So, good on ya. That choice-choosing is a muscle, and it gets more toned every day. Soon it begins to surprise you with its easy strength during the heavy lifting...
And I can't think of any happier activity than tons of dog hiking...healthy, joyous, and you get to witness dogs exploring nature, which is as wonderful as watching toddlers eat cake.
I'm in my third month, and I'm finding that I am getting better at granting a higher value to those healthy joyous activities than the drinking ones; it was a subtle shift.
I ask myself each time (my real self - not my AV - I'm getting better at telling them apart) "What do you want to do right now?" Interestingly, the answers are things like "yoga" or "sit in front of the fire and check SR on my phone" or "cook root vegetable casserole."
I think that my real self is getting savvy to the realization that when I choose those activities, I get to reap rewards for hours - here I am eating the food I cooked, now my body feels loose and energized after exercise - but if I power through a drinking event sober I end up nervous and muscle tense, even though I manage to "not drink."
There are some things I simply have to go to (work receptions at conferences, for example), but at those, I tell myself (and it is true) that I prefer being sober because I "work the room" with focus, and appear "sharp and clever."
But, even if you find yourself at the boozy block party type events, there is usually an elder or a youth to connect with, many folks don't drink much, and I simply have to avoid my tendency to immediately connect with the "real drinkers" - (damn, our radars are powerful!) I don't enjoy them anymore. If I have to choose between them and the hike, the hike wins (and not because I'm supposed to, but because that is truly what I most want to do...).
So, good on ya. That choice-choosing is a muscle, and it gets more toned every day. Soon it begins to surprise you with its easy strength during the heavy lifting...
My brain is trying to kill me
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Palo Alto, ca
Posts: 401
That's how many of us do it, one thing ata time time; whether it be an event, a meeting/interaction, a moment, a day, a concert, a dinner, being alone, It's just that one thing for now, the next will come and we will take care of that. Future "tripping" leads to all sorts of things creeping into our mind and creating things-that are not real nor will they ever become real.
Way TO GO!
Way TO GO!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 1,355
Originally Posted by Altoids 
"After a bit of a rest, I took the dogs out for another hike. " Happy dogs. YAY for you and your energy, and for putting yourself FIRST! You rock!
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,759
, I took the dogs out for another hike
I find that if I'm depressed or anxious, a good dog walk usually makes me feel better. Plus, I love watching them 'checking their peemail'...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 1,324
Thanks everyone! The encouragement is so appreciated.
Just got out of a brutal meeting that, in days past, would have driven me to drink. I actually could feel myself getting very tense and thought, you know, it isn't worth it. When I got home I thought, heartcore, about your advice: what do you want to do right now?Really, what I want to do is have a good dinner (carne asada is bubbling in the crockpot) and then get in my pajamas and watch some bad tv. So, I guess that is what I'll do.
Just got out of a brutal meeting that, in days past, would have driven me to drink. I actually could feel myself getting very tense and thought, you know, it isn't worth it. When I got home I thought, heartcore, about your advice: what do you want to do right now?Really, what I want to do is have a good dinner (carne asada is bubbling in the crockpot) and then get in my pajamas and watch some bad tv. So, I guess that is what I'll do.
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