Hello - Newcomer
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: New York
Posts: 59
Hello - Newcomer
Hello everyone 
This is my first post on this website. I just wanted to say hello and introduce myself. A couple of weeks ago I have decided to quit drinking, and today I have 39 days.
I am a 28 year-old female and have been drinking heavily for the last 4 years (every single day and when I started drinking I could NEVER stop until I blacked out). I knew for quite some time that I had a serious drinking problem and fully aware that I was an alcoholic, but did not really know what to do or how to stop. I could not imagine a life without alcohol. On top of this, I am a very high-functioning alcoholic, very successful...even though I was drinking heavily every day, I was doing a great job in school, at work, had lots of friends - which actually exacerbated the problem because I would be able to assure myself that despite drinking way too much, I was still able to have a "normal" life (looking from outside). Lately though, things just started getting to a point where my body could not handle it anymore...and I was so sick and tired of this. So I decided to quit.
When I attempted quitting cold turkey, I had horrible withdrawals and it was the scariest thing I have ever experienced. Despite all this, it is really, really hard to imagine my life with no alcohol at all, but I try not to think about it and take it one day at a time. I feel so much better already, physically and mentally, and I really hope I will keep doing this...It's just crazy that I KNOW alcohol is the worst thing for me, and if I resumed drinking like I used to, I do not think that I will have my health, family, friends, or career...Still, it's just too hard to imagine. I try to go to AA meetings regularly, and I am grateful for that.
Anyway, I have been reading the posts here as a visitor for a while and I think most of the comments here are encouraging and informative. That's why I decided to join this website as a support system and I am looking forward to this journey with you all and learn from your experiences...
This is my first post on this website. I just wanted to say hello and introduce myself. A couple of weeks ago I have decided to quit drinking, and today I have 39 days.
I am a 28 year-old female and have been drinking heavily for the last 4 years (every single day and when I started drinking I could NEVER stop until I blacked out). I knew for quite some time that I had a serious drinking problem and fully aware that I was an alcoholic, but did not really know what to do or how to stop. I could not imagine a life without alcohol. On top of this, I am a very high-functioning alcoholic, very successful...even though I was drinking heavily every day, I was doing a great job in school, at work, had lots of friends - which actually exacerbated the problem because I would be able to assure myself that despite drinking way too much, I was still able to have a "normal" life (looking from outside). Lately though, things just started getting to a point where my body could not handle it anymore...and I was so sick and tired of this. So I decided to quit.
When I attempted quitting cold turkey, I had horrible withdrawals and it was the scariest thing I have ever experienced. Despite all this, it is really, really hard to imagine my life with no alcohol at all, but I try not to think about it and take it one day at a time. I feel so much better already, physically and mentally, and I really hope I will keep doing this...It's just crazy that I KNOW alcohol is the worst thing for me, and if I resumed drinking like I used to, I do not think that I will have my health, family, friends, or career...Still, it's just too hard to imagine. I try to go to AA meetings regularly, and I am grateful for that.
Anyway, I have been reading the posts here as a visitor for a while and I think most of the comments here are encouraging and informative. That's why I decided to join this website as a support system and I am looking forward to this journey with you all and learn from your experiences...
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,760
Congrats on 39 days sober.
That's a good start to a better sober life. When I first quit drinking I couldn't imagine what I'd do without drinking. Now I can't imagine drinking. Being sober is amazing and makes my life worthwhile.I'm glad you joined us. You'll find lots of support here.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 6,831
Originally Posted by least 
Congrats on 39 days sober.
That's a good start to a better sober life. When I first quit drinking I couldn't imagine what I'd do without drinking. Now I can't imagine drinking. Being sober is amazing and makes my life worthwhile.I'm glad you joined us. You'll find lots of support here.
Living Sober
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 555
Hey margherita,
You and I are a lot alike.
This is what I struggled with the most. I'm 14 months off of the drink, and I still struggle with it. Not so much the need for the alcohol per se any longer, but more with keeping with a lifestyle that is not centered around it.
It does take some effort, and I think you've found a great resource here.
Hope to see you around often.
You and I are a lot alike.
...really hard to imagine my life with no alcohol at all
It does take some effort, and I think you've found a great resource here.
Hope to see you around often.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,859
Welcome to SR, margherita. Congratulations on 39 sober days!!!!
I know that it is hard to imagine a life without alcohol but if you stick with it and you may find that a sober life can be incredibly wonderful.
I know that it is hard to imagine a life without alcohol but if you stick with it and you may find that a sober life can be incredibly wonderful.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: California
Posts: 2,693
Originally Posted by margherita
Hello everyone
This is my first post on this website. I just wanted to say hello and introduce myself. A couple of weeks ago I have decided to quit drinking, and today I have 39 days.
I am a 28 year-old female and have been drinking heavily for the last 4 years (every single day and when I started drinking I could NEVER stop until I blacked out). I knew for quite some time that I had a serious drinking problem and fully aware that I was an alcoholic, but did not really know what to do or how to stop. I could not imagine a life without alcohol. On top of this, I am a very high-functioning alcoholic, very successful...even though I was drinking heavily every day, I was doing a great job in school, at work, had lots of friends - which actually exacerbated the problem because I would be able to assure myself that despite drinking way too much, I was still able to have a "normal" life (looking from outside). Lately though, things just started getting to a point where my body could not handle it anymore...and I was so sick and tired of this. So I decided to quit.
When I attempted quitting cold turkey, I had horrible withdrawals and it was the scariest thing I have ever experienced. Despite all this, it is really, really hard to imagine my life with no alcohol at all, but I try not to think about it and take it one day at a time. I feel so much better already, physically and mentally, and I really hope I will keep doing this...It's just crazy that I KNOW alcohol is the worst thing for me, and if I resumed drinking like I used to, I do not think that I will have my health, family, friends, or career...Still, it's just too hard to imagine. I try to go to AA meetings regularly, and I am grateful for that.
Anyway, I have been reading the posts here as a visitor for a while and I think most of the comments here are encouraging and informative. That's why I decided to join this website as a support system and I am looking forward to this journey with you all and learn from your experiences...
This is my first post on this website. I just wanted to say hello and introduce myself. A couple of weeks ago I have decided to quit drinking, and today I have 39 days.
I am a 28 year-old female and have been drinking heavily for the last 4 years (every single day and when I started drinking I could NEVER stop until I blacked out). I knew for quite some time that I had a serious drinking problem and fully aware that I was an alcoholic, but did not really know what to do or how to stop. I could not imagine a life without alcohol. On top of this, I am a very high-functioning alcoholic, very successful...even though I was drinking heavily every day, I was doing a great job in school, at work, had lots of friends - which actually exacerbated the problem because I would be able to assure myself that despite drinking way too much, I was still able to have a "normal" life (looking from outside). Lately though, things just started getting to a point where my body could not handle it anymore...and I was so sick and tired of this. So I decided to quit.
When I attempted quitting cold turkey, I had horrible withdrawals and it was the scariest thing I have ever experienced. Despite all this, it is really, really hard to imagine my life with no alcohol at all, but I try not to think about it and take it one day at a time. I feel so much better already, physically and mentally, and I really hope I will keep doing this...It's just crazy that I KNOW alcohol is the worst thing for me, and if I resumed drinking like I used to, I do not think that I will have my health, family, friends, or career...Still, it's just too hard to imagine. I try to go to AA meetings regularly, and I am grateful for that.
Anyway, I have been reading the posts here as a visitor for a while and I think most of the comments here are encouraging and informative. That's why I decided to join this website as a support system and I am looking forward to this journey with you all and learn from your experiences...
Your post jumped out at me because my experience was very similar except I am a few years older than you at 32 and drank a few more years than you. I also did very well at work as well as graduate school even in the depths of my drinking. No DUI, arrests. Not even any serious loss of friendships or family. I was holding it pretty well together (from outside, like you) but inside I felt like I was dying. Isn't it amazing how we can walk down the street and look pretty normal to most people but we're probably battling a crippling hangover? So glad we don't have to do that anymore.
I highlighted a few parts of your story that I could relate to the most. I was also fully aware that I had a huge problem, that I was an alcoholic, while drinking every night. I was never in denial either. I was fully aware but just kept going. I guess that's what addiction really is: you know it's bad for you but you keep doing it anyway. For me, I always had a plan to stop....tomorrow. Just one more night or numbing myself then I would really get it together, right?
I also had (and still have) a hard time picturing a life with no drinking, ever. I reached the point where continuing to drink became scarier than stopping so I stopped about three months ago. Even though I don't want to drink, it's still feels like such a big part of my life is gone. I'm filling the void with the normal, daily stuff that normal, healthy people do. Even watching evening network TV sober at first felt like a small victory!
The only thing to compare it to, like we often do, is leaving an abusive relationship. When someone leaves their abusive partner, it doesn't mean they don't miss them terribly for some time. The clarity comes very slowly but it does....
I think about drinking (not actually thinking about doing it, but just pondering what my life is like without it) much, much less than two months ago when I was a month in. It slowly just becomes a non-existent part of your life. I always wondered this myself: If someone has been sober for, let's say five years, they couldn't possibly think about drinking every day, could they? They might think of it sometimes but you kinda move on with things and alcohol is not one of them.
It's still tough here at three months but I can tell you that everything is better. I couldn't survive one more day at work hungover. Never again!
You've found a great place here!
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