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Old 10-14-2014, 08:30 AM   #1 (permalink)
Sober since October
 
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Two Years Sober


Hi, SR friends!

I've already kind of posted on every possible thread here about this milestone, and yet I am posting a new thread about this.

Today I feel like a sober happy puppy - like jumping, and being silly, and carrying on.

Though I still have a lot of issues to deal with, a lot of 'inner and outer" work to do. But it will wait... for today.

Today is my own Independence Day.

Two years ago I made the first step to break my co-dependence with past, pain, wounds, fears, and wine.

It's been a tough and sometimes painful "surgery" - but it was absolutely worth going through.

A few of my friends here know what kind of pain I had inside, how deeply scarred my soul, and how bad I was crippled by this. The kind of pain that at some moment put me on the verge of suicide.

It's not uncommon to see here, in newcomers' section, a post like 'I don't know how I would cope with pain not being able to numb it with alcohol/drug any more"..

That was my case - I was mortally scared my pain would kill me. Crash me, burn me out.

It didn't.

But it would probably will if I didn't stop my "wining".

Yes, when I ditched wine for some time I felt like I jumped off the plane without parachute not being sure if I develop the "promised" wings after all.

I finally did - not so fast, maybe, but on my way hanging to "parachutes of support" of my friends here.

I was alone 2 years ago - no support in real life. But it made me stronger - now I know that I can count on myself. That I am not bored on my own. Great feeling!


2 years...cliche - but seemed like it was yesterday.

Sometimes I feel like nothing changes.. but..NO!

It all started with me posting here.

One "small" step - fingers on the keyboard, and the whole new world just a mouse click away.

Here's my Sobriety Achievement Digest:

- FINALLY stopped running from past wounds and pain. Faced them and brought to surface and light to deal and leave behind where they belong.

- bought my own apartment!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- sold my car to start sorting out financial issues;

- Finally sought help about major depression, saw a phsychiatrist, got medicines prescribed, and feeling WAY TOO MUCH BETTER now!

- Still learning to face challenges not like disasters but like opportunities. Hard science - but freaking exciting as well!

- Gained back my physical shape, lost about 5 kilos, got back to 6-times a week training schedule;

- Started doing boxing last July. Was a complete newby and was laughed at (still the only girl in my boxing class). Applied "one day at a time" and "what doesn't challenge you, doesn't change you" methods. Pretty much like in sobriety. Last Friday while doing mitts with my trainer a new guy watched us and commented: "Wow. What a jab!".

- Completely eliminated sugar and salty junk food 1 year ago;

- Finally ended binge-eating/overeating two months ago;

- Made friends with people whom I had been afraid to approach.

- Started meditating.

- Took care of my health issues. I experienced some quite worrisome moments a month ago, but difference in my attitude to "not so good" news was drastic compared to "before sober".

- In most situations replaced "why me?" with "what can I learn from this situation?". Not easy to practice sometimes, but helps a lot.

- Went to alco-free vacations and enjoyed them immensely!

- And more ...


My message to all the newcomers would be:

DO NOT BE AFRAID!


Make the first step - and tomorrow will take care of itself. Once today at a time.

My sunny, happy, positive vibes to you!
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Old 10-14-2014, 08:33 AM   #2 (permalink)
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What a wonderful post, MB! Congratulations on a battle well-fought!
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Old 10-14-2014, 08:39 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Wow! Love your story! Really inspirational congratulations on 2 years
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Old 10-14-2014, 08:40 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Congratulations, and thank you for the advice!
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Old 10-14-2014, 08:43 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Awesome post, you sound so strong in body and mind! Thanks for the inspiration!!!!
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Old 10-14-2014, 08:51 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Congratulations and thank you, MidnightBlue!

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Old 10-14-2014, 09:08 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Hi Midnight you made your milestone and i made mine feels good doesnt it

massive well done Midnight big big hugsyour way lady
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Old 10-14-2014, 09:09 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Thank you for sharing. Way to go.
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"I Can Do All Things Through Christ Who Strengthens Me" Philippians 4:13.
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Old 10-14-2014, 09:15 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Congrats, and thanks for the look forward to 2 years! Your hard work has paid off
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Old 10-14-2014, 09:24 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Congrats! Great post!
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Old 10-14-2014, 09:29 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Congrats on two years sober.

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Old 10-14-2014, 09:32 AM   #12 (permalink)
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Congrats!

I can do all things through he who strengthens me
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Old 10-14-2014, 09:38 AM   #13 (permalink)
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That is a great post, congratulations on your amazing strength! Thanks for the inspiration!!
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Old 10-14-2014, 09:45 AM   #14 (permalink)
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A phenomenal achievement and a fantastic post, Midnight. So very proud and privileged to be sharing some of this journey with you
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Old 10-14-2014, 09:48 AM   #15 (permalink)
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awesome post!
thanks for sharing that and CONGRATS ON TWO YEARS.
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Old 10-14-2014, 10:04 AM   #16 (permalink)
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Congratulations, MB. Keep powering on.

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Old 10-14-2014, 10:07 AM   #17 (permalink)
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Very inspiring, MB - congratulations! It's nice to follow your progress through your posts
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Old 10-14-2014, 10:14 AM   #18 (permalink)
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What an amazing post. Thank you and congratulations!
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Old 10-14-2014, 10:47 AM   #19 (permalink)
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Thanks, MB, and congratulations! You show us all what's possible.
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Old 10-14-2014, 10:56 AM   #20 (permalink)
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I know that you have struggled at times MB.
But you have persevered.
You have my utmost respect.
Sing, dance and be happy.
Twerk if you must!!!!!!!
You deserve every minute of it.
G
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