ArtFriend

A couple months or so ago, I got a call from a man I dated 100 years ago. He moved to Austin to work at Dell. He wanted to get together with me here in Dallas (about 200 miles north of Austin). I was pretty loaded when I talked to him and said it would be great to see him, yeah come on up to Dallas, etc.

So he calls last night and asks if he could drive up this Thursday and spend the weekend AT MY HOUSE! Being sober when I took his call this time I was very hesitant. I said I was going out of town this weekend (not true)...it was the only thing I could think of. I barely remembered asking him to come see me.

So, he is going to call again... he will be persistent. I cannot believe he assumed he could stay with me. I don't want to hurt his feelings, but....

Dumb things you do and say when drunk!

Gilmer

Could you just level with him? "Look, I was really drunk when I talked to you originally. I hardly remember what I said. To tell you the truth, I'd just as soon not get together again. Please forgive me!"

Findingtheway

Sounds like the direct and honest approach would be the answer to me.

It's best to do whatever you need to protect YOUR sobriety.

hopeful4

I would tell him you don't let folks stay at your home, that is an invitation for trouble. The sooner you spell it out the better you will feel about it.

Good Luck!

Hawks

Honesty is a good policy. Tell him...

I was drinking when we talked.
Sober, I don't think what i said was such a good idea and I've reconsidered.

Anna

Wow, he is bold, isn't he!

I would simply say 'I've thought it over and I'm not comfortable having you stay here. If you are in town, maybe we could meet for coffee?'

ArtFriend

Yes, Anna, I thought the same thing! I guess I will have to be as bold as he is and tell him not to come up. I feel badly, but he can't just waltz in here like that and think he can stay with me.

biminiblue

It was really liberating to me when I learned that
#1. I could say NO.
#2. I could change my mind at any time for any reason or no reason.

Ta Da.