Sulu1

Hi guys,

Just to give you all an update, im sober again. Doc has checked me over and says I should be over the worst now. When I first rang they recommended I had another drink and taper (think this is common practice in the UK now)! I see the thought process behind it, but I know if I start trying to taper ill just continue to drink and prolong the agony.

I'm going to see an addictions specialist tomorrow which I am looking forward to. I obviously need to sort out my long term anxiety problem, the littlest things set me off. They might only happen once every few months or so but I definitely need some more therapy work on how to control it. I need to get a balance on my work life as well which has been tough. I seem to work at 200mph, won't have a lunch break or anything. Obviously not healthy.

I'm geared up to go again. I learn more and more about what I have to deal with. My goal has always been complete abstinence. I need to be accountable for my actions and stop looking for excuses to drink. I somehow need to stave them off when the going gets tough.

Thanks for the support the other day guys, I needed to reach out.

SoberLeigh

Glad you were able to see your dr. Hope it goes well with the addiction's specialist tomorrow, MrG; keep us posted.

Cecilia44

Just thought I would comment on this remark in the post because it jumped out at me: I wish I knew what the switch is that finally makes the effort stick.

While I do agree that at some point you may just get sick and tired of being sick and tired and decide to give it a "real effort," there really isn't a "switch that makes the effort stick." It really is just one day at a time and plugging away, slowly that makes it "stick."

I think since we are addicts the black and white thinking of 100% this way or 100% the other way is the way to go, but what I think may be hard for us is to realize that balance is what we should be seeking in life and not a quick fix or switches either on or off.

I guess what I am trying to say is that quitting drinking is a process that involves each and every day staying sober, not just a "flip of the switch" and suddenly we are "cured" from drinking.

I received this quote in my Inbox and I think it sums it up:
Our daily effort may seem inconsequential, but our big break is the result of all our todays well lived.

SoberLeigh

Great quote, Cecilia; thanks for sharing that.

Sulu1

Thank you Cecilia, I appreciate that.

audra

Do you know how many people never even try? It's the only way to finally get to where you want to be. I'm very happy you will be pouring that stuff down the drain (metaphorically speaking) and I wish for you an encouraging 24.