bunnezjp

A few weeks into my Sobriety, I was talking to my dad. Out of the blue, he said "it bothers me that you can't ever drink again." At the time, I thought, "Really? Who says that to an alcoholic?"

I've thought about that, and thought about drinking more as a priviledge than a given right. When I was in college, it was definitely nice to go to a bar and legally order a drink when I turned 21, as opposed to sneaking around with a fake ID, and legally buy it at a store when I wanted to. But, just like the priviledge of having a driver's license, you can lose that priviledge.

So, thinking back on my dad's thought, I have lost the priviledge of drinking, and I accept that. I abused drinking, and abused myself. I will say that there are little things that I miss, like enjoying a cold, fall cider on a day like today. However, at the end of the day, it doesn't bother me much that I cannot ever drink again.

Thoughts?

Happy OctSober 5

Bunnez

luvmygirls

That's a really interesting way to think about it. For me (very new to sobriety), if I thought about it that way I might be tempted to believe that I could earn it back, through good behavior. At this point, I like to think about it as an allergy or something less social and more...physiological?

PurpleKnight

Very good perspective Bunnez, that's a new one for me, I've never thought of it like that.

It would definitely be beneficial to get over the hurdle of those thoughts of it's "a right" to drink, and how dare I can't drink like a normal person, all those resentments we can have.

Loosing the privilege of driving must be accepted in the same way, or the consequences can spiral if we continue to do so!!

Soberpotamus

I did think it was my "right" to drink the way I wanted, when I wanted... especially since most of my drinking was done in my home, privately. Yes, I absolutely saw it that way.

Scary, how we defend our "rights" in the face of disaster. I knew it was doing horrible things to me mentally, physically, emotionally... and even spiritually. Yet I clung to my right. I think it woke me up to see that my isolation and private drinking was going to ruin my marriage. I was ruining myself, but it wasn't fair for me to ruin my husband's life with me. He would have been forced to leave or to put up with it. I couldn't live with that.

sparklingwater

Interesting! My only thought about that is privilege has a positive connotation to me. I personally equate alcohol as a poison to my body and that has freed me from the urge to drink.

With that said, if thinking of drinking in those terms work for, I think that's awesome!!! I'm sorry your dad said that to you- I've had friends say similar things and it's clearly not helpful.

Hawks

I always thought drinking was a right.

I now see it as the privilege of non alcoholic folk.

FreeOwl

My thought; it's a far greater privilege to be able to truly, deeply appreciate a hot apple cider on a fall day like today, and to savor all that an enjoyable sober hot apple cider represents.

mfanch

Regardless of what it is, I fulfilled my quota and am no longer eligible. lol

ScottFromWI

I'm with mfanch, I cannot drink alcohol because I'm an alcoholic. Whether it is a right, a privilege or anything else is irrelevant to me.

Soberwolf

I seriously dislike alcohol it has zero appeal now im sober and awake

alcohol is ****

Aellyce

Well it was also my privilege to be edgy, eccentric, irresponsible, and mess with other people's mind. And some people expressed that I no longer do it enough, for whatever reason. Not sure I'll listen.

MythOfSisyphus

He probably meant no harm but that's the kind of thinking that kept me drinking for at least ten years after I first realized I should stop. It seemed like sobriety would be a daily sacrifice I'd have to make for the rest of my life, a horrible burden like insulin injections or dialysis. Obviously I was a moron! Because not only is it not like that it's just the opposite; sobriety is the freedom of having to fix every day. Drinking was that burdensome, inconvenient thing I had to do every day.

Besides, insulin injections and dialysis are things that improve/save your life, not destroy it like drinking did.

bunnezjp

Thanks all for your comments .

I'll leave it with this: Sobriety is my favorite gift, priviledge, and right. Ditto that for Life.

Bunnez

Alchemist1978

Living and Life for me is a privilege! Not dying from being an alcholic. So drinking for me is not a privilege but a Curse!

FormerDrunkGuy

You and Scott hit the nail on the head there, ain't that the truth.

anattaboy

I hear you Bun. 'Twas more of a rite-of-passage for me. By age 14 I was already looking forward to the legal age cuz it meant I could do what I want. Coupled with the buzz I felt more alive and that "this is what it's like to be grown up and have no rules". Mix that with some teen rebellion and angst and you have fertile ground for growing a drunk. Like others, my lifetime stipend was used up by age 30. Non-alcoholics have a hard time understanding the progressiveness because they don't experience it.

herradura

I like the quota and stipend approach. Never heard it before. I like to fish, but I never go over my limit of fish, as it is poaching. I think a good response to people asking you why you are not drinking is, "I don't poach" and then change the subject. If they press which no one will, then just go with the, met my quota lone time ago, don't want to exceed the limit.

anattaboy

OMG--and if one more person tries the whole diabetes=alcoholism thing I think I will be forced to blog and type a 6 month allocation of words.......

ghostdad

I never gave it much thought - I grew up with alcohol. I guess you could say I took it for granted rather than thinking of it any other way. It was always there and readily available like a warm blanket on a cold winter night.

All these years I felt I had it under control and I swore I would never let alcohol get the better of me - boy was I wrong.