brad13

1 day sober almost 2. Right now the depression and self loathing are suffocating. I want to curl up and die. but i wont drink today

Meraviglioso

Hi Brad and welcome. I think a lot of us can relate to those feelings. I can tell you from experience, drinking only makes it worse. If this is your first time attempting recovery you are in for a treat. It is different for everyone, but most people find that each passing day they feel better. Depression, anxiety and other physical symptoms still pop up. But remember alcohol is a depressant and you are more likely to feel worse when alcohol is still in your system.
Check in and read here as much as you can and let us know how we can support you.
Congratulations on your decision and best of luck.

Wastinglife

I've been there many times! The depression and self-loathing are gonna be strong for a few days. Your brain and nervous system are outta whack from the booze. I usually felt better by day 3 or 4

nuffsEnuff

Right there with yah! You detoxing alright?

sprout50

The self loathing will pass believe it or not. Be kind to yourself in these early days of recovery. It does get better.

Treerat66

Hi Brad,

Welcome to SR

EJ43

Hi brad! You are now one day closer to feeling better!!! I found in those first few days eating lots and lots of ice cream helped. It helped satisfy the sugar cravings and let's face it, it's lots of ice cream, it makes you feel better and you need it! Clear your schedule as much as possible and just hang in!

Thomasthetank

I second the ice cream motion. =D

PurpleKnight

Welcome to the Forum Brad!!

hopefullylost

I'm in the same boat, Brad. Binge drank Saturday night. Had a couple yesterday to ward of serious withdrawals but I will not drink today.

I hate myself today. It's a beautiful day outside but I'm inside feeling sorry for myself, searching forums for...something...help maybe? I'm not even sure what. I guess deep down I know I need to stop drinking. I'm scared this feeling will wear off and I will be back to chugging beer by the weekend.

brad13

not really any DT's just very depressed and sometimes i want to say screw it and go slam a 12 pack

brad13

wow that is such a mirror of how i feel. i said those same words to several of my friends and family and even though they are supportive i dont think they truly get it. I binge drank saturday knocked out a whole 30 pack i know i need to quit.Dont get me wrong i want the "want lay down and die feeling" but i dont want to forget what got me to it. from what ive read we with probably both have our slip ups but i know i can never get back to what i felt saturday. i called myself a worthless piece of **** 30 beers in a row and drank every one of them anyway. I do feel a tad better today

least

Welcome to the family. You'll find lots of support and useful info here.

HeartsAfire

Welcome. Recovery works but you gotta bust your butt to make it work. And you've got to want it more than those 30. We're here w/you every step of the way - fighting right alongside you.

Hevyn

Brad - This miserable feeling will pass, and you'll begin to feel a bit better each day. You're not alone.

Goadster

looks like we're all in this boat together!! It's comforting knowing I'm not the only one who feels this way.
Hang in there!!!

Wastinglife

Hi Brad,
I've put back a 24 case on my own when I was a full blown alcoholic already. 30 is not a good sign.

Nuudawn

Sweetie...after the weekend's heavy consumption (and well...that wasn't your first rodeo now was it?)... and the realization that you've had enough of that nightmare...of course you're feeling downtrodden. Good news is...you don't have to feel this way anymore.

You mind, body and soul have suffered damage as a result of excessive consumption. Today you are taking the first step in ridding yourself of this perpetual misery and slow physical and spiritual suicide.

We're all here with you friend. Keep on keepin' on.

Dee74

Hi and welcome Brad

We 'get it' here - you're not alone

I well remember the Monday morning 'OMG blues'...the good news is with a little commitment and effort you never have to feel like this again

D

brad13

I know everyone here has felt what im feeling or some version of it. Its still good to hear the support and i know the depression will improve. My wife asked me if i Wanted to quit drinking. That was a tough one to answer and the best i came up with was no, I want a beer right now, but i want to get better and I know that wont help me. I did force myself while i was working on a tile shower yesterday to talk out loud to myself and said" dude you are damn good at this, You are so good at anything you set your mind to." Im tired of hating myself and even if i dont believe it right away I will make a point to vocalize something positive about me every day until i do start to maybe find love for myself.