Recent DUI-I'm feeling like a mess tonight..
 

I recently got sentenced for my DUI (first one) totally blew up my life! I was feeling hopeful and trying to be grateful but tonight I'm feeling really alone and depressed. I told my sponsor how I'm feeling and she told be that she thinks that I got off easy and that I should write down all of the negative things that I did while drinking but it's making me feel worse. I know she's giving me tough love but I feel like she just doesn't get it. She's never been through it before.

Anyone else out there been through a DUI that can offer any hope? I am single and I don't have any support at home. I can't believe this is my life. I don't want to drink but I do feel like I'm going crazy. Wow, I'm such a whiner..

Welcome to the family. :) I've never had a DUI but want to welcome you to the site. You'll find lots of support here.

No DUI, but I can tell you that seasons in life pass, this one will too. I suggest doing a little internet research on what you are going to do to distract yourself from your woes. How about getting a dog - a great companion and gets your out of the house and meeting people (sober ones) -or if a dog doesn't fit with your life, maybe volunteer or pick up a new hobby?

I had a DUI back in 2006. It was my first and only and like you, I felt depressed and scared. The thing is, it gets better. You will get through your sentence and while it will be very inconvenient and costly, you will come out the other side.

Unfortunately, my DUI didn't stop me from drinking except for a couple of months. It took me another two years to finally decide I had enough. I hope you will learn from this and do whatever it takes to stop drinking. (((HUGS)))

Thanks for the encouragement! I am usually good at encouraging others but tonight I just feel icky! I have a wonderful 14 year old kitty! So that's a plus! She's old and curmudgeonly but I love her!

Hi Rina ~ Glad you are here and posting. For some reason, once I post about something on here, it seems to take the power out of it. SRers are the most encouraging people, and there is much wisdom and lots of fun on these threads, too.

I had a DUI in 2005. I ignored the warning signs and continued to drink for another 5 years. The DUI was bad as far as the shame and all the money it cost to deal with it. Hire a lawyer if you can. I am just glad I didn't hurt anyone.

Thanks for sharing Suki! I am really jumping into AA with all my might because I know that alcoholism is a progressive disease! I was sober for many years because I had experienced too many "close calls" and then I started drinking a few months before I got my DUI which occurred after a family barbecue this past Memorial Day when I was weaving home and blew a .23!!! Horrific! Every time I start to rationalize my drinking in the future-because it is inevitable since I'm an alcoholic- I just have to look at that number! I just feel so guilty right now and terrified of picking up again!

I'm thankful no one was hurt-that would have been worse than horrific! I was just sentenced so I know my punishments and I've been on probation for a few weeks now. My attorney cost me $2500 dollars and I was sentenced to all of the minimum requirements you can receive for getting an extreme DUI. Some moments I feel hopeful and some moments I feel hopeless. Tonight I appreciate any kind words or thoughts anyone can offer.

It is OK to feel hopeless right now. Because then when a hope does enter your brain it will feel like the biggest accomplishment ever!

While I have never gotten a DUI, I did take a long-acting sleeping pill after drinking a bottle of wine. This in itself would not be such a big deal (totally warped thinking) except that I proceeded to deep clean my entire house in a 6-hour time period. That is completely unlike me. When I woke up the next day I asked my husband, "Oh my gosh did you stay up and clean all night? It is such a nice surprise and so unlike you!?! What's up?"

Alcohol, among other things, is just plain bad for us. Hang in there. You are processing and it just takes time.

:grouphug:

Keep trying Rina, keep your chin up.

I'm on my second... I had a head on collision with a BAC of .4, what would you like to know?
It gets better... keep off the drink, take your financial hit, move one.

It's not tough love from your sponsor, it's perhaps what you should be doing...
It's just a road bump when put into perspective of your entire life.
Learn from it.

You haven't blown your life... you are just not thinking right...

Hang in there, Rina. :hug: Turn in early and be kind to yourself. No need to write out the negatives while you're feeling hopeless. Ride through the hopeless wave to get to a better hopeful one. You will have good days and bad days but you don't have to ever go through THIS again. And it will get better.

:grouphug: (((Rina))) :grouphug:

Sorry to hear of your hard time, Rina. In the early days of getting sober, I could NOT look at the negatives, I was in such a bad head space that would have sent me over the edge. Instead, do what you have to do to make things right, and then be kind to yourself, you can examine your behaviors later- but do try and stay sober. Nothing will be better if you drink, and if you think one DUI is bad, two would be worse.

There is lots of advice on this site, and lots of people with experience that will share with you. Stay, and get better. Because it really does get better.

I had a DU I in 2006 and I too did not realize it was a sign of being on a path to destruction with alcohol. I fell into a worse situation when I was no longer driving because going out and about with my car was no longer an option so staying home and making drinking more of a hobby is what happened to me. I just fell into it because I was not prepared with a plan of how to live my life without driving. If I could rewind I'd have made a different hobby for myself until I got my license back. It did suck but I got used to it.

Thanks-it's good to hear that you have such a positive outlook in your situation. I need to be more like you.

In my opinion, this is a good thing while you are trying to turn your ship upright. The terror helped me. Gave me time to realize where my alcohol-drinking tendencies were hiding throughout my life - Surprise! They were everywhere I looked! The time with terror was short compared to the time of the totally warped thinking and confusion that accompanied the duration of my life drinking alcohol.

In time you will start seeing more clearly. Time and riding through the horror was how I found myself in a more peaceful and forgiving state. Giving yourself time to get there might just be a most amazing act of self-love? You are not alone in this. Not at all.

:grouphug:

Yes, it is such a blow that I couldn't ever imagine would be so hard. Driving is such a privilege that I have taken for granted since the day I turned 16! In my town- public transportation is a joke. Since I live alone it is really hard for me to reach out and ask for rides and stuff. I decided to ride my bike to AA meetings and I've had Lawn Crews stop and offer to take me where I need to go and of course I freaked out about being abducted! I've lived such a sheltered life! My anxiety and catastrophizing are driving me crazy but I haven't drank yet and have only had fleeting thoughts about it.

Hi Rita......I had my 2nd DUI in 14 years about 1 1/2 years ago. The shame & sense of hopelessness I felt was so bad...I seriously wanted to throw some things in a backpack, get myself up to the freeway, stick my thumb out & disappear. If it wasn't for the fact that would have hurt the ones that loved me more than the other...I would have done that. I didn't & just tried to be thankful that I didn't hurt anyone. All total it cost over $7000.00, lost my license for a year, have an emissions device for 2 years, went through a treatment program, lost my job because part of my job was transporting clients. I'm getting through it though.....I think the thing that has helped me the most is knowing I'm not alone in this....your not alone in this (PM me anytime). When I went to court....there was 2 other people being charged with manslaughter, for drinking & driving...that could have been me. ((hugs to you))....you will get through this.

We've all had moments linked to our drinking we wish we could undo--you're trying to do the right thing by taking control now :)

Glad you're here!!