Thomasthetank

It's saturday and past 2am and I can't sleep because I'm alone. I have no doubt that my break up was a good choice don't get me wrong, but I miss somebody next to me, even if that someone isn't a very nice person.

I guess it's the warmth of human contact that I miss.

I don't have silly aspirations of love. If I can meet somebody to sit around watching Netflix and laughing, without having to compromise who I am, I'll be a happy guy.

I know, I know, I'm just whining about post break up pains, but damn if they don't hurt.

But for now I guess I'll make do with a couple of biscuits and the Red Dwarf dvd extras.

Tom.

meganrnc

Definitely relate.. I've been single as long as I've been sober.. And I'm like no booze or men?!?! Lol. I feel lonely also. And it stinks. But I also am very secure in myself and being single. I won't settle and won't dictate my happiness on a relationship. People say it'll happen when I least expect it bla bla. We shall see!

Sent from my iPhone using SoberRecovery

Gilmer

It's good that you checked in to SR. We may not be there, but at least we're here!

roguedreams

TTT (Thomas The Tank) - I can soooo totally relate. And I'm glad you posted too, because I didn't quite have the guts to do so myself, but am really feeling the emptiness tonight.

I could give you all the advice that I'm not using (like my Mom used to say, "take my advice, I'm not using it!" Lol) but I'm going to zip it and just say - I can totally commiserate. It sucks.

So here we are, not-alone in our alone-ness.

melki

I feel very lonely too. No advice here either. It's just painful.

"Take my advice, I'm not using it", hehee

LBrain

wish I could say something to make it go away. I can't. But I do know that time heals all wounds. I've been there more than once.
try to keep your mind occupied tttt. You'll get through it.

Bailey3

I completely relate. My heart goes out to you. Just hang on there hopefully it will get better.

doureallycare2

I feel it also, Its a deep longing.. Its what makes me want even the wrong relationship.... Its good to recognize that the weekend early mornings and nights are the worst for me so I can try to have a plan for something to do during those times. Im waiting for when im good just being by myself though...

Soberwolf

It will get better

FreeOwl

I get that... I've had to deal with loneliness (both with and without someone next to me).

I began to understand that loneliness is driven more from within than from having or not having others around us.

I think I've grown a lot in that regard. I have found myself recognizing that I actually desire some ALONE time - because it's healthy and restorative and I'm coming to Love the person I am with when I'm alone.

desypete

why would you think sitting around with someone watching netflix etc would bring you happiness ?

why dont you look at it this way, that if someone was with you watching netflix that you would probably end up arguing over what to watch ?

its so easy to fall into the romance of it all and not look at how things would really be in real life

sure it might be great for a short while but in the long term ???
people end up watching netflix in there own while there partners do something else the romance doesnt last long

how i coped with any sort of lonely feeling was to get my butt over to aa meetings were i would be surrounded by people just like me
it got me out of the flat i was in and amonst real living people, i made new friends in aa who are real friends and it certainly helped me out over feeling lonely

i remember being about a year sober and wishing i had someone to cuddle up to so i went on a mission to find someone as i was convinced it would be the answer to my problems
i dated lots and ended up heartbroken every time as i couldn't handle it, today i am very happy being on my own but it took me a lot of pain to find it out and come to see i had to be first of all happy with myself on my own before i could have anything to offer someone else in a realtionship

i wanted them to fix me and make me feel better rather than me making myself feel better

if your anything like i once was i used to listen to sad records a lot and think there all about me ?
today i dont listen to sad songs as there not about me at all there just songs : )

good luck to you and your not on your own

luvmygirls

The grass is always greener, isn't it? I'm never alone (if I'm not at work, I'm with my husband and 2 kids). Of course, I love them, but once in a while it would be nice to be able to take a nap or just not have someone talking to me, and asking me for stuff constantly.