Denial and depression
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Geismar, Louisiana
Posts: 13
Denial and depression
It took me a year to finally be able to say the word alcoholic referring to myself.. A year, lots of devastating things, IOP, and a lot of education as to what makes me one. I've never been addicted or NEED alcohol. But when I drink, even if twice a month, I lose control. And have had negative consequences. It's SOO hard to accept this. I haven't had any alcohol in 7 months. And just the last couple of weeks I've thought about how much I'm going to miss drinking and having "fun" with my friends. I'm 28 and single. I think about how I should've drank more when I could! (Yea that definitely makes me an alcoholic, right?!) I know I won't drink because I can't..(RN, nursing probation, drug tests) but I feel like I'll be depressed I can't. When other people my age are tailgating and having drinks I'll be at home feeling sorry for myself. I punish myself because I'm "defected." Ive suffered major depression my entire life and now I have to be an alcoholic too?! That's my sob story anyway. Trying to get into this AA stuff but haven't been inspired yet. Praying that God shows me what to take from it all!
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Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
If you made it through nursing school you know that genetics plays a big part in any disease process.
Alcoholism is no different.
Why would you stay home feeling sorry for yourself? I've been to lots of parties and not had a drink. It is fun to watch how silly my friends get.
Alcoholism is no different.
Why would you stay home feeling sorry for yourself? I've been to lots of parties and not had a drink. It is fun to watch how silly my friends get.
Guest
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: The Deep South
Posts: 14,636
The way I look at it is my drinking days are over, and all that goes along with it. I was 27 when I first got sober and I remember that year as the BEST year of my twenties. I still dated guys, went to a few bars and restaurants where drinking was going on, handled a stressful job... and stayed sober for a full year. I was in therapy and for the first time able to actually dig in and get something out of it.
If you can hang onto your sobriety, you're going to look back later and realize you did an awesome thing to get sober in your 20s!
If you can hang onto your sobriety, you're going to look back later and realize you did an awesome thing to get sober in your 20s!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Island Park , NY
Posts: 373
Nothing Funnier than watching others making asses of themselves, wish someone had videotaped some of my "better" runs! Stay Strong and Well! Bobby
And Congrats on Nursing , my Mom cleaned wealthy peoples houses till she was 56 yo, went and got her GED then her Licensed Practical Nurse Certification! She worked in the local hospital for 10 years , got vested in her pension and retired, she is 94 now and still going strong!
And Congrats on Nursing , my Mom cleaned wealthy peoples houses till she was 56 yo, went and got her GED then her Licensed Practical Nurse Certification! She worked in the local hospital for 10 years , got vested in her pension and retired, she is 94 now and still going strong!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Midwest, USA
Posts: 1,022
You have the FOMO! Fear Of Missing Out 
A lot of that comes from being bombarded with marketing and advertising for the past 28 years. When you think "tailgating" you get this Norman Rockwell version pictured in your head (or at least I do), where everyone is smiling and someone is throwing a football in the back, and the ribs are grilling over there by the pickup truck . .and who wouldn't want that?
But you can tailgate without drinking, so there's no reason you can't enjoy all that without getting hammered.
Look, you quit drinking for good reasons. Those reasons aren't going anywhere. If anything you have more reasons to quit drinking as you get older.
Also a mere $50/week in your 401k from now until retirement probably ends up as a third of a million dollars at 65, so it is important to start saving as early as possible (compounding, see), and that's like, what, one night at the bar?
well, maybe two nights at the bar for you.. I was a 270 lb man glug glug, those bar tabs get kinda long
A lot of that comes from being bombarded with marketing and advertising for the past 28 years. When you think "tailgating" you get this Norman Rockwell version pictured in your head (or at least I do), where everyone is smiling and someone is throwing a football in the back, and the ribs are grilling over there by the pickup truck . .and who wouldn't want that?
But you can tailgate without drinking, so there's no reason you can't enjoy all that without getting hammered.
Look, you quit drinking for good reasons. Those reasons aren't going anywhere. If anything you have more reasons to quit drinking as you get older.
Also a mere $50/week in your 401k from now until retirement probably ends up as a third of a million dollars at 65, so it is important to start saving as early as possible (compounding, see), and that's like, what, one night at the bar?
well, maybe two nights at the bar for you.. I was a 270 lb man
glug glug, those bar tabs get kinda long
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,756
Welcome to the forum and congrats on 7 months sober. 
When I first got sober I wondered what would I do with myself if I didn't drink. I couldn't envision my life without drinking, That's pretty sad.
I found out I can do anything I want, and do it better, sober.
When I first got sober I wondered what would I do with myself if I didn't drink. I couldn't envision my life without drinking, That's pretty sad.
I found out I can do anything I want, and do it better, sober.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Geismar, Louisiana
Posts: 13
Yea I know it sounds silly in the grand scheme of things. This is all so new and I've been so busy with work and treatment so things are just now winding down for me to have downtime and be like now what? I am not comfortable going to bars or places where heavy drinking is occurring yet but maybe one day I'll be there.
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