Im humbled now ....
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 315
Im humbled now ....
So, yesterday was day 6 AGAIN...2nd time
So that means that I had "about " two weeks sober except for blowing it twice.
I just had to blow it last night
I feel oh so much better when not drinking!! you know waking up easily being alert etc.
To keep this short I will say this
Im humbling myself to post and admit that:
-today is day 1
-I either need to stop all together or drink.
-Im going to stop.
There, I said it .
The fact that I have to humble myself tells me that Ive built up pride...
Pride comes before a fall....don't need pride about my drinking--
Pride tried to keep me from "admitting" today is day 1
Humility is letting me post to all that today is day 1.
So that means that I had "about " two weeks sober except for blowing it twice.
I just had to blow it last night
I feel oh so much better when not drinking!! you know waking up easily being alert etc.
To keep this short I will say this
Im humbling myself to post and admit that:
-today is day 1
-I either need to stop all together or drink.
-Im going to stop.
There, I said it .
The fact that I have to humble myself tells me that Ive built up pride...
Pride comes before a fall....don't need pride about my drinking--
Pride tried to keep me from "admitting" today is day 1
Humility is letting me post to all that today is day 1.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Montreal
Posts: 135
Livingnow, Welcome back budy and this time will be the good one!
Ask yourself why you drank, learn the lesson, pick yourself up again, raise your head-up high and sober-up again!
Every time you learn a lesson about yourself, you are more equip for the next round and at one point, you're going to succeed! But learning why you crashed then making the changes to be in more in control of your environment, is the only way to be move forward...
Beleive me, I crashed 8-9 times before joining this board (more then 50 times trying to slow down and ending up drinking a **** load more)... I learned all my lessons, I learn about myself so much every time and I figured out, at one point, that I needed support and this board fits right in!!
But to learn about yourself, you need to be humble, and as we all see today, you have that amazing quality, so you can do this!!!
Yesturday, I had it rough, I wanted to drink so bad... But I spent time online right here, reading stuff around... it gives me so much strenght!!
anyways... happy you're back budy!
Ask yourself why you drank, learn the lesson, pick yourself up again, raise your head-up high and sober-up again!
Every time you learn a lesson about yourself, you are more equip for the next round and at one point, you're going to succeed! But learning why you crashed then making the changes to be in more in control of your environment, is the only way to be move forward...
Beleive me, I crashed 8-9 times before joining this board (more then 50 times trying to slow down and ending up drinking a **** load more)... I learned all my lessons, I learn about myself so much every time and I figured out, at one point, that I needed support and this board fits right in!!
But to learn about yourself, you need to be humble, and as we all see today, you have that amazing quality, so you can do this!!!
Yesturday, I had it rough, I wanted to drink so bad... But I spent time online right here, reading stuff around... it gives me so much strenght!!
anyways... happy you're back budy!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Montreal
Posts: 135
Reading myself sounded like my father..... sorry about that... I'm not here to tell people what to do, but mostly to try to support soldiers that are battling, with me, the same demon!
I'm just glad you're back!
I'm just glad you're back!
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 267
Yesterday I was also on day 6 (also again) and stuck on an 8 hour drive, and despite remembering how low and worthless and physically awful I felt last week at this time, was already turning on the permission switches and anticipating that pint of JD at the end of the trail. I'm not sure how I made it past all the stores on my way home but I did (twice if I'm honest, because I did go back out again), came here, went to bed, and came here again this morning. The posts here can feel like a lifeline sometimes. Glad you're here. Everybody's pulling for you. Keep up the fight.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
Originally Posted by livingnow 
Pride comes before a fall
Actually, a repeated process that I'm getting tired of.
I hope that you don't drink today.
It helps if eventfully we get some time together.
Bob
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Glad you are back LivingNow. Look back at the last 2 weeks and try to see if there is something you can change so you can break the cycle. Are you following any type of plan or meetings?
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Originally Posted by livingnow
Scott, no plan, no meetings.
Its the friday nights......Wife works, leaving me "bored" thats why this happened ...twice
Its the friday nights......Wife works, leaving me "bored" thats why this happened ...twice
Sobriety requires action, a plan, and dedication to the plan with zero tolerance for excuses. You realize and admit what you need to to...that is a great start. Now you just need to find a plan that works and follow it.
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 315
Thank you Scott.
A plan....
Im thinking out loud.....
When I crave and am about to fold :
go to gym
go for walk, walk the dog.
come here (and post WHAT, help??)
is that a plan??
chime in please...I want to hear what you think.
thanks
A plan....
Im thinking out loud.....
When I crave and am about to fold :
go to gym
go for walk, walk the dog.
come here (and post WHAT, help??)
is that a plan??
chime in please...I want to hear what you think.
thanks
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 8,637
you might want to look at herradura's "Where is the PLAN" thread. Here was my perspective that you might find useful.
...generally, for me anyway, THE PLAN includes these components;
What will I do instead of drinking - SPECIFICALLY?
What will I drink in settings where alcohol is present - Definite and specific alternatives!
What will I SAY to people that doesn't make me feel uncomfortable, when offered alcohol or asked about my not drinking? SPECIFIC, REHEARSED responses
What resources will I rely on to help me honor my choice of sobriety and remember why I made it? (AA, Big Book Study, Calls to a sponsor or friends in recovery, SR posting and reading, therapy, etc).
How often will I do these things?
What will be the signs that I need to step it up because my sobriety is being challenged? How - SPECIFICALLY - will I respond?
What will I say to my family?
How broadly will I discuss my choice of sobriety? Do I need different "levels" of sharing? What specifically will I say for each level?
Service work is important - how will I give back in life? Specific actions.
What new interests and activities will I focus on?
Whether or not I'm "working steps" - what areas of my life need attention (beyond just not drinking) - and what actions will I take?? (e.g. cleaning up debts, making up with people I've hurt, forgiving myself, forgiving others...)
What will I do to cultivate my own sense of spirituality, belief or faith in SOMETHING?
There are probably lots more areas but the bottom line is that when we say "Have a PLAN" - we mean going through all of these types of questions and issues and getting very clear and specific for ourselves on WHAT WE ARE GOING TO DO.
Sobriety means action. It means changing our habits and our ways of dealing with and responding to life. It usually means re-wiring ourselves after years and decades of patterns we've formed.
Just don't drink - that's only the removal of the toxin and the main 'culprit' that got us here. But once that's set aside, the real work begins. Life just doesn't suddenly get rosy and we're cured and move on in bliss and utopia because we stuck the plug in the jug
...generally, for me anyway, THE PLAN includes these components;
What will I do instead of drinking - SPECIFICALLY?
What will I drink in settings where alcohol is present - Definite and specific alternatives!
What will I SAY to people that doesn't make me feel uncomfortable, when offered alcohol or asked about my not drinking? SPECIFIC, REHEARSED responses
What resources will I rely on to help me honor my choice of sobriety and remember why I made it? (AA, Big Book Study, Calls to a sponsor or friends in recovery, SR posting and reading, therapy, etc).
How often will I do these things?
What will be the signs that I need to step it up because my sobriety is being challenged? How - SPECIFICALLY - will I respond?
What will I say to my family?
How broadly will I discuss my choice of sobriety? Do I need different "levels" of sharing? What specifically will I say for each level?
Service work is important - how will I give back in life? Specific actions.
What new interests and activities will I focus on?
Whether or not I'm "working steps" - what areas of my life need attention (beyond just not drinking) - and what actions will I take?? (e.g. cleaning up debts, making up with people I've hurt, forgiving myself, forgiving others...)
What will I do to cultivate my own sense of spirituality, belief or faith in SOMETHING?
There are probably lots more areas but the bottom line is that when we say "Have a PLAN" - we mean going through all of these types of questions and issues and getting very clear and specific for ourselves on WHAT WE ARE GOING TO DO.
Sobriety means action. It means changing our habits and our ways of dealing with and responding to life. It usually means re-wiring ourselves after years and decades of patterns we've formed.
Just don't drink - that's only the removal of the toxin and the main 'culprit' that got us here. But once that's set aside, the real work begins. Life just doesn't suddenly get rosy and we're cured and move on in bliss and utopia because we stuck the plug in the jug
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